Would you turn down this State school for an independent school? (a bit long!)

[QueenMeabhOfConnaught]

Opinions wanted.

Ds has been offered a place at the local Comp 15 mins walk away but he also has a place at an independent school.

The independent school has the usual advantages - excellent exam results, lovely grounds, fabulous facilities etc etc etc. No-one else from his primary would be going there. It is 20 mins walk away.

The State school is a rather run-down 1960s building achieving 53% A*-C GCSEs including Maths & English, average GCSE points per student of 419.9 and added value of 997.5. Quite a few children from his primary will be going there. It got a "Good" Ofsted - level 2s on everything but language provision isn't great and they don't do separate sciences. It has a new head who seems pretty strict.

Dh thinks that the State school isn't good enough and would prefer the independent school. I think the State school isn't bad (it's actually one of the better ones in this borough) plus it is free. School fees would be manageable for one child - two will be difficult.

Would you be happy with these kinds of results or is dh right?

I was the eldest,and state educated all the way and my brother went to private school. My mum made these choices based on family circumstances and our personalities. I didn't want to board, so didn't and went to the comp. I would have done better at private school, and I spent years being called a swot and a snob as my Dad was RN officer, and I was the only officers' kid in the year group.

Labels such as swot and geek can be and are applied to children who want to learn. In some cases this puts them off trying to learn as they don't want to be perceived as different. It can also lead in some cases to not having many friends and being perceived as 'uncool'.

I think you have to look at your kids as individuals, but offer them the same opportunities. DS2 may not want to go the private school, or you may get a reduction on the fees if you have more than one child there. If DS1 would do better at the private school, then put him there, and explore ways with the bursar of how to pay for DS2 when the time comes.At least you'll be able to hand uniform and sports kit down, so will only have to buy one set.

Well, it has been very therapeutic to write it all down and, as a result, I finally understand why I am so concerned about ds1.

I have seen first-hand how a bad school can damage the future of a happy, confident, intelligent, charming boy from a supportive home. I am looking at ds1 and seeing my brother at that age and thinking about what happened to him. But ds1 is not him and it's not the same school.

I must go and look again at the Comp (as snorkle says). I have already re-visited the independent school. I mustn't let the past dictate the future.

Thank you - this is the first time I have posted to this extent on this site and everyone's views have been hugely helpful.

I sent DD1 to our local secondary school last September. It's a "good" school in a nice area with 61% of children getting 5 GCSE's incl Maths and English. It was a bit lower than I'd have liked, but the school is fairly nice (and I went there some years ago too!). DD is bright, and was in the top sets, but after a while it transpired she was very unhappy there. Although she had made some new friends, it turned out she was finding the lessons really boring, and that the teachers were spending quite a lot of time controlling the class, and not enough time actually teaching.

After some agonising - including over whether we could afford the fees, we moved her into a girls independent school. She's a changed child, back to being very motivated and is loving it. DD2 starts this September. We've had to make some sacrifices, but have no regrets.

She still sees some of her friends from the secondary school, which is great, as they are more local than the private school. I think she would have done OK if she'd stayed, but now I think she'll do better, and more importantly enjoy her time there more.

Good luck with whatever you decide...

That is really interesting, Surr3ymummy - more food for thought!

Are you sure that you nwould not qualify for a means tested bursary,you may find that you wouldn't qualify with only one child at the school but that by the time the second goes you would,also they are raely all or nothing awards and you may be able to get a proportion off the fees on alsiding scale,I would contact the admissions registrar or bursar and ask them

Talk you ds out of computing - mickey mouse subject. Teenage boys with access to PC at home have a much greater aptitude for computers than computer science gcse syllabus allows for. triple science much more fun.

Although we would qualify for a bursary on grounds of income, floaty, they also take assets into account. We have no mortgage on our house so they puts us out of the running.

Generally what income level would you need to be below in order to qualify for a bursary?

It will vary according to the local demographic princessosyth. I can't remember the details but newspaper articles recently suggest that the income bar for bursaries is surprisingly high (meaning more people are eligible than one might think) because of course now most secondary independent schools are mindful of the need to show how they using their charitable status to give less wealthy children subsidised places.

Thanks.

Thanks, batters.

princessosyth, you may find this posted on another thread by LadyMuck helpful. If you scroll down, there's a sliding scale. Obviously precise amounts will depend on local conditions, as others have said.

Thanks Hallgerda, very surprised to see that if our income levels remain the same we would qualify!