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Secondary education

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Original poster

I KNOW I am being unreasonable but it still stinks

56 replies

TheOrigRights · 21/04/2023 14:44

My son (like most) will be on strike day 5 come the end of April.
I fully support the teachers.
He has had 4 days off sick since September.

My request to take him out of school one day next week to attend a wedding has been declined. I understand that attendance and strike action are completely unrelated, but it does leave me with a slight bitter taste in my mouth to have the importance of attendance explained to me and the impact on his education.

I think they could have just refused the application according to rule bla bla without giving me a lecture.

Just needed to get that off my chest.

OP posts:
Aylestone · 21/04/2023 14:47

I wouldn’t have even bothered asking, a wedding isn’t going to be authorised. I know you shouldn’t encourage lying but I’d have just said they were sick

LiliLil · 21/04/2023 14:47

Agree completely.

I support teachers 100% but it stings a bit when my son will have had 6 strike days by the end of the month but I know I’ll face a fine if I take him out for a few days in September to go away with family.

WheelsUp · 21/04/2023 14:50

The rules used to be that authorised absences were at the discretion of head teachers but attendance is something that OFSTED uses to judge schools hence the pressure to attend even when not fully well.

Original poster
TheOrigRights · 21/04/2023 14:51

Aylestone · 21/04/2023 14:47

I wouldn’t have even bothered asking, a wedding isn’t going to be authorised. I know you shouldn’t encourage lying but I’d have just said they were sick

It would have looked really suspect though.
Strike, sick, weekend, weekend, bank holiday, strike.

Not that we'd consider going away for 6 days anyway, what with me working and all.

OP posts:
JeannieAlogy · 21/04/2023 15:13

WheelsUp · 21/04/2023 14:50

The rules used to be that authorised absences were at the discretion of head teachers but attendance is something that OFSTED uses to judge schools hence the pressure to attend even when not fully well.

In my experience, there are times when head teachers would like to authorise absence but the way that OFSTED judges schools, and the way that they Local Authority runs things means they cannot.

If it's a one day absence it is unlikely to attract a fine if you take him out of school that day, but again, it's up to how things work between your school and Local Authority as to whether a fine is implemented.

Postapocalypticcowgirl · 22/04/2023 13:38

A one day absence shouldn't attract a fine? If it's unauthorised, then that won't actually harm him in any way.

Just say you understand they can't authorise it, but you're taking him out for the day anyway.

I don't think you'll be the only one.

LucifersLight · 22/04/2023 13:46

YANBU they are hypocrites.

Teachers who strike should be fined just as parents are fined. Or neither should be fined.

Theunamedcat · 22/04/2023 13:50

I woukd take my child out for one day regardless in fact I am in July its midweek we are going to my daughter for the day she is graduating I will ask but if they say no I will simply not take them to school and tell them why on the app they can drive and collect them if they want its three hours away

Janek · 22/04/2023 13:55

LucifersLight · 22/04/2023 13:46

YANBU they are hypocrites.

Teachers who strike should be fined just as parents are fined. Or neither should be fined.

Teachers who strike lose a day's pay. A fine for not working, if you will.

00100001 · 22/04/2023 13:57

LucifersLight · 22/04/2023 13:46

YANBU they are hypocrites.

Teachers who strike should be fined just as parents are fined. Or neither should be fined.

Ha ha you can't fine people for striking!!

00100001 · 22/04/2023 13:58

LucifersLight · 22/04/2023 13:46

YANBU they are hypocrites.

Teachers who strike should be fined just as parents are fined. Or neither should be fined.

And it's not the teachers making the rules...

Fairislefandango · 22/04/2023 14:01

So because teachers are striking, do you want schools to just have a blanket amnesty on parents taking kids out of school for normally unauthorised reasons? Or just your child? Or just weddings? I understand it's annoying not to have permission to take him, but surely you don't actually think that schools should change their absence policy just because there have been teacher strikes?

SequinsandStilettos · 22/04/2023 14:24

I would also take it as an unauthorised. Thursday to Tuesday off means they can easily catch up Friday's work from the VLE.

ShowUs · 22/04/2023 14:34

The idea is that the entire year group will still be at the same level when they’re off on strike.

Unauthorised absences for holidays etc means that they get left behind whilst the rest of their class/year is ahead and have probably moved on to a next topic.

I do understand what you mean though and I would never even ask for something like this and I’d just say they are poorly or have an appointment (I’m a teacher) as they’re not allowed to authorise it else they could get into trouble.

BB2023 · 22/04/2023 14:35

I hear you! Our parents evening was in the middle on the last strikes and our school sent an email out to all the parents saying that the teachers would be discussing absence and that kids shouldn't miss school blah blah. I absolutely support the strikes but it just felt like bad timing by the school tbh. As it happens our teacher didn't say anything and whilst I wouldn't have been rude to him if he did I felt like the email could have potentially led to some difficult conversations for the teachers.

Restforabit · 22/04/2023 14:38

It’s the lecture that is infuriating.

Can’t weddings be authorised. Code C, other authorised circumstances?

Hollyhead · 22/04/2023 14:41

Don't bother asking, just be assertive, it won't be authorised, so on the very occasional time I take mine out I just write to the school saying that DS won't be attending on that date due to xxx reason and that I realise this will be unauthorised, and I apologise for any inconvenience caused. I generally get a lovely message back saying to have a nice time.

Original poster
TheOrigRights · 22/04/2023 16:04

Fairislefandango · 22/04/2023 14:01

So because teachers are striking, do you want schools to just have a blanket amnesty on parents taking kids out of school for normally unauthorised reasons? Or just your child? Or just weddings? I understand it's annoying not to have permission to take him, but surely you don't actually think that schools should change their absence policy just because there have been teacher strikes?

Did you read my post, or even the title? I have said I know the two issues are separate.
I only said it stung a bit to have the importance of me supporting my son's attendance pointed out to me.

OP posts:
noblegiraffe · 22/04/2023 16:16

People don't like being told off, so perfectly reasonable to feel that way.

Schools are under massive pressure to improve attendance, so pointing out attendance is importance is basically the script that any request for absence that is rejected will get. It wasn't personal.

DRS1970 · 22/04/2023 16:40

I wouldn't have asked...

Mumof1andacat · 22/04/2023 17:08

I would have just sent an email letting them know he wouldn't be in. I wouldn't ask for permission. My son was 'refused' permission to go on a big international holiday last year and they said the time would be unauthorised and I would be fined. I said OK and went on holiday as planned.

SamPoodle123 · 22/04/2023 17:23

I think if your dc is doing well academically, then fine to pull them out for an important occasion. It is only a problem if they are struggling at school and missing too many days.

Fireyflies · 22/04/2023 17:27

I can see why it seems unfair - they're telling you that a single day will damage his education, which is just bollocks really. Just take him anyway - you're unlikely to be fined.

Ellmau · 22/04/2023 18:31

It's shame the wedding doesn't coincide with a strike day.

Could you say you thought it was?

Original poster
TheOrigRights · 22/04/2023 20:24

To be clear, I am was just having a moan.
I do not want to lie.
I understand policies etc.

I did not consider @Hollyhead's approach, but will do that if I need to.

OP posts:
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