School behaviour policy and scope of authority

[Smeeth]

My 15 yr son has just been excluded by his school. He had 5 friends at home on friday night supervised by myself with a few beers, later in evening he was filmed by one of the boys making some slightly slurred insensitive race related comments, all the boys were white. One of the boys shared the video without my sons permission to a snapchat group of 20, one of the non-white boys on group shared with his parents who raised a concern over the offensive language to the school. The school behaviour policy only extends off site to education trips and buses and the home is 14 miles from school and boys not wearing school uniform etc. The school have just sanctioned my son not the boy who posted the video without permission. The school conducted a limited investigation and did not establish context or even speak to myself (despite attempts by me to speak to school staff dealing with incident). They have also refused to share redacted copy of the video (all other copies destroyed) son and I have not seen it and redacted copies of the specific complaints
My son is contrite but I have wider concerns on the schools processes, scope of authority and decision making. It has got to the stage I would rather it was a police complaint as he would be dealt with fairly, proportionally and reasonably.

Sorry for long message but lots of issues to unpick, I have raised my concerns at process already with school, I am giving then another 24 hrs to respond before I submit GDPR request and raise complaint to governors.

Any advice precedent. Son and boys have learned lessons but there are some dangerous and worrying wider issues of principle here.

Any legal precedents/advice - I have government policies etc
Thank you.

The language used by my son was apparently offensive - not grossly offensive, it was not motivated by hostility and he has no previous on race or bullying issues, in fact he has many strong friendships with non white children in his year he have spoken out for him.

Yabu. Your son was racist. You let a load of underage children drink alcohol (that's very much illegal) yabvvvvu. Sort your child out

All other issues aside, it is not illegal for children to drink alcohol if they're over the age of 5.
The laws around alcohol are based on the ability to purchase or the location you drink it (pub, restaurant, licensed premises, alcohol exclusion zones etc).
There are no laws that say a 15 year old cannot drink alcohol in a private house.

You're going to get nothing other than every respondent telling you to suck it up, buttercup.
Your child was racist. And drunk (ew).

Ok well I'm not going to argue on the law then but I'm surprised given that it's illegal to purchase alcohol for a minor, which it sounds like is exactly what the OP did. Did the other parents know and give consent? Extremely poor judgement at the very least. The main issue though is your son's attitudes, and yours from the sound of it. Saying things like 'he has non white friends' just makes you sound more like a jerk.

The government policy is that schools can sanction for online behaviour that happens off school premises that might harm the reputation of the school, which could well include drunken racism.

This should be in the school behaviour policy.

So it sounds like your quibble is that your DS should get away with it because the school doesn’t specifically list this in their behaviour policy? (Basically you’ve found a loophole?)

I think it would be preferable in this case for your DS to learn the consequence of his actions than for his parents to argue the toss.

Why are you not mortified that your 15 year old was drunk and making racist remarks? Why are you not mortified that you supplied other people’s kids with alcohol?
Why are these kids so dim that they film each other doing stuff that they know is unacceptable?

Life lesson!!!

I would lodge a subject access request for your son to get a copy of the video and see what he said.
You could lodge a complaint about the uploader of the video. But I doubt your son wants that.

Unless this is permanent exclusion you may be better off telling your son that you think exclusion is a bit harsh, but it's only a few days. The stress of you fighting this for your son may be counter productive to him. (Is he y11 or y10?)

Is there nothing in the policy about bringing the school into disrepute? I'd say that's what this is.

Not sure which is worse providing alcohol to growing teens, which research shows increases cancer risks and early liver failure or the obvious way you are belittling the racist child you have raised.

Maybe take the time to up the parenting standards and teach your son right from wrong.

It has got to the stage I would rather it was a police complaint as he would be dealt with fairly, proportionally and reasonably.
😂😂😂

^^ I hope they do go to the Police!
Your son needs to learn consequences. You are just another entitled parent trying to help their child dodge reality.

I am not surprised they have sanctioned your son and not the boy who posted the video. The fact it was posted without consent is not their concern. The fact that a video of one of their pupils drunk and using racist language was available online is. Whilst the school should cover the sanctions for online behaviour in their behaviour policy, this is a "should" not a "must".

In terms of scope of authority, the law draws very wide limits. The government advice on online conduct and conduct away from the school is that pupils can be sanctioned for things they do:

• when taking part in any school-organised or school-related activity;
• when travelling to or from school;
• when wearing school uniform;
• when in some other way identifiable as a pupil at the school;
• that could have repercussions for the orderly running of the school;
• that poses a threat to another pupil; or
• that could adversely affect the reputation of the school.

Your son's actions could potentially qualify under several of those headings.

I struggle to see how context helps. He was drunk. He used racist language. The fact it was a party supervised by you and you supplied the drinks doesn't alter or mitigate that. The fact the video was posted without consent doesn't alter or mitigate that.

I'm afraid I agree with others that you are being very unreasonable.

Presumably it's a fixed term exclusion - a few days? If so he needs to do the time, provide a genuine apology at the restart meeting and get on with the rest of his term. And watch his behaviour in future.

Hi OP, I'm afraid I agree with PPs and think your instinct to fight the school on policy is wrong in this case.

Can you confirm the duration of the exclusion? As long as not permanent then I do think that your energy would be better used trying to accept the responsibility you hold for providing alcohol, and that your son holds for his offensive language.

If you both were to apologise for the offence that your ill-judged actions and words have caused, that would likely be a far better way forward. You are both at fault.

By looking for someone else to blame or minimising what has happened you are setting a poor example to your son.

If you're not going to be responsible for bringing your kids up properly, don't complain that school are trying to sort him out.

I agree with prh47bridge’s assessment. There’s nothing in the school’s actions which I would consider dangerous or worrying.

I have no legal advice to add. But but...and I'm not in any way condoning whatever your DS actually said... but jeez no wonder children have such high levels of anxiety these days. One poorly judged comment when under the influence at 15 and someone's videoed it, passed it on, the school end up with a copy, and boom 💥

I'm pretty relaxed about alcohol compared to most on here, but I would be furious if my ds was given a few beers-enough to makeover least your d's drunk, at someone else's house.

From your OP the school have been very clear why he is being excluded. They are not going to sanction the boy who shared the video and it's probably been shared so many times. But I do get the impression you are excusing his behaviour. Maybe you could have sat down and explained to your son why you support the school decision in this instance, harsh as it may be.

I would have preferred educating him on why what he says was not acceptable and the roots of where he learnt that language and thinks it's ok to use in the safety of his white friends- but maybe that needs to come from you rather than the school.

Seems fair to me. Concentrate on teaching your child to do better, instead of arguing with the school for taking action against racism. Schools are better without racist kids and parents like you.

If it’s a fixed term exclusion, you are doing your son no favours by going to war with the school on this. The school has acted correctly in sanctioning racist language towards another pupil. Hopefully your son has learned a valuable lesson (and you won’t be allowing under age drinking in your home again).

If it’s a permanent exclusion, you can challenge it and outline the context you feel is relevant. Otherwise, take it on the chin and set an example to your child.