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Secondary education

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Original poster

DS won’t revise!

31 replies

winnieverlast · 31/12/2022 16:51

DS has GCSE mocks in three weeks but hasn’t revised at all basically. He’s very able and predicted mainly 9s but just won’t focus enough to revise and can’t be bothered. He would rather go for a run or read. I’m worried he’ll do this for the real thing as well. It’s not as if he’s going to fail anything so he hasn’t got to worry about that and his maths skills are great so he does fine in the science, but how on earth doi

OP posts:
Original poster
winnieverlast · 31/12/2022 16:54

-get him to revise??
(Accidentally pressed post!)
Anyway, I need simple revision strategies or things to tell him to motivate. I’m not holding his hand and doing it with him, I don’t have the time, and I don’t want him spending all of his time at his books, but at the same time, he’s done about two hours actual work since the end of school.
(It’s not the phone for anyone who suggests taking it away, he leaves his phone downstairs anyway and our wifi is too appalling for him to watch anything on his laptop in his room).
Any ideas?

OP posts:
PocketSand · 31/12/2022 17:05

IME ability means level 7 can be achieved without specific revision but exam technique is required for level 9. There may not be gaps in understanding but for GCSE it needs to be expressed in a particular way to gain full marks on the easier questions Eg the use of the word 'only' can make the difference between 1 mark and 2 marks. It all adds up.

redskydelight · 31/12/2022 17:09

All you as a parent can do is provide a suitable study space and anything he might need (access to laptop/other device, printer, books, stationary, past papers, revision guides etc).
You can't physically force someone to work. At best you can force them to sit and look at their stuff for an hour and get resentful. You can also determine whether there is a reason he doesn't want to revise (doesn't understand how to, doesn't know where to start, doesn't think he should have to in the school holidays ..) - if there is, that's something you can help with.

If your child is predicted 9s, then he's being doing something right so far. And many students don't work as much as they perhaps could and take mocks as a wake up call.

PocketSand · 31/12/2022 17:16

I would advise downloading past papers with mark schemes. Similar questions come up again and again. He can easily learn how to answer them. Don't panic.

Sarahcoggles · 31/12/2022 17:17

Bribery!

Lottsbiffandsmudge · 31/12/2022 17:19

Tbh I'd leave him alone. He'll either not do as well as expected in his mocks and it'll shock him into revising for the real things.
Or he'll do fine anyway.
As long as he has a space to study, has some idea how to and your full support then it's down to him...

Dotcheck · 31/12/2022 17:21

Mocks results tend to kick them up the ass.

Marylou62 · 31/12/2022 17:22

My 25 yr old was the same.. very frustrating as he could have achieved higher grades..he wouldn't even finish the coursework for DT...but...
He left college after a few months, joined the navy..(left a week after he turned 17...sob), qualified as a chef, travelled the world, stayed in NZ for 9 months having a great time...
He's working/and university now (he had to do access for a year as no A levels)..he got the Chancellor's Award last year for getting top mark's in his course..
I'm not telling you this to brag..but I felt so upset with his blasé attitude...but he's getting there his own way...
Maybe your DS will be the same?

Felicity42 · 31/12/2022 17:23

There's nothing you can do to actually make him study.
Currently you are the one with the problem.

He's could be very anxious underneath so more anxiety from you may not be helpful.
He's doing fine so far. Let him have his downtime.

PeekAtYou · 31/12/2022 17:24

Sometimes they need the shock of the mock grade to start thinking about revising. In your shoes I'd be hoping that he doesn't get all 9s so he realises that he can't wing it.

PeekAtYou · 31/12/2022 17:25

I meant I'd hope he wouldn't get all 9 IN THE MOCKS.

jamoncrumpets · 31/12/2022 17:27

IME lots of Year 11 boys don't bother revising for their mocks, then get a rude awakening a week later when they don't achieve their potential.

clary · 31/12/2022 17:28

I mean "go for a run or read" I'm liking anyway. Both good ways for a teen to spend their time.

But I hear you. IME the best thing (in fact all) you can do is provide all they could need (stationery, revision guides, texts, past papers, snacks, quiet space, snacks) and let them get on. If he chooses not to and then does badly it may spur him on.

He may be one of those students for whom ks4 exams are a walk in the park. There is no doubt that an able, hard working, engaged student who has focused well in lessons for the last five years can do well in things like maths, MFL, Eng lang without a great deal of rote learning. I know I did. I realise that this may be a controversial view. Thing is, it's not a good thing, as sooner or later wham! You come up against exams for which you WILL have to work (for me is was uni, hence a 2:2 after my stellar school grades).

PocketSand · 31/12/2022 17:29

I don't think that sitting down with notes and books is good revision. Unless it is self-motivated nothing goes in plus exams are based on what comes out.

But you can ask your teen to complete certain papers (mine has ASD and ADHD) to gain access to tech. And then mark them yourself and work on areas where they are losing marks due to exam technique.

CocoLux · 31/12/2022 17:29

It's on him. If he doesn't revise and he fucks up then it may be a wake up call. He's old enough to make his own mistakes.

fUNNYfACE36 · 31/12/2022 17:34

I dont think boys put the work in till it matters.
I am a little concerned by your naive comment that because he is good at maths he will do well at science.IME in the sciences Firstly there are a lot of facts to memorise and concepts to know, but also that candidates need to study mark schemes.The mark scheme often requires answers to be phrased in a very specific way.Answers may be correct and relevant, but if they don't get the buzz words, they don't get the marks

junebirthdaygirl · 31/12/2022 17:38

Just say to him: l suppose you know yourself what you need to do...so responsibility is back on him. Then if you can say: come to me if you need me to hear you out stuff and l can be here to help.
Then leave it with him. I presume he has been engaging well in school and has kept pretty up to date so he will be fine.
My ds did come to me the night before each exam..it does test your patience but nothing you say will make him. Actually he may do it if you back off. While you are doing the worrying there is no need for him to worry.
Running and reading might be the break he needs
Three gone through here.

PocketSand · 31/12/2022 17:42

fUNNYfACE36 · 31/12/2022 17:34

I dont think boys put the work in till it matters.
I am a little concerned by your naive comment that because he is good at maths he will do well at science.IME in the sciences Firstly there are a lot of facts to memorise and concepts to know, but also that candidates need to study mark schemes.The mark scheme often requires answers to be phrased in a very specific way.Answers may be correct and relevant, but if they don't get the buzz words, they don't get the marks

I agree. DS2 did his GSCE maths two years early and would have perfect scores on maths questions on science papers but wouldn't have precise definitions on the easy questions. Exam technique. Past papers. Mark schemes. Having a learning space or fucking up his mocks would make sod all difference.

2chocolateoranges · 31/12/2022 18:07

You can’t force him to study, you need to take a step back and hope that he puts the work in, if he doesn’t then he has to suffer the consequences of not gaining the results he wanted.

with both mine we researched the grades required for the courses they wanted to do, we talked about the importance of gaining these grades and the work required, the rest was on their shoulders as they need to want to gain the results.

AGoingConcern · 31/12/2022 20:31

You can’t make him study, but that’s ok. A huge part of why they take mocks is to identify study needs… often including showing them need to study at all.

Has he set out his plans/goals for post-GCSEs? He should be clear on what scores he’ll need to make those happen. The test scores are not the point & wont provide motivation on their own to many kids. Ask your DS (calmly, focusing on really listening not just finding an opportunity to make him do what you think he should) if he thinks he’s getting in the studying he thinks he needs to for mocks. If he says yes, let that be the answer - the mocks will give him feed back on if that was really true or not. If he says no, ask him why and work with him to help problem solve if needed. Your role in this case is to help him address a need he sees. Does he need help finding study strategies? Setting changes? Anxiety management strategies that aren’t procrastination?

Dacadactyl · 31/12/2022 20:34

In those circumstances I wouldn't worry at all tbh. You can't force him.

As long as his natural ability will help him get by and he won't mess them up, I wouldn't be concerned. He will probably come a cropper at a-level or degree level, but hopefully he will realise before then.

Spaghetti201 · 31/12/2022 20:35

I couldn’t be bothered to revise for my GCSE’s either…until my dad said he would give me £10 for every A I got…I got straight A*/A marks. Money deffo incentivised me.

JJ8765 · 31/12/2022 20:57

My boys were same and got their high expected grades with minimal revision. They always worked well in class and took the feedback and exam tips on board. They didn’t revise for mocks much outside what they did in school. It’s probably better he doesn’t get all 9’s now so he isn’t complacent for the real thing. Do try and get him to get his paperwork and files in good order so can recap quickly. Bright kids who are predicted 9’s across board don’t need revise much for GCSE. If the mocks are in 3 weeks he’s probably expecting the first two weeks of school to be revision anyway.

ISawFreeShips · 01/01/2023 01:08

Mine had a big blind spot about how to structure and plan her time. What looked like laziness was abject fear and anxiety, combined with drowning in homework which gave her the perfect reason/excuse not to start revising as such.

Not always the case of course, but I think it's easy to assume they have more executive function skills than they actually have. Especially this year group, who were in lockdown when they should have been spreading their wings a bit in Y8 and Y9.

TeenDivided · 01/01/2023 07:29

If you asked him now what grades we wants to get in his mocks & the real thing, what would he say?
What requirements does he have for his chosen courses for next year?
Is he ambitious? Does he understand that some unis will look at GCSE grades?
How will he feel on results day if his peers or people he thinks he is better than get 8s and 9s and he gets 6s & 7s?