Guilt over school commute

[Allotment123]

DS just started year 7 aged 11. Now has to get the bus to school. Could go to local school, this school is better. Buses been utterly rubbish, should be 40 minutes, 1 hour door to door. Today it took him almost 2 hours to get home. I feel so guilty but it is a much better school for him. When he's older he could cycle in less than an hour but all roads do not an option now. Do other parents have this guilt. He comes back so tired and grumpy

If it's usually an hour that's fine.

I grew up in rural area- secondary school was a 10 minute walk to bus, 35 minute bus, 10 minute bus, 5 minute walk. (About a 20 mile journey)

I had 'bus friends' who were from different year groups who I travelled with each day.

If it's occasionally 2 hours, well that's life. If it's regularly 2 hours, then maybe have a rethink.

It's meant that from age 11 I was confident catching buses/changing buses on my own. Far more independent than my own kids (I drive them as buses are too expensive)

Is there any way you can collect him or organise a car share? That is a very long commute.

It is too much. I don't think it is sustainable. I have a 45 minute drive to get DC to school and it is too much even. We are moving as it quickly became apparent it is just too far. We can at least do bits of homework as DC is young, and chat, but your son is just commuting. That would be a hideous commute for an adult, it is not ok for a child.

Poor lad. That sounds awful for him.

Does he have any local friends or classmates that make the same journey?

What when he wants to join after school clubs?

Mine went to the perfectly OK nearest comprehensive rather than the highly sought after school a bus ride and half hour walk away. Easy for clubs / music concerts etc, great for having local friends, good to be fresher for homework and have more tim to relax at home. The homework ramps up towards GCSE etc.

Where do his mates live ?

Loads of people will say it's fine. But I did a 45 min commute at 11 as it was a faith school. The problem was that all my mates were 45 in opposite direction. That's miserable. My kids walk ten min to a decent school. They do loads of clubs after and then cycle home.