2 questions from a rookie year 7 parent!

[seeker]

The first one is quite simple. How much help do you give with homework? My dd does hers in the living room - she occasionally asks questions which we sometimes answer but usually tell her how to find out the answer. If it's something interesting we might discuss it. When she's finished, if she wants me to, I cast an eye over it, and, for example,if she's divided 8 by 2 and got 2 I suggest she might have another look at number 7. I might read a draft story and suggest she expands an idea or checks the spelling. Very "light touch" or so I thought. I was talking to another parent who says that they should do their work on their own completely. His daughter goes to her room, does her work, packs her bag and her parents don't even check to see if she's done it all. WHo do you agree with?

Second. Yesterday dd had a special choir practice for an assembly first period. Music teacher said she would tell form tutor. DD missed science. She then got a stern note from science teacher saying that she should have come to excuse herself in person, they did a test and dd is to do the test this lunchtime. DD is upset that she did something wrong withoug realizing it, and upset that she'll miss her lunch and drama club. But I also see the teacher's point of view. What do you think? Bit harsh? Or is that what would happen at your school?

Seeker you are right, that is why I brought it up with her teacher. Like I say the answer I got is that is the way it is. I do thinks she sometimes panics and does everything on the night she gets it, but I think she is frightened of it backing up. It isn't just the one night that she has been doing homework this long. I'm hoping that it settles down a bit as the year goes on.

What we've done - and I know some people will think I'm getting too involved - is to make a put a list up on our pin board. Every time she gets a bit of homework, she writes it up on the list with when it's due in. That way she (and I) can keep an eye on it, and it doesn't back up. She alway has a blitz on Sunday afternoon so that she atarts the week with everything done, and everyhing crossed off - very satisfying!

I think that it's a bit hard to expect them to deal with all the organization necessary in year 7 without a bit of help - particularly if they went to a primary school where there wasn't much homework - and where they had much mote time to do it in.

My boys have a homework planner provided by the school. They have to write down their homework when they are given it and also write down the date when it is due in. As each piece is done, they either tick it or cross it off in their book. I check their books on a daily basis so that I have an idea of amounts and timescales.

They both have after-school activities and often ask to go to friends' for tea or have friends here. On those nights it is difficult for them to find the time for homework, so it's useful for me to know roughly what they have and when it's due so that I can say yes or no to the tea requests.

Seeker, Imo some support with homework as you describe is fine if the child wants or needs it and if they haven't been told specifically to do it on their own. I'm also sure they learn more if you do discuss it with them and it can help them with their own reviewing/checking strategies later to have some guidance on how to do it. One year 6 teacher I know strongly encourages parental help for this reason and felt there almost couldn't be too much. However, in year 7 they are at an age where they either have or are about to become increasingly independent, so don't be surprised if she wants less and less parental involvement in the near future (one of my dcs had a bit of help from me in year 7, the other none - their choice).

Freckle - dd's got a homework planner too, but somehow but it's sometimes quite difficult to work out what's in for when - particularly as it has lots of stuff about 2 pounds for DT, glace cherried for food tec and non uniform days in it as well! The list on the wall is easier for her to follow - and it can include things like music practice and write to Grandma as well.

I think the wall planner's a good idea. It's easy for both of you to see what needs to be done and when.

With 3 boys, I think a wall planner for us would quickly become too complicated so we stick with the homework planner and my diary!