Did you let your child pick which school they wanted?

[FifteenFluffyBunnies]

Who choose your child’s secondary school preferences? You or your child?
My child doesn’t want to go to the school I think would give him the best options for the future (School A). He very much wants to go to a different school which is good but doesn’t get as good results and doesn’t have the same range of academic subjects available (School B). He really wants to go to this particular school because it has a cadet force he is very interested in (and has always wanted a career in this area). It’s also a much smaller school. But it’s 10 miles away and we would need to move house to get him on the bus route.

However, we would also need to move house to get into School A, as we are about a mile outside the area you need to be to get a place, although we wouldn’t need to move as far and the move would put me nearer to work (but the house would be smaller as more expensive). Our nearest school is not an option. It’s results are shockingly bad.

Not sure which option would be best and whether I should just go with the school my son thinks he would prefer, after all he is the one that has to go to the school.

I remember my parents wouldn’t let me go to the school I wanted. They over ruled and forced me to attend a school I didn’t want to go to. Although as an adult I can see why they made that choice and perhaps they were right.

I would go for the school that suits best as a school, and he can do cadets at a free-standing cadet unit.

But I think you might be overspotimistic about being properly in your new place by the deadline. Just signing a lease might not be sufficient -you need to be actually living there and have changed all your admin to that address. Some councils are very hot on checking, especially if your move is within the borough as they check your council tax records and may look more closely at moves with suspicious timings.

Be aware that they do not have to prove you acted fraudulently, it is up to you to demonstrate that it is bona fide. So make sure your move is complete and you have totally surrendered old properly (even if breaking lease early costs you a bit)

I’m not sure at 10/11 kids have much of a clue when it comes to what career they want - they are kids! Yes he might stick to the army idea but hugely possible he wouldn’t. Nor is there any guarantee if he did that he would make it through the first year, many don’t.

DD currently wants to be a vet by day and West End star by night. She’s 12. Year 11 we will talk more about what she’d like to do and the A Levels she will need. I think that’s a more appropriate age.

I’d go for option A. Find a cadets out of school.

I would let my kids have some say in what secondary they went to, but I’d want them to choose from a selection of schools that I was happy with. So I’d not let them choose one that was awful but if there were two better ones they could choose their preference.
Anyway I’d definitely let him go to the cadets school. It’s lovely he has a passion in life and he would enjoy his school experience so much getting to do pursue that.

Think beyond schools. Which area do you want to live in long term? Which location offers you and your family what you need?

It sounds like either school is fine, so base the decision on your housing needs

B is looking like your best option at this stage. Check whether there are other contenders.

I would look at the results of school B over a few years, and also look at the progress 8 score.

If it's a smaller school, with only around 100 in each year, then the performance of one individual will have more effect on the results.

Say there's 100 in the year, you'd expect 43 to pass maths and english, but actually only 37 did. But maybe the year before 46 did? Making it more average than below average.