Anyone got a teen who reads?

[FreakStar]

My DD is 14 and used to be an avid and able reader. However, since starting secondary it's become increasingly difficult to get her to read until now she never reads at all. Not magazines, not online news, not books, nothing! I've bought her books for Christmas, I've taken her to the library and the bookshop where she's picked out some books, she's ordered books from Amazon but they all sit on the shelf untouched. We've tried backing off, we've tried scheduling it in, we take her devices away before bed in the hope she'll read in bed before she turns her light off etc. Her English teacher has recommended books and said she can borrow her copy, still no reading. So this morning I've told her I'd like her to spend time reading in the holiday which resulted in her crying and saying she'll fail her GCSEs if she has to read books and she doesn't enjoy reading and it's boring. DH and I both read, I don't understand how it can be boring if you are engrossed in a book. reading to me if knowledge and insight, and in my mind anyone who says reading is boring is usually uneducated. I don't want her to be one of those people who never reads. What can I do?

Would books of movies work eg divergent, hunger games, maze runner, the 100 etc help? Tbh I don’t think you can force it really. My DSs both read constantly so I can give recommendations but not sure how to get a teen to read if they just refuse. What books is she doing for gcse?

She read the hunger games when she was about 11, before she decided reading wasn't 'fun'. I don't think it's book recommendations she needs, she's always been good at picking her own books and knowing what appeals. I don't really know what the problem is- she hasn't always been like this.

Some people just don't like reading for pleasure. They just don't. Unfortunately she will have to read for GCSE - why oh why is English Literature compulsory? What are the books she chose? Maybe she's picked the 'wrong' genre. YA fiction goes through phases of what is popular. A couple of years back it was all dystopia fiction, before that those blimmin vampires, currently it all seems to be LGBT 'finding yourself' books. Did she pick something because it is one of the latest 'trendy' books but finds she just isn't getting on with that genre (i have never got on well with fantasy - even gave up on Harry Potter and Narnia). Did she read before? What did she enjoy then if she did?

I think.you have to chill. I love reading , but my teens do not. It is not the end of the world. There are other ways to be educated and learn. And I've learnt this after fretting throughout primary when they would do anything other than stick their nose in a chapter book, and the teachers were wound up about it as well. One did read- Deadly 60, Top Gear and a world atlas endlessly, but this wasn't 'reading'. I hate the whole thing about 'you must read, if you don't you are a poorer person for it'. If she feels forced to do it, she will not enjoy it. Imagine being told to do a pastime that you do not enjoy, especially when you are 14. She will, in time, find books to read that she will enjoy. But not in the current atmosphere. I know there will be others that will come on and stress the importance of being a reader, and the impact on comprehension, vocab and widening your language. I get that, but there are other ways kids learn this, not all learn best from the written page.

Audible. That’s been my answer.

Audio books. Don’t force it. She’s obviously a bright girl and understands the consequences.

I’d want a better argument than ‘boring’ though, if she means she’d rather be doing other things then she needs to say that.

Sadly there are plenty of young people who don’t read. One of my children had a tutor for English A level who said she’d met several candidates who didn’t want to read the set texts in their entirety.

Yeah, partly technology saps attention spans and makes reading mentally challenging, partly English literature GCSE ruins books.

My 14 yo was an avid reader, has stalled, but planning to start again over the holidays.
My 16yo hasn't read a book since 8 and has read five during lockdown - she's discovered psychology non fiction like the Optimism Bias. And started reading New Scientist. I would never have predicted she would be reading more than her sister.

Sounds like you need to give her a break tbh. Giving her those ultimatums will make her hate it more. Just because you enjoy something doesn't mean she should, even if it is good for her. So many people don't like reading for pleasure and they're not stupid. It takes a lot of effort to get engrossed in a book.

We have had the opposite here. Not much reading until lockdown - now a 15yo that does nothing else. I have no advice except have book around, talk about them etc.

Good think yours loved to read so she knows the pleasure of it. It’ll come back.

I have tried with my teen but I have realised it’s just not going to happen and it’s not something one can force! She is in a high set for English so not worried

I would just leave it. I don't like reading and neither do my children.

I never forced DD and DS to read - but both achieved 11A* at GCSE - including English Lit and English Lang. We're all Mathematicians though - perhaps your DD is too ? My nephew once took the Argos catalogue on holiday with him when his mother insisted he took a book - he now has a degree in Maths too !

A couple of people over the years have asked me to be part of their book club - I couldn't think of anything worse !

My 14yo reads loads. She was very loathe to read when she was 10-11 ish so I resorted to shameless bribery - if she could read more books than me over the summer, she got a Switch as I wasnt prepared to give her a device if it meant she would be even more reluctant to read. It gave her the bug and now she reads several books a week.

I could have written your OP almost word for word! Flatly refuses to read anything.
Has 2 younger siblings who won't stop reading... don't have any answers!

Mine used to read til he got an iphone. So did I tbh. Taking tech away is so punitive though, it won’t help.

I could understand it if she'd never been keen on reading, but feel frustrated that something she used to love seems to have been replaced with staring at instagram and snapchat for hours. She used to love fantasy books from the likes of Frances Hardinge and typical pr-teen fiction such Ruby Redfort, and Jaqueline Wilson. She used to read the usual teen fiction type romance/coming of age books until about 2 years ago. Recently she ordered The fault in our Stars with a voucher she was given but she hasn't touched it. The last book she read was The Curious incident of the dog in the Night. So quite varied tastes. She's started reading a Phillip Pullman book but not got any further than the first chapter. Maybe I'll leave it. Was thinking might see if she fancies Flowers in the Attic as I loved that at her age. She's coming up for 15.

Just remembered she was really into the Gone Series by Michael Gant- maybe I'll see if she's read them all and wants the next book if she hasn't.

I love reading but my children don't read, no point in me forcing them as it should be a pleasurable activity. They have their whole lives ahead of them to come to books and if they don't it's only their loss.

I'd leave her be

Which 'Gone' book did she get up to? There is a sequel trilogy that starts with 'Monster'.
But I also agree with the just leave her be for now idea. I love to read but last couples of years I had a real 'readers block' and could barely get past the first chapter of anything. I was trying all the genres and authors I like but nothing could grab me. Sometimes that just happens.
(I have done better for reading this year although I probably have covid to thank for that)

I've got one who reads loads and one who reads rarely. The non reader is into maths and physics at a level and doesn't like essays.

Agree with pp you're onto a loser if you try to insist on reading.

I'm actually worried that my 14 year old DS is addicted at the moment. He reads web serials on his tablet for hours a day. Mostly sci-fi I think. He excels at maths and science at school but he is average at English, so I don't think maths and reading are mutually exclusive. He is fussy about what he reads though and has had times when he hasn't read much for a while.

My dd is 19 and a massive massive reader (Eng lit at uni) but she wasn't always. She thinks she didn't like the books she had...aged 12 she found Percy Jackson and then went from there.

She loves YA but Aldi things like JanecAusten and The Secret History. She says what does yr dd like - what tv shows or films? - and she'll recommend.

haha sorry also, not Aldi!

How academic is her school? If she's talking about failing GCSEs, I'd wonder if they are piling on the pressure of "how important" the exams are and making her feel like she doesn't have time to read. Of course it could just be an excuse. I'd see if you can get her into audiobooks to try and remind her of the magic of being drawn in by a story. If she remembers she may be motivated to pick up physical books again. Maybe try something like Emily Barr's YA novels. Interesting female lead characters and page turning plots.

I've got a 14 year old DD who used to read lots at primary then barely picked up a book for years. I've just left her to it as I was forced to read and read but have never read a book out of choice since 16. She's just started again but with Audible and its based on her interests. She reads some online news. About once every 6 months I ask her if she wants me to buy her books and if its no I leave it.

I have a 13 year DS with ASD, very mathmatical, absolutely hates reading but he lets me read lots of news articles to him and we discuss them. He has a strong preference for factual and short - I get Bloomberg Quicktake on Twitter and BBC / CNN and go through a few each day with him.

Not sure what the best approach is here but DD has gone with Audible. If she's crying and that stressed I would ease up on mentioning it, lots of intelligent people don't read books. Those that don't normally short articles are easier on news / topics interested in.

Think of it as a phase, rather than a life long dislike of reading. My daughter was the same when she was in Year 7/8, didn’t read at all for over a year. It came back eventually.