The old private v state - we have to choose!!

[Miladymilord]

If your dd (year 8) was at a good local comprehensive school but had been offered a scholarship and bursary to a good local independent school, what would you do?

She's extremely sporty (hence scholarship and bursary).

But she's lovely!! She's so calm and kind and tolerant of all kinds of people. She has loads of friends. She's on the school council and she's bright and confident. She likes the boys and they like her. She finishes early (3). Teachers really seem to like her. She's making good academic progress. I don't want her to change!

Indie is single sex, competitive and results are far better as much as you can compare. Sport is very good. It's mainly boarding but they have a few day who integrate well (a day girl is currently deputy head). It's pretty posh. Huge amounts of extra curricular. Staff seem very happy and smiley. Girls too, although I know there's a few wild ones, loads of smoking by year 11 (I have a friend with a dd there).

I don't know what to do!!

Dd wants to go but has reservations, probably because I am in two minds. Dh is in doubt private school but is a bit worried about the (tiny!) cost.

Help!

Locally to us, the private schools dominate all the performance sports centres. They just play much more hockey, netball etc in school and generally have expert coaches rather than a general PE teacher so the air students just get much better. I think there are also some statistics which said the majority of Olympians went to private school but I may be wrong.

Near me it would depend on the Sport as to which would be best for a talented sporty girl.
State school plus local clubs would be just as good/better for most sports and DC's state school has produced a number of Olympians, so has proved its flexibility.
BUT if you were a girl interested in either: a) a less played team sport or b) a less common individual sport or possibly c) swimming then one particular local private girl's school could be a better choice.
But only really for those sports, and if you were interested in other team sports you might be worse off.
It also wouldn't necessarily mean you didn't need an external club as well later. (So you might still be doing 5am sessions at the public pool.)

I don’t think you should have gone down this route unless you intended to move her. It’s very unfair to now be having wobbles.

My twopenneth:

Teenagers being happy. I would not underestimate the importance of this, it’s actually quite rare. It sounds like she’s doing really well at her current school. You might upset the Applecart so important to have clear reasons for doing so.

Sport at some private schools is immense. If she has sporting ambitions (ie career ones) then it’s worth considering.

What does she want? Make sure she’s thought it all through. As you’ve put her through the process then it should now be her decision.

The private school wiillhave selected through wealth and social advantage at a minimum. So very difficult to compare academic outcomes. 25% 7/8/9 at a comp is very good.

I think the opportunities DD will have at an independent/boarding school will be in a different league to a comp regardless of how good that school might be. The class sizes, facilities, etc will be greater and our experience of DDs at boarding school is that they are stimulated and encouraged way more. The independent sector simply is more adept at getting its pupils to the front of the queue in life and, in this day and age, that really matters.

The academic record of the private school is something to factor in. But, friendship is the most important thing. If she has is happy and successful where she is then only move if it’s what she wants