Will not doing A'levels hinder DS long term?

[MrsJamieFraser2]

My son received his GCSE results last week, and whilst he did very well, he didn't do well enough to get back into the 6th form at his selective grammar school.

He's adamant he's not doing any further education, i.e. not joining another school or college. He's very bright, just lazy! He's looking at apprenticeships, but I feel he will ultimately do better if he had a'levels. Even going into an apprenticeship at 18 and not going to university.

I'm torn between him going into an apprenticeship now and he perhaps doesn't achieve his full potential, or trying to speak to the school again regarding mitigating circumstances which didn't help him over the last 9 months.

Any advice would be much appreciated!

I’m really impressed he’s got enough get up and go to write those articles. I would seriously be encouraging him to persue that. Even in his spare time. What about the sports BTEC and maybe something media based to bring another outlet for his interest...he could become a sports presenter...radio? The Richard Hammond of sport! He’s REALLY lucky he has a direction...maybe he just needs a bit of steering to get him going...he may be feeling a bit rudderless after his results but really I can’t stress enough how impressed I am that he’s done what he has!

Meaning maybe a media BTEC

If he was looking at PE and Business at A level I would have thought a good BTEC course might offer quite attractive options. If he was into sport, did he play in a school team or anything? If so what active sports engagement chances do other schools/colleges offer? That might be an argument for more study rather than apprenticeship..

@bionicnemonic I'm going to show him your message!

I am proud of him, his vocabulary is so mature for his age. Admittedly it's about football but hey ho. We bought a domain name as he was going to start a sports blog but that hadn't happened. That's what concerns me, he's apathetic and a bit lazy (until it comes to his writing) and working a 40 hour week is really hard!

@elkiedee He plays rugby, cricket and football both in school and for local teams too. The more I read about it, sports/business btec sounds perfect for him.

My Dc got just good enough grades to do A levels at his school sixth form- but not in the subjects he wanted to. He is a lazy fucker doesn't really enjoy studying.... so we both couldn't see the point of him doing A levels in subjects he didn't really like, just for the sake of it.
He's ended up signing up at the local FE college for 2 science BTECs (vocational, equiv to A levels - tho not accepted by all Unis) plus one A level.
Your son could do a mix of academic and vocational, the sport science BTECs and say A level Eng Lang/ Lit for his writing????
He'll need to find an apprenticeship pretty fast otherwise.... and often 16 year olds are limited geographically and financially if they can't travel or afford to move away.

You should not be scared of an apprenticeship, especially in an area he wants to work in. If he loves it he will do well, and get the experience and contacts he needs. If he does not like it then the experience may help him work out what he does want and how to get there.

I think we all focus on the exam factory that is modern education, and forget about the kids. Good people are good, whether or not they have qualifications, and everyone is good at something they like doing. Follow what you like to do, and if that is an apprenticeship that sounds great.

And by the way, I think all mums think their teenage sons are lazy. I am not sure if they all are, or just whether mums think they are.

The college was happy for him to combine 2 BTECs with an A level, but they strongly recommended doing the 2 BTECs in the same subject

Thank you everyone. He's always struggled with self confidence and this is the final straw I guess. He's not looking at this objectively but rather a case of needing to do something so apply for anything. As far as he is concerned he's clearly not bright enough for a'levels so that's it.

But he's bright, kind, articulate. Just not particularly academic and is a lazy arse must of the time!

www.bbc.co.uk/careers/trainee-schemes-and-apprenticeships

www.itvjobs.com/workinghere/entry-careers/apprenticeship-programme/

www.sportsjournalists.co.uk/training/work-experience/

www.mediargh.com/journalism-apprenticeships-sky-sports-london/
Not read these but something might spark. Too late for the Sky one but maybe worth thinking about for future.

@bionicnemonic That's brilliant! Thank you.

The school sound crap. I hate reading/hearing about lack of support from very academic schools. What rubbish they are.

It reads to me like you would be holding him back to deter him from an apprenticeship. You'd be trying to put him on a path that isn't going to work for him now, and maybe never. Let him find value in the very many other things he could excel at.

ps: but you're lucky if you find interesting apprenticeships in your area. Most of our local ones seem dire, and higher apprenticeships are almost non-existent within 20 miles. I can't even find a broad range of BTECs. I may have similar problems to OP, with my own DS in a few yrs.

Having just gone through A levels with DD I would suggest a rethink about A levels with those grades.

DD did A levels in subjects that she achieved A* in and struggled at first. The students with B and C grade GCSEs really struggled and quite a few didn't finish their courses.

I'm not surprised his grammar school isn't giving him much support. They probably are more interested in pupils who got 8 and 9s at GCSE and are predicted good A Level grades. Keeps their stats looking good.

Have you looked at Sky? I seem to remember they had training opportunities for young people? Haven't RTFT so apologies if this has been mentioned already.

My eldest DD got similar GCSEs ( in the day when they were letters not numbers!) and went on to do A levels. I didn't buy think she was academic enough and upsurge enough failed her AS exams spectacularly. I have her the choice of doing a BTeC, are getting a job. (No apprentices then). She moaned about it, but agreed to go to college for a BTeC. It was the making of her. She got distinctions across the board, and a place at Uni, she got a 2:2 degree, and a temp job in a small start up company. That business is now massive, she is head of HR earning more than twice my salary (and I earns plenty)
My youngest DD got all A and A GCSEs , stayed in to 6th form, got all A A levels, went to Uni, got a 2:1 degree and is now doing a graduate trainee contract with one of the big 4 accountancy firms.

Not everyone can do the same thing. Your boy has had a huge confidence knock. His GCSE results aren't brilliant which is why his grammar school don't want him for 6th form. He may well affect their performance in the league tables. Shame on them! Once he has dusted himself down, tell him that whatever he does is ok with you, but doing nothing isn't an option. You never know, getting a job in McDonalds as a temporary stop gap for a year may be the making of him! If he's forced into something he absolutely doesn't want to do, it will have a massive impact on him. He's 16, just starting in life. Most kids at his age are not yet able to make big decisions about their future.

Bagel is right. DD's school "managed" out the students that they thought would fail any A level subjects. They then proudly announced their 100% pass rate

bagel Yoy are spot on about the grammar school not giving support. My experience with two DS going through the grammar system has been awful. As neither boy was a high achiever they were forgotten and neglected. All attention goes to the clever chaps. Anyone not considering university is a waste of the school's time and effort. With hindsight my boys should never have gone. Their confidence is in tatters.

You're all completely right about the school. They only focus on those that got 8s and 9s. Only focus on the ones going to Oxbridge/Durham/Exeter. It's very sad as he has so much to offer.

His confidence is in tatters but has been for a while at the school. As a PP said, I question if it was the right move for him going to that school. But the alternative was at the secondary with boys that had bullied him at primary school.

I'm really not trying to push him I to doing anything, I just want what I perceive is the best for him long term. And short term.

@OnlyTheDepthVaries You're right! If you're doing well, or doing poorly then you are focused on. Otherwise you just get left. The Head said he had been on their radar since year 9 regarding needing additional educational support. But no one told me!

Is it not the case now you need to either be in full time education or be doing a traineeship/apprenticeship or working and also in part time education now until you're 18?

So I think he needs to keep education as his back up option if he doesn't actually get an apprenticeship or the right apprenticeship. As such, he needs to register somewhere I think?

I think where DCs have not put the effort in, the schools probably feel they cannot do much more to help. I don’t think the lack of A levels will be a huge hindrance, especially not at a possible D grade level, however the biggest hindrance he’s got is his attitude.

Whatever talent you have, employers spot a lazy so and so a mile off. They will wonder why it all went wrong and will expect him to knuckle down if they offer anything to him. He seems immature and I would suggest the BTec route too. He won’t be better then anyone doing any course if he doesn’t work and is perceived as lazy. Perhaps his results will wake him up?

MrsJamie sounds exactly the same as my experience. By chance are you in a seaside town on the south coast?
Meanwhile, although it has taken a few years my older DS is now doing well. He has even excelled in a summer holiday job. It is this that is giving me hope for my younger DS who is struggling with confidence and attitude and laziness.
As I said....hindsight......

My cocky ds underperformed at GCSE and ended up going to a new school for y12. He was embarrassed but made friends quickly and is due to do A-levels next summer. I don't know if he admits the change of school is due to academic performance but I suspect he probably tells people that he wanted a change of scene after 5 years. He has no idea about career so apprenticeships were not right for him. For university, he's going to pick the A level that he's best at as he doesn't know what he likes.

My younger DB was ‘invited to leave’ 6th form after truanting for 6 weeks before anyone thought to ring my mum (it was the 80’s). He did ok but not spectacularly at GCSE.
He just needed to grow up I think. After around 5 years working in pubs and on building sites he announced he was going to go to University so went to college, did a BTEC, got into Uni...., long story short is now an executive director for a huge international construction company.
I was a studious pupil, worked hard, did A levels in arts subjects , have degrees and postgrad quals and have achieved nowhere near the career success that he has . But he’s lovely and I’m very proud of him.

On laziness question, surely being in school and other sports teams must take time, effort and commitment? And all the stuff about teamwork.

I think it's so sad that the current system encourages some schools to only look at high grades and high status universities.