Anyone else’s dc beginning to really struggle with the demands of gcse prep?

[IllBeAtTheBarIfYouNeedMe]

Just that really. It’s the home stretch and dd is so close to actually breaking from the demands on her. Last night she was wondering around the house dazed and teary eyed just waiting for her db’s just to breathe in her direction so she can jump down their throats. She’s exhausted.

Her school has had her at school from 7:30am until 5:10pm mon-fri and 9-3 on saturdays since September. They want her in over the easter holidays too according to the schedule I’ve received. She’s revising at home all evening and at weekends so it just seems to be completely non stop for her at the moment.

She’s predicted to do well and I really don’t want her to fail because she just overwhelmed by it all and/or burnt out.

I’ve booked her a trip with a few of her friends to go and see another friend of theirs who lives by the coast for a few day this weekend so I’m hoping that it will give her a breather and she’ll come back more relaxed and ready for the last bit before GCSEs.

Or am I just being ridiculous? How is everyone else helping their teens?

In Scotland here, but my eldest is having a horrible time in the run up to her nationals.

She had her first one yesterday. She suffers with anxiety and she phoned me mid-panic attack it was awful! I had to phone her year head to find her and calm her down.

Dd is very bright and expected to do well too, but she is under so much pressure it's really awful.
She is the same with her siblings too I've never had them fight so much, everything is getting to her and she is so teary at every little thing.
I've had to tell dd to stop studying at points as she's been burning out and making herself ill.

The trip you've booked for your dd sounds great, and hopefully just what she needs.
You're certainly not being ridiculous, I wish they covered this in the parenting mags

DS2's school does not do extra revision sessions outside of normal school hours, but the timetable he sets himself is excessive. He has ASD, and once he sets himself a schedule, he sticks to it come hell or high water.

He started doing an hour of revision each day on top of set homework in April of Y10, he has not taken a single day off since then. He revised on Christmas Day. He revised on his 16th birthday. When his mocks finished, he refused to take a day off, and continued revising the next day.

Every time a teacher says "make sure you do half an hour of X each day" he takes that literally and adds it on top of what he is already doing, so it is now more like two hours a day (more on weekends and school holidays). By the time the exams arrive, he will have done over 1000 hours of extra studying on top of school work.

He is also preparing for the Grade 8 music exam that he is insisting on taking this summer.

And I've got one doing A-levels as well, to add to the joy.

Her school has had her at school from 7:30am until 5:10pm mon-fri and 9-3 on saturdays since September.

That would be a long work week for an adult. There must be a point at which extra hours of school become counterproductive.

Does the school really think that kind of timetable is reasonable? Are they playing catch up with some missed curriculum? If the Saturdays are optional I would suggest to her that she revise at her leisure at home.

DS's school makes the library open across Easter so there is a quiet place with resources available but no-one has to go in and there is no teaching. DT students can access workshop too.

Faintline- it really is tough on them. They seem to be pulled in so many directions which each subject (understandably) claiming that theirs is the most important that the kids seem to not know wether they’re coming or going. They just want to do well and haven’t figured out yet how to manage the demands on them or at least that’s what I tell myself to cope with the constant refereeing I’m having to do

TheSecond- It really is a long week. I can imagine the teachers are feeling much like the children are

Both of my ds’s have asd so I have that joy next whilst dd will be doing her a levels. I suspect that ds1 will either be all (like your ds) or nothing (nor likely as he compartmentalises school and home and it’s already a stress just to get him to do homework).

I wish both of your dc the very best and hope it’ll be worth it come August

Inspired - they impress on the parents quite heavily that the dc should attend but they tell the dc that they will come to their homes and take them from their beds if necessary. I’ve dared them to try this one weekend when dd was suffering with a horrific bug but they did turn up so it’s obviously just a way they strong arm the kids to attend the extra day.

The school was taken over by a new academy last September and I think they’re over keen to make an immediate impact in the community. Given that gcse grades were already improving over the past 5 years will have no bearing im sure when these lot, hopefully, do well come the summer.

*didnt turn up

Illbe if i was in your position and my DC was perfectly capable of revising on their own then I would be phoning the school on a regular basis saying she is off ill, her mental health is far more important than the schools stats!!! After all if she wants to do A levels then she needs to be self motivated all this pressure and spoon feeding from the school does no-one any good.

DS who is also in Y11 may not be at the perfect school but they are excellent at putting minimal pressure on the kids, extra sessions are on a voluntary basis only and certainly nothing going on over the Easter Holidays.

Her school has had her at school from 7:30am until 5:10pm mon-fri and 9-3 on saturdays since September.

Is this a private school?
Those hours are cruel! These are children. Why are you letting her get burnt out?

The normal school day has always been plenty of time for passing GCSEs and A Levels. As a parent, I’d be sending her at normal times, not Saturday mornings and not in the holidays...other than for perhaps one session of revision .

I have to say we have a lot less pressure - the school did nag them a lot for mocks and there have been a lot of after/school and Saturday morning revision sessions but very little compulsory stuff. We have voluntary revision classes in the second week of Easter over 4 days but some are aimed at specific groups.

The school cannot surely ethically or legally make them study for 10 hr days, plus weekends?

If it’s a mainstream secondary, I’m thinking that perhaps they’re way behind on finishing course content.

Or its an academy trying to make a name for itself, I'm shocked at their tactics to be honest, zero concern for the poor DC!

It is a mainstream state secondary. My thought was that maybe they were behind on the content but the change to the longer school days from year 10 are apparently permanent. They have staff on the gate that physically stop the older years leaving on those three longer days.

The morning sessions (7:30 until school normal start of 8:20) are optional. Obviously at the weekends and in holidays they can’t make them go to school. But the weekday afternoon sessions, they make it impossible for anyone to leave.

I’ve tried to be led by my dd as in how much she wants to do. So far she has opted in to the early mornings and most of the weekends/holidays. But she does need a taper now.

I should also clarify that the days were they haven’t extended the school times, the older kids have to show their revision schedules to the gate staff to be allowed to leave earlier.

Has there been no parent backlash at this change of regime or was in voted in by the parents. I saw something recently on the telly about long working hours did not equate to higher productivity infact the opposite, I would imagine absenteeism has rocketed!

The pressure of increased course content, less/no coursework and performance related pay is really being passed on to our children now. Being bright and doing a reasonable amount of revision is no longer enough to do well.

Dd is at school right through the Easter hols apart from the bank holidays and weekends. She's then too tired to do more at home but she knows it's a means to an end and will be over soon. I'm planning a lot of treats over the summer.

Illbe that's crazy

I wouldn't be surprised if a good number were off sick with those demands (pupils and teachers)

Reading these threads is making me more relaxed about dds approach. She's fairly chilled. Working hard at school but bare minimum at home. She's likely to get a spread of grades 5-8 with a fighting chance of a 9 in maths on a good day. She missed it by 5 marks in her most recent mock.

She's quite bright and could probably manage 7 and above for everything if she worked all hours but she doesn't see the point and I'm inclined to agree with her.

Unfortunately I seem to be the only one who has raised concerns. I was told that there were other schools in the borough if I disapproved of the (completely in-consultated) changes. Because moving your dc between year 10 and 11 is exactly what every parent wants to do.

I hope she's not staying on for 6th form, I'd imagine you wouldn't see her for 2 years.

Lol no. She’s decided that she wants out from there and wants to go to the Channel Islands to do sixth form. I think that’s why she’s going along with so much as she really doesn’t want to have to stay there

op whether or not the academy says that, I’ve just read this briefing paper researchbriefings.files.parliament.uk/documents/SN07148/SN07148.pdf
And nowhere, that I can see, mentions actually studying during longer set days; only schools with longer hours providing extra curricular activities.

Does the school factor in another snack break before 17:10?
Or breakfast etc?

A year ago my son did GCSEs and got really stressed around Easter.

School put a lot of pressure on him and he worked similar hours on his revision.

I took him away to the seaside for 3 days, without any books and revision notes. We spent many hours walking along the coast path and had conversations about expectations, pressure, resilience etc.

It really helped him to take a step back. He did really well in his GCSEs.

Sometimes parents need to step in if the school tries to push up their results on the league tables without a thought about students’ wellbeing.

My DCs very high achieving school is nothing like this. There are optional after school sessions if you want them, but I don't think any in the Easter vacation.
And lots of sessions on stress reduction and mental health.

That's just what it takes in terms of hours and commitment, to do well.

Those school hours are long, but it's just what it takes. Ditto revising in the holidays. It's just what it takes.

I would check teens are studying "smart" rather than just blindly reading and rewriting notes. But this level of commitment is just what it is.

FWIW, my teen is working 6 hours a day minimum through the holidays and she isn't even taking exams this year.