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Secondary education

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Original poster

DC attacked at school, again

127 replies

Jessia0 · 19/10/2016 21:33

In school today, right in front of teacher my DD was physically assaulted. I am talking full on closed fist pounding to the face. My DC was knocked to the ground injured ... Facts not in dispute, it was right in front of teacher but she was to afraid to intervene in case she got hit.

One day exclusion, he is probably quite happy with that. But this is the second physical assault in a year from same boy and after half term he will be back in class. I asked for boy to be moved to a different class last time and he wasn't, now it's GCSE year so they are not keen to move him.

My DC was really affected first time (there was a few attacks from other kids as well) but this time she is ok about it, just seems to accept this is what bigger kids do to smaller kids and there is nothing school can do.

Any advice?

OP posts:
Original poster
Jessia0 · 19/10/2016 23:01

the head of safeguarding is the deputy in the same school

OP posts:
Astro55 · 19/10/2016 23:03

The school may have their hands tied and may well thank you for involving the police - as people have said they have a liaison officer - they do not want to crimilise children but the law and any agencies can work with the child's family and get him the help he needs or removed from the school - it's not a bad thing

pieceofpurplesky · 19/10/2016 23:05

Have a read of this - page 4/5. Bullying is covered by safeguarding

https://www.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachmentdata/file/444862/Preventinggandtacklinggbullying_advice.pdf

Original poster
Jessia0 · 19/10/2016 23:08

yes nobel & pieceofpurplesky that's what is worrying me, I have been told the DC has behaviour issues (SEN?) but have no way to actually know if he does as if I even care. Also told by school they probably can't exclude him as hitting another pupil repeatedly on more than one occasion is not that serious because he was excluded for a fixed term, I am paraphrasing.

And whilst my DD wouldn't be excluded if I bring police into it, just watch what happens to their GCSEs if I do, (that is my worry, no one said that). I will admit my DD is a bit of a wimp and physically very weak.

OP posts:
Astro55 · 19/10/2016 23:08

There should be a safeguarding officer at the LA you can chat too - you don't need to make a complaint - ring up for a chat and ask for some advise - it works wonders

Original poster
Jessia0 · 19/10/2016 23:11

This probably seems a stupid question, but I honestly dont know. Is it bullying if its three physical assaults in two years (in school) as opposed to constant daily incidents?

OP posts:
Original poster
Jessia0 · 19/10/2016 23:12

LA aren't interested, tried that last time, school is an academy.

OP posts:
PonderingProsecco · 19/10/2016 23:13

Being assaulted not your dd fault.
Being 'weak' no excuse for bully.
If SEN school need to make sure pupil supported so does not assault.
If they can't his educational provision should be changed.

NicknameUsed · 19/10/2016 23:13

Please be assertive and deal with this.
Not dealing with it is far more likely to affect her GCSEs. The school are failing your daughter.

Chippednailvarnishing · 19/10/2016 23:15

You're not sounding like you have much empathy for your DD.
Weak and a wimp?

pieceofpurplesky · 19/10/2016 23:15

Most of the staff in the school would probably be glad to see the back of him too.

Original poster
Jessia0 · 19/10/2016 23:20

Sorry if I dont sound very assertive, I do try but after years of experience of schools with other children I know you never get anywhere acting like a bull in a China shop. If I have to ring police I will, am very close to doing so. And MN comments have helped me think it through. Just want to know everything I need to know before I take drastic action and dont want to sound like a helicopter mum.

OP posts:
Jessia0 · 19/10/2016 23:22

This reply has been deleted

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worrierandwine · 19/10/2016 23:26

Assault, police for definite, your daughters GCSE year is already being affected and she may be putting on a brave face for you. I was too afraid to tell my parents I was being bullied until I was beaten up in the street and school asked me then if I wanted to involve police and that was 20 years ago so sounds like your DD's school are failing in their care of your daughter. Even if it meant my daughter re-sitting her exams I would sooner that than have her in danger of being repeatedly assaulted! I'm afraid I see children's safety more important than their education.

IhatchedaSnorlax · 19/10/2016 23:31

Oh Op, I'm so sorry to read this, but given the history & the school seemingly unable to stop this, surely you need to go to the police & stand up for your DD. She needs you to stop him physically assaulting her.

Amandahugandkisses · 19/10/2016 23:33

Your poor DD. No one to protect her. This is psychologically damaging for her OP as well as physical risk.
Please contact the police.
Of course she is physically weak against an older boy poor wee might!

WhoKnewSeamus · 19/10/2016 23:39

I'm struggling to understand why you don't want to call the police tbh, 3 physical assaults in 2 years and you're wondering if it's bullying??
It's 3 physical attacks on your DD ffs, pull your head out your arse and call the police!

LifeIsGoodish · 20/10/2016 00:07

Multiple assaults, accepting that she will be assaulted, and accepting that her mum won't protect her, and you're worrying that actually doing something will harm her GCSEs?

Confused

I'm sorry, but you have got it totally arse-about-face. If you let things continue as they are, your dd's GCSEs will be affected as will her self-esteem and her trust in you.

Get the police involved immediately. Don't wait for the school to fail your dd again! What are you expecting them to do? Exclude her because you called the police?

If the other child has SEN which they cannot manage, then evidence of police involvement may help them obtain what he needs to cope in mainstream, or help him to obtain a move to a Special School where he will be better able to access education.

Original poster
Jessia0 · 20/10/2016 00:07

I'm struggling to understand why you don't want to call the police
I am just unaware of the consequences and have suspicions that I will be told its a school matter. it feels like it should be a last resort (which it might be) and I don't feel like I have a lot of options/schools at the moment. I am considering it, will be on schools case tomorrow first thing and see if they have anything new to say before I make decision. Will update asap, off to bed now. Thanks for all the comments have helped me focus on what to do.

OP posts:
OddBoots · 20/10/2016 07:21

You don't need to worry about schools and options, calling the police about this makes no difference at all to the education of your child. This page gives some good advice about the law surrounding exclusion and it is very clear that your child cannot be excluded for a non-disciplinary reason or the action of their parents.

I don't work for the police but I am a secondary school governor who has taken exclusion training and sat on several exclusion panels for longer fixed term and permanent exclusions - it is one of the worst bits of my role but is essential.

From my perspective I think reporting the assault to the police would be helpful, the police should not tell you that it is a school matter, the law is the law wherever you are whether this happened in the supermarket or on the street or at school it is the same.

The other child may or may not have special educational needs but that is for the school to assess and to get the appropriate support, that doesn't mean that the child is allowed to seriously harm the education and welfare of other students or other people in the school.

If the school have not properly assessed and met the needs of the other child then they may not be able to permanently exclude the other child for this but a police reported incident that has resulted in a fixed term exclusion should indicate that this is a child at risk of permanent exclusion so they should be doing all they can to get things sorted. They won't be able to tell you what has or has not been done but they should be able to tell you if they have put things in place to try to keep your child safe.

CurbsideProphet · 20/10/2016 07:34

I work at a school and am surprised that you haven't called the police tbh. As a pp said, there will be a Liason Officer for the school. This sounds awful, but considering that boy has violently assaulted her at school in front of a teacher, should there be concerns that she could be targeted outside school?

The school is not dealing with the violent outbursts of this boy. They are an Academy and not answerable to the LA. Clearly the only option is to contact the Police for advice.

manhowdy · 20/10/2016 07:55

A punch to the face can kill. I would be calling the police no question and insisting the boy is arrested.

Is your DD happy at school generally? Does she have friends? Or does she go in each day in fear?

Depdnding on the answerst, right now I would be considering taking her out and exploring other options re GCSEs. Even if it meant delaying them, I wouldn't risk exposure to more violence.

Really feel for you OP, what a horrible thing to happen Flowers Please involve the police and update us on the outcome.

OutDamnedWind · 20/10/2016 07:57

I am really quite shocked at your response to this, but understand there's an element of shock and feeling helpless.

Phone the police. Your DD has been assaulted. What would you do if someone punched you in the face, hard enough to knock you to the ground? He did it directly in front of a teacher - of course your DD doesn't feel safe!

There really can't be any repercussions from school for your DD. Though how is she going to study well for her GCSEs if she's constantly watching over her shoulder?

Twatty · 20/10/2016 08:18

Jessia0 I have called the police before, for an assault at school on my dc.

They take it very seriously you will not be fobbed off. Please ring them.

Three assaults Shock don't let it be any more.

midnightlurker · 20/10/2016 08:32

Your DD's GCSEs will not be affected by you arguing with school, calling the police or anything else. They are an external exam that the school is also measured by. What will harm her GCSEs is doing nothing. Children cannot learn if they do not feel safe. Leave things as they are and she will not fulfil her potential. If they won't move the boy, can they move her to a different class? She must not stay with him.

Even worse than GCSE grades is the fact that she is starting to see this as ok. In her adult life, if she has a partner who hits her, wouldn't you want her to know that is wrong? Wouldn't you want her to know to escape, to report to the Police and stand up for herself?