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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

GCSE Results thread and starting 6th form

1000 replies

WitchofScots · 16/08/2015 11:04

Follow on thread from the GCSE exams and proms thread. For hand holding and recommendations of wine/chocolate/biscuits to get through the post results stuff.

OP posts:
HSMMaCM · 10/09/2015 22:25

Yes. Apparently btm, but she hasn't told me and I'm not sure even she knows???

The only thing her tutor said was, "she seemed upset this morning". DD says she has no idea what she means Confused

SugarPlumTree · 11/09/2015 07:59

Thank you for the sympathy Smile The Middle School had a culture of low level bullying under the previous head and DD had a rough time - not helped that some teacher records containing medical info amongst other bits were read by some girls in the class. She has come on a huge amount since then but I coukd see the panic in her face as she came in last night and am not prepared to let her get back to that. Don't know what is wrong with DS, he says he hates everyone apart from 2 people. DH and I had a long talk and we are going to look at moving next year, we don't feel it is working here for either of out children and time for a fresh start.

Sorry to hear your DD is worried BTM. Maybe a good thing it is the weekend, a couple of days a way to rest a bit. It all seems harder when they are shattered.

Eve, glad he has got sorted, hope he is happier with new combination.

HSM glad you have got to the bottom of which A levels working which way. Eek at predicted grades !

DD should actually have 4 lessons of media today I think so will have a better idea of if she wants to stay. Don't want to leave ig too long before switching her back to school if she is going to as she'll have to catch up, but want to give ig a fair chance. If she wants to stay we'll have to review the travel.

SheGotAllDaMoves · 11/09/2015 08:05

getoff I don't know about the specific entry requirements for medicine but there are lots of threads about it. Probably in the Higher Education topic? I bet there's lots of good advice ( though obviously one shouldn't treat as gospel ).

sugar that is really shittySad. I don't know what to suggest.

TeenAndTween · 11/09/2015 08:33

Sugar Oh no! Can you / she contact pastoral support? DD has checked it out already, and they also have a room to go to if everything gets too much. I would hope the college would stamp down very hard on any kind of bullying behaviour. That's disgraceful, they're meant to be young adults!

Draylon · 11/09/2015 09:13

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

getoffthattabletnow · 11/09/2015 09:23

SugarPlum theres nothing more upsetting than unhappy children - sympathies.Maybe your ds is just a bit overwhelmed and needs time to settle down.As long as he has friends thats the important thing.Your poor dd has had a really rough trot through school.It must be difficult to be rational and not to make snap decisions in this sort of situation.Best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

Idefix we're lucky round here that we have a choice of schools.One of mine is Dyslexic and needs small class sizes.3 days in he seems happy in his new school luckily.His sister is not quite so happy however and is really missing her old friends.

ShesGotAllDaMoves dd's school has only this year started to advise this due to the A level changes.There are a network of Gdst schools in the country and they normally do well in the league tables,so i assume they know what they are talking about.Apparently universities want 3 good grades of A or A* only for Medicine rather than 4 not so good ones.Her school do well at achieving Medical University Entrance traditionally.But i still worry that she might be competing against students with 4/5 A levels.

TeenAndTween · 11/09/2015 10:19

Draylon regarding DofE.

DD started Silver in y11, but just did the volunteering. This year she is planning to use her enrichment as the physical, and also do the skill. That will only leave the expedition section to be done (or not) another time.

Could your DS do similar?

bigTillyMint · 11/09/2015 11:15

Teen, glad to hear your sixth form has a room they can go to. This seems to be a problem at the one DD has started atConfused
And they don't do enrichmentEnvy

SugarPlum, sorry to hear all that - do you think your DS is a bit overwhelmed by the transition and will settle after a while? What is their pastoral support like? I have to say that DD's old school supported her really well, but she did become a bit dependent on it, so it's hard to try to manage on her own.

Draylon, it's good that your DS is keen to give it his all at school and is putting all that effort in with his maths, but you're right - he does need some down-time. Do you think he will get to working smarter (ie quicker but still effectively) over time?

SheGotAllDaMoves · 11/09/2015 11:16

getoff always a bit hard to be the guinea pig year. But if you have liked and trusted the school to date, then no reason not to trust them on this now?

Draylon · 11/09/2015 13:13

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TeenAndTween · 11/09/2015 13:26

Draylon No not PS, DD has gone to Brock, I'm hanging out now mainly on a General BTEC thread I started, but still popping in here too as she is doing BTEC plus and AS.

She did her volunteering at a primary after school club (was toying with Childcare at the time and I was (successfully) trying to put her off). She did 4 months for Bronze then continued on for Silver.

Draylon · 11/09/2015 14:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TeenAndTween · 11/09/2015 16:13

Just to clarify, it's not that I don't think Childcare is a worthwhile career, it's just that I'm not convinced DD would be that good at it. She's not very good at common sense, risk awareness, and thinking on her feet and I would view those as pre-requisites for looking after other people's children.

HSMMaCM · 11/09/2015 16:48

T&T don't worry about offending child carers. I am one and tried to put DD off taking childcare as a GCSE. She still took it, but said at the beginning of yr 11 she wished she'd taken geography instead.

Abraid2 · 11/09/2015 17:04

MEGirl, watch those tonsils. My eldest had tonsillitis often as a younger child and had a few minor bouts in year 11. We were always told he'd grow out of it and tonsillectomies weren't done much nowadays.

Two days before AS levels he went down with an appalling bouthe had glands swollen in his abdomen, a very high temperature and was just very, very ill. The GP thought he might have glandular fever. We managed to wrangle a whole 2% 'consideration' on the AS level exams he dragged himself into school to takeGod knows how! He didn't do badly in the papersp, but missed out on the very useful extra UMS points that could have bumped up his results in the harder A2s. He actually missed his university offers by one grade, about three raw marks in one subject and is going somewhere else now. It has all worked out well, but has been very stressful.

We actually paid for him to have the tonsils removed in the October of Year 13 after another very bad episode, because, when we finally got the NHS to agree they needed to come out, they couldn't have fitted him in for eight months, which would have taken us right up to A2s. The surgeon said the tonsils were horrendous when he removed them--covered in scar tissue. The operation cost £4,000 and was a real financial wrench, but we felt we had no option but to pay.

So, if you sense this is becoming a recurrent problem (and it may not be), try and persuade them to take action and take the damn things out. They don't like doing it, for understandable reasons (it's not a pleasant operation and lots of people do grow out of it), but taking important public exams when you feel so ill is awful. And I think the stress did play a part in the really bad episode just before AS levels.

Abraid2 · 11/09/2015 17:10

Sorry, just reread and hope I didn't sound alarmist! Just don't want anyone else to go through the stress we have had. Not all tonsillitis is this severe, obviously. :)

SugarPlumTree · 11/09/2015 18:51

I hope there are some happy children relieved the week is over (and parents).

Thank you as always for your support. I feel i'm living in some kind of flipping soap opera at the moment. Much better news to report on DD. Her friend wasn't on the bus this morning but all passed without incident, as did the return trip home thank goodness.

She finally had media today, 4 lessons. Sounds like she did reasonanably enjoy it, said it was chilled. She is one of only 3 girls and said lots of boys who are clearly doing it for just something to do, but one is nice and joined her and the girls.

So early days but cautiously optimistic. She has her group of friends from Upper School as well which is a nice group. I'm not prepared to let the girls on the bus drive her out. Hopefully they will leave her alone. If worst comes to the worse DH can take her to train station. If at the end of next week she is liking the course then I think we're ok.

I need to start a thread on DS though really. He came out in floods of tears. Sat in the car crying, trying to curl up in the foetal position. It took about half an hour before he could talk. He doesn't like the people there and says he doesn't feel safe like he did at first school.

bigTillyMint · 11/09/2015 19:03

Oh SugarPlumSad your poor little DS. Has he pinpointed exactly what it is that is making it nor feel safe? Are others being mean to him or is he "just" petrified of the older ones? Do you think the school could/would do anything if you were to go in about it?
Good news about your DD today though - fingers crossed for her.

TeenAndTween · 11/09/2015 20:00

Ah Sugar so that's where all the boys are - doing Media.
Hardly any boys at all on either of DD's courses.

SugarPlumTree · 11/09/2015 20:10

He said he feels that there are a number of children who have various difficulties and are allowed to get away with hurting other people. There's a boy who is blind who hit him with his stick last year. He told his TA who said it would be noted and if he did it again then he would be told off. The boy then pushed DS backwards off a bench, he complained, nothing was done. There's only one year ahead of them now so it's not the older ones. Then there's the boy who has moved to his class for a fresh start creating issues. A couple of years ago a girl sandpapered his face in woodwork and swung a saw around saying she'd cut his head off.

The PE teacher had a go at them this afternoon as about 20 of them misheard and did the thing he to,d them not to do. DS has taken away from that that those who did it wrong are a bunch of losers, won't get jobs or go to university. He then got upset and cried, people noticed and it all went pear shaped. I have sent a long email to his tutor outlining all this, highlighting that he doesn't feel safe and that he started from not the best point as had seen his sIster end up in plaster from incident there. It's his birthday tomorrow so trying to make that nice for him. Then DH and I need to work out what to do. There is now a different head to when DD was there which helps.

DD has perked up after food and been filling me in. She is definitely liking it and doesn't want to go back to school, just tired from travel which I think she'll get used to. So at least she is happy and one is sorted.

dingit · 11/09/2015 20:43

Sugarplum, nothing helpful to add, but that sounds a nightmare, there's nothing worse than seeing your dc so unhappy. At least you can give him some tlc over the weekend, and I hope school get it sorted out.

SugarPlumTree · 11/09/2015 20:50

Thanks Dingit. We'll get it sorted somehow, I'm not prepared to live through what we did with DD. it's just sinking in that DD wants to stay at College and after the week from hell we have a good result for her Smile

MossAgate · 11/09/2015 21:03

SugarPlum. We had similar issues years ago (in the state system) and ended up consulting Kidscape (a children's charity).

www.kidscape.org.uk/

The ZAP courses are amazing. Life changing as they concentrate on your dc's reaction.

Idefix · 11/09/2015 21:38

Sugar that sounds like a truly awful starts for your ds, can't express how sad I feel for him. Glad to hear dd is happy with college. I hope you get somewhere with ds tutor. It must be scary for him, being so aware of what happened to his dsis.

Happy to report emotions are settling here. Only one week in but ds seems happy and come home smiling. It has made me realise what a strain he was under with having to take subjects he really disliked and found hard to do well in.

bigTillyMint · 11/09/2015 21:48

God it sounds awful for your poor DS, SugarPlum. I think Moss's suggestion to try kidscape sounds good, in addition to tackling the school of course.
Really glad to hear your DD is happy though- that's fabSmile

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