Private schools without the pressure

[SunshineQuack]

Hi

This is all a bit theoretical but my DF has just offered to pay for DD's school fees when she's a bit older as we don't have a great set of state schools around us.

We're currently just looking at our options. I'm quite keen on avoiding academic hothouses - my school was quite academically pressured and while I got very good grades I don't want the same adolescence for DD. She's very bright, very creative, and a real live wire - very energetic. She tends to like things to do, and doesn't need a lot of pushing - she loves to feel like she's doing well. DH thinks she'd do really well at any school, but I'm hoping for somewhere which is good on pastoral care, good on arts, music and drama, and while it will give her the opportunity to thrive academically, won't be too much of a hothouse.

We're looking at boarding schools in England (ideally south east so she can get home relatively easily) or day schools in the London area. We're RC and open to RC schools (she's in an RC state primary at the moment).

I had Bedales in my head as an option, but I am basing that on the media and one person I know who went there and I don't know if I've got an idealized view of the place.

SuiGeneris: The Laurels is NOT 'an Opus Dei school'! We do not belong to Opus Dei, and are over the moon about both the pastoral care and the education that our daughter is receiving there.

Their chaplain is from Opus Dei, but that is the only formal way in which the school is any different to any other Catholic school. It has never been put forward, either explicitly or implicitly, to parents or students.

OP, you could google St JoseMaria Escriva (founder of Opus Dei) + Education - he had some very interesting and enlightened views on the subject!

If you are in SE London, Farringtons in Chislehurst might suit your dd, or Babington House. Both do not select academically.

CSLewis: yes, of course you are right. The Laurels is neither owned nor run by OD, but I think that if you research PACT (the group that founded and controls the school) I think you will find strong OD links and similarities with OD-linked schools the world over. And the chaplain in a Catholic school has a strong influence. Of course it does not require all families to be members, the market would be too limited and the OD members with a stake in the school (helpers, teachers, etc) would not be able to introduce more people to OD, which they are encouraged to do.

None of this means it is not a good school or that it might not be suitable for the OP. You clearly are very happy with it. I just thought the OP would want to know, given the importance of a school's ethos.

Fair enough, SuiGeneris . For the record, PACT stands for 'Parents And Children and Teachers': the word order reflects their educational 'world view', so to speak (I.e parents are the primary educators of their children, and teachers are there to support and uphold both the children and their parents.)

PACT is a group of parents who started by setting up their own primary school, and now are responsible for 2 primaries and 2 secondaries. Apologies for slight derail! But relevant in the context of my whole-hearted recommendation of The Laurels, to anyone of any faith or none.

When I read what you were looking for, I immediately thought of Sevenoaks, but it's possible my impression of it may be a bit out of date. Perhaps when you have a shortlist, post again.

St Christophers in Lechworth? Or (if you want something really different) there's always Summerhill.

I was a day pupil at a girl's boarding school in Oxford (they do weekly boarding too, if that's better) which definitely doesn't hot house, and is good on family atmosphere etc. If we were looking for boarding, I'd look there - my two, though able, do not thrive on external pressure - but as it is we're sticking to SW London day schools, and currently prefer the local State option to the local indies, on the whole.

Do PM me if Oxford area is of interest!