Do you pay/reward your children for their results/reports?

[shewhoneverdusts]

The title says it all really. The reason I ask is my dd (12) has taken her yr9 sats this year and her friends are all bragging about their results and how much money they are getting for it. She got the same (and some better results as they did) but I don't feel it's necessary to pay my dd for what is essentially a normal part of school life. Just wondered if I am being mean or what others think.

For A levels and GCSEs. I've drawn the line at degrees, though. It's a controvesial subject. I think for public exams that will be on their job and university applications if it's not against your principles do it.
I got some money on my A levels or O levels.

yes indeedy most certificates this term = £3

gcses grade c or above are worth £20 - an A* is worth £50.

there is no pressure - they can work for it or not - up to them.

it works out evenly - becuase ds1 didn't pas any - we think- but spent £200 on toold for his job

will do the same for ds2 who prolly wont pass any either

so the loser will be dd becuase she will have to get an awful lot of gcses to get the equiv.

I have a 14 year old son who will be going into year 10 in Septmber. We have decided that he will get £20 for every A-C grade GCSE,£35 for every A grade and £50 for every A*. It's difficult to get him to work hard at school even though according to his school he's really bright, as it's not the done thing to be a swot (as he sees it) if your a boy - he'd much prefer to be seen as "cool" by his peers and mess around in school or just play sport, so I'm happy to offer a financial incentice, whatever it takes to get him to put some effort in!

DS1 (just finished year 8) got a great report this year that shows he's worked hard so I took my three kids out for lunch to celebrate. In the past I've given smallish things that he has wanted (CD etc.) just to say well done. I think it's nice if hard work is recognised; DS1 is dyslexic and finds school difficult but is really encouraged by praise.

No - never have. Surely the reward is getting the good grade. If I took an exam I'd be chuffed to bits to have achieved the best I can. I wouldn't expect someone to buy me something for it. We try to get across to the kids that learning is for their benefit. If they don't feel that it's worth it then either it's not for them at this point or we haven't explained well enough how good grades would benefit them. We also don't make a big deal of it if they don't get the top grades as long as they have done their best. Seems to have worked up to now. That's not to say that we are not all pleased and excited with them when they do well.

I didn't promise anything to DD for GCSE's but she did really well & we have just come back from a major shopping trip - and she said at the end "It would have been a good day even if you hadn't bought me anything", which was really sweet!

I had no intention of ever offering such financial rewards - we never had them as children (and Dh's parents don't give a fig about any form of education), but Ds1 was coasting so much, and so reluctant to work that we joined with the herd and offered fiscal rewards based on % results. I'm still unhappy about it on the grounds mentioned above, I'd far rather he worked because he enjoys doing well, but he doesn't, and he won't - he'd rather be Mr funny and cool at school :-(
the fiscal rewards did work this summer, his results, and work ethic were considerably better {resigned emoticon}

Hi, This is slightly related so I hope someone can help. My 9-year-old daughter was walking with our adult friends through a field. The conversation turned to Earthquakes; before one of the adults started explaining how they come about, my daughter burst in and went into full-on detail about Tiptonic plates and failure system etc etc (far beyond my knowledge anyway!). What struck me most was the enthusiasm and successful way of explaining her knowledge. When we got home I was so proud and wanted to show her how proud, I gave her £10 of my own birthday money, and said. "I'm not giving you this as money as such, I'm giving you this as a sign of a reward. You work hard, learn all you can and find something that you are passionate about then rewards will come your way. Now, I'm stuck and slightly ashamed that I used money. I'm worried I really did the wrong thing and got lost in how proud I was and wanted to express and encourage it. Now I'm worried about the long game and the next time she does well, I want to steer away from money. Any advice welcome.

gate

You should really have started your own thread rather than bumping one that's 13 years old.

We do random meals/days out etc as treats. We don't tie monetary value to results. We reward hard work/effort - eg DD1 got little treats during GCSEs and then an 'extra' thing for prom, rather than waiting for results day. DD2, y9, is currently on a star chart for doing revision without fussing. The reward will be before the actual exams as it's for the effort/no-fuss not the results.

So my advice is

• keep things random
• praise hard work
• if they ask for reward then they (generally) don't get

Especially if you have more than 1 with different abilities!

For Y6 SATS DD got pizza from her favourite shop after the last exam. I prefer to praise effort not result.

The only time she got a reward was after finally passing the bloody pencil licence which made all our life a misery for months and she worked really hard and improved significantly.

Nothing for sport badges hen it is normal progress. For her riding exam we took her for lunch and ice cream afterwards,

I bought my DD an iPhone she wanted when she got all 1s in her effort grades in Yr 7. We spoke about her Christmas report when she got three 2s and I did say I would love her to get all 1s if possible, but I didn't think to reward her until after the event. I did the same in Yr 9 when she got all 1s again (upgrade from 6 to 8iphone). Now she is in Yr 10 I won't be rewarding her as phone still under contract and I feel she is old enough to do it all for her own rewards. She wants to do well in her GCSEs next year so wants to do well in Yr10. If however she had been lazy or not bothered and I felt she would do better with a bribe I would do it.

Zombie zombie 🧟‍♀️ thread.. year 9 sats abolished 11 years ago

For Gate

I think for this occasion, just look at her and tell her you are really proud of her, this is enough.