Who can afford private schools in the UK?

[wjchoihk]

Hi. I am not sure if this is an appropriate question to ask here. But I have always wondered how rich you should be to send children to private schools in UK. Fees are anywhere from 3000 up to 10000 per term. Even allowing for wide gaps in income, thinking of 'avearge' UK wage of 26,000 pound, math simply don't add up for a normal life with such high fees. I also know only 7% of children go private though.

How much of private parents live on "inherited" wealth and how much on simply superior current earnings? I have my kids at SW London privates but I wouldn't be able to afford this without current int'l expat package. Some parents at my kids' schools LOOK and ARE very very rich but most of them LOOK quite down to earth. But I can't ask....

"TOTALLYBS - Maybe we should start one! We could even put it in AIBU, but what wording? Something like ' AIBU to think that parents that choose to live where there are good state schools are completely mucking up the demographics of this country? If you can't afford private, surely you should take the Ofsted Special Measures school & be grateful! '
But we don't say things like that because it might offend people - yet those that choose private education are sitting ducks! "

Go for it!

Oh and FGS just ignore the deranged people who claim anyone can afford it by "making cutbacks" or deciding what their "priorities" are.

They don't realise that an awful lot of people - and we're talking middle-class people in good jobs - put off repairs to the house, drive old cars and shop at Morrisons anyway, as a matter of course, because they have to in order to afford the bills, and not because they are putting £10k a year aside for flipping private school.

Well this thread isn't called anything like that, is it? It's called 'who can afford private school'.

Dad, I know what you mean. have a good friend who has no mortgage, doesn't work much, dc are in private school and pays a cleaner. very nice but one day she asked me when I was admittedly moaning about how tired I was and a bit fed up a) why didn't i get a cleaner and b) why do you work all those hours (school hours)?

Some people are on a completely different planet. Where would the other money come from apart from income - inheritance, offshore bank account

MonkeySea - OK, we have savings, but not THAT much! And a lot of it goes every year on a holiday.

I think there's a strange sort of gap, actually, between truly low income families who might get a bursary,and those who can afford fees.

Round here, any kind of bursary is only offered to those earning under about £40k (family, not each). Substantial bursaries might be offered if you earn below about £25k. But an income of £45k doesn't somehow let you afford fees after tax of £25-30k a year (assuming two children). Can I flog one?

Remortgaging the house what if you've already done that earlier to create an extra bedroom and your income is wavering and feels insecure?

All smacks too much of gambling present security for hypothetical future gains, to me.

& that would achieve what exactly?
The same way as private school bashing is never going to change the views that state is best! DD has friends in state who would easily pass the entrance tests, but the parents will not let them take them because they want to prove that state is better & that all private school pupils will turn against their parents at some point - I don't understand, but I don't criticize!

We can't really use any analogies when talking about education - they are all imperfect. It certainly can't be compared, I feel, with consumer goods.

One thing people lose sight of on here is that even being in a position to have serious discussions about "choosing" where your child goes to school, of any kind, puts you in an unusually privileged position. Like all privilege, it is often invisible to those that have it.

Ok, so the answer is that some people are not interested and some are, then.

Dad - that sounds like sound advice as opposed to something to mock.

My friend has 5 years of school fees banked whereas we are paying fees from income. It's not an ideal situation to be in but luckily as long as one of us is in a job then the income will cover the fees. However, if a couple is on a lesser income then they will essentially be maxing themselves out in order to pay the fees.

Well Totally, it does seem to assume some sort of norm in which people have money other than income, doesn't it? Which is not the situation for the vast majority.

There are a lot of lucky babyboomers out there. Before we met, DH and I each bought flats in Earls Court in the 1980's for +/- £35,000. 90% mortgages. 3x salary.

The market since then has gone crazy. Those flats now sell for +/- £600,000.

I wasn't mocking the advice, but rather the presumption that everyone is in a position to choose. I mean, "make sure you get a gardener in to do all your lawns rather than trying to do them yourself" is sound advice, but that doesn't stop it containing a world of presumption.

Woozlebear - 100% agree with you! The people who dont want to live near/in London and gain from the house price increases, who want to have 3+ children and want their partners to be home every night at 6, who wont/cant for all sorts of reasons obtain full time roles, who dont have any inheritances coming up, who are perhaps on the 2nd marriages/partnerships etc are unlikely to be able to afford the school fees. That's just life.

I could give up my role tomrorow, go and work in a shop where I do a days work and at the end of the day shut the door and dont take the job home with me. I havent chosen to do this as it doesnt pay enough. So, I give up weekends taking calls from clients who for one reason or another need help. Its just how it is. I dont get paid overtime for it, I consider it is part of my role and most clients are very respectful of weekends! Of course once the school fees and the mortage are paid off its a different story!

I would love to buy Chanel suits and have a holiday home. Unfortunaely I cannot afford it. To snipe at people that have made the decision to go down the private route seems to indicate a 'well if I cannot have it, you shouldnt either'

Grovel - yes those flats in Earls Court. This is where the money was to be made. Hindsight is a great thing!

The one thing I really regret tbh was not putting some money aside on a monthly basis to at least pay a propotion of the fees. We are paying out of income which is never good especially with the current economy. However, we have plenty of equity in the house, we have been here for 14 years and the house has of course gone up in value because of where it is.

I think you find Maisie that when it comes to children, most people don't like to see other people's children who may be less able or less hard working, leap frog over their own children when it comes to university places or getting great jobs, on the basis - not of their innate ability - but on the basis that their parents have been able to buy them a privileged education.

From a child's perspective it is unfair. However hard your parents work or however lucky and privileged they are, that's your parents. It's not you. No one child deserves to be raised above another child on the basis of parental income.

But hey ho, that's the world we live in. It's not a meritocracy. Family money counts. Don't see why those of us whose children are disadvantaged by this system should be cheerful and accepting of it though. It is unfair.

Dad - the road called Presumption Road is a two way road.

I regularly read post where it is presumed that indie parents are rich, snobby and are out of touch with the problems and concerns of 'ordinary' people.

Seeker: "Sorry, Gregor, I don't believe you. That can't possibly happen! Your children were obviously "eaten alive" when you "threw them to the wolves" in year 7 and you are suffering from PTSD. grin"

Doh. [slaps self] That's where I'm going wrong. I shall slink back into the parallel universe occupied by people who believe that robust teenagers get bullied for taking their violin cases to school, and where children get mocked for liking reading and asking questions. That one?

So it's all a delusion that in his very average blokey comp my middle ds has a running competition going with his mates as to who gets the highest maths level? And looked at me baffled when I asked whether he gets teased for still being the music department's favourite blue-eyed boy treble. [Snurk]

I think some people just want to believe it's a jungle out there in state-school-land, in order to justify the eyewatering amounts they are caning out on fees.

We sent our 2 sons private school until they were 11, then state grammar. I knew that was what we wanted to do when they were born and started saving every month from then. The nurser stage is no more expensive than other nursery fees but after that it gets more each year, so I gradually put more aside. We only had an average mortgage and were both working but we cut down on social activity and anything other than modest holidays for the 11 years we were paying. It was worth it, the impact of the small classes, better teaching and freedom to run riot in large grounds, build dens etc. is more when they are very little than later.

But GREGOR, you cannot fault people who were eaten alive in the local secondary modern as a child themselves for wanting their child not to have to go through that surely?

Well at the risk of entering the lions den ,we afford it by effectively paying (currently for two) by allocating the whole of my salary for school fees,there was a time a couple of years ago where each month there was 10p left of my net income.

I am well aware that for many its not a choice but we we were lucky to be able to do it .We run second hand cars,have cheap holidays etc .around here though the schools will give bursaries quite far up the income scale so that a lot of people get a little help rather than one or two getting all the fees paid ,although some do get that.

I think if you have a child who is going to get 10 A*s they will probably get that anywhere but my children are not in that league so they need all the help they can get and I will do as much as I can for them .One has Spld and like someone else on this thread is at an independent specialist school which has made a massive difference to his life chances.

Also I really don't think that you can measure education in terms of grades,I don't like the style of education at my local outstanding comprehensive.It is all about league tables and all the pupils sit numerous exams to push the school up the rankings .DS has several friends there who were made to take 4 A levels and have lesser grades but more ucas points ,ds school would say better to get A*AA and paly adn instrument and play sport ,than get AABB plus general studies and critical thinking ,and most universities would agree.

In my book its not about what grades you get at school its about what else you have done at school.I wanted to choose the school that most matched my ethos of education and paying enables you to do that.I am very privileged I know ,but i have worked hard for it ,my grandparents had manual jobs and lived in council housing and worked hard to enable their children to have a better education than them.They expect to see me doing the same .

PUGS: no, but you can fault the logic of assuming that their children's experience will be the same as their experiences 30 years ago. There are undoubtedly schools that I would not be happy for my dc to go to. But not that many, and certainly not most state schools are like that.

Shagmund - A few years ago I was watching the post mortem debate after most of the Brit players were knocked out in the opening round of Wimbledon.

One of the Brit talking heads was going on about the Americans and Eastern Europeans and their entourage of nutritionists, fitness instructors, sports psychologist etc. The panel then collectively rolled their eyes as if to to say - how can people expect Brit players to win against pushy people like that.

It's kind of deja vu when I listen to some people talk about education. I mean, all those pushy parents working the system so that they get the coveted places/jobs over their naturally clever but untutored comp going DCs

If you think that your delicate children's heads will explode if they are pushed then that is fine with me. If you believe that a bright child doesnt need tutoring then that too is fine. Similarly if you believe that homework is the work of the Devil then that is up to you.

But please, please when my DC runs pass yours don't complain about how it's unfair.

I hate it when threads like these get derailed by the anti-private school brigade. The question was clear, ?Who can afford private schools in the UK?? I accept that some posters might not agree with the way other posters have phrased their responses when answering the affordability issue but it is wearing having to read through endless posts that have nothing to do with the OP?s question.

I don't begrudge those who use the private sector. I do mind the assumptions on these thread that anyone could do it if we stopped shopping in waitrose, buying new cars and holidaying. Assuming I'm not already doing those things, the sums of money are vast.

I'm a lucky person in many ways but we won't be able to afford school fees. That's ok, I think my kids will be fine.