Independent schools for the quirky/odd/non-conformist/downright difficult!

[Colleger]

Says it all really. If music school doesn't work out then we need to register at a school that will cater for a boy who is bright but only interested in academia when it suits him plus the personality above! I have to assume he won't get into Winchester and although Bedales would fit like a glove I do not want to accentuate the above traits! But let's not argue about Bedales!

Any advice?

Some comments seem to come out from the PR departments of these schools!?

No, pastoralacademia I can categorically assure you I don?t come from any Eton PR departments, if that?s what you mean. I just happen to know the school and many of their staff better than most.

There?s no such thing as a PR department at Eton. The school doesn?t need one. But the School Office will be able to answer any questions from anybody about anything about the school. For more specific enquiries you?ll be directed to the proper people/dept who will answer your queries. Believe me, they?re a very nice and polite bunch of people.

PR departments is just a 'facon de parler' and did not just apply to you. So far everyone I have spoken to from Eton has been nothing but friendly and helpful. However, the same way I don't wear a T.shirt of a football club I don't take on a school's motto as my nickname. Being impartial is key...it keeps our minds clear.

Can anyone help answer my genuine query about Eton ( which is now a few posts up, before the PR debate)? Thank you in advance....

Milkshake3, first of all, congratulations to both you and your son for opting for Eton. I sincerely hope he makes it. I understand this year there are appx. 1000 boys vying for about 240 places, the Oppidans, in Eton argot.

Additionally, there will normally be between 120-150 exceptional boys vying for the 14 King?s Scholarship places each year who will enter Eton as King?s Scholars (KS) if successful.

Eton is the largest public school in the UK but please, please don?t be scared about the size of the place. Your boy won?t be covering every inch of the campus if he goes there. He would spend most of his time between his House and his classrooms and perhaps going to the playing fields in the afternoon. His Housemaster with the assistance of the Dame (matron) together with his personal tutor will be the 3 most important adults in his life at Eton. Just think of the House as a small prep school (there are 25 of them including College) and each House has its own quirks and rules. The boys? allegiance is to their House.

Besides College where the 70 King?s Scholars live, each House has a total of appx. 50 boys, i.e. five year groups (called ?Blocks?) with roughly equal number of around 10-12 boys in each Block ranging from ages 13 to 18.

Your DS will quickly learn the ropes about the school and the size of the school never did pose a problem for any boy or his parents after a couple or so weeks once he?s there.

PM me if you think I can be of further help.

Thank you so much. I'm just worried he will slip down a crack so to speak but it sounds like the house system has it covered.

Milkshake, my DS left Eton a year ago. He loved it. I absolutely shared your worry before he went.

I don't have time now to address your question in detail (will try to come back) but would say that the small houses -50 boys- create a strong community/home from which the boys launch themselves out into the wider Eton experience.

Because the Houses are small the Housemasters and Dames know the boys well and there is little chance of them becoming lost or forgotten.

vixsatis - if your DS is intelligent but not typically so, then I think King's Canterbury should definitely be on your radar. There is a new headmaster in, and there is a feeling that things will get tighter in terms of bringing the academic standards up, but someone who is intellectually interesting should not - I imagine - have anything to fear.

peteneras you are obviously more initiated that Mr A and now Mr J, neither of whom would be as informed as you to think Eton a music school.

Most kids don't worry about size if there is a space for them, and that is done well provided you choose you Housemeister well and your boy is lucky enough to have a good Block. Surely milkshake you considered all this before applying?

My sister-in-law who is the only qualified music teacher, together with 3 or 4 others run a properly licensed ?music school? with scores of registered students. It is called, ?Yamaha Music School? which occupies the top two floors of a three storey building, the ground floor of which sells YAMAHA pianos, organs, guitars and all musical instruments YAMAHA.

Great! The students are happy, the music teachers are happy and YAMAHA very happy because the ?music school? makes more money than the music shop below.

As for Eton, with a total of 80 music teachers in its music dept. they never call themselves a music school some might call it a third tier music school any more than Oxford/Cambridge/Imperial/Harvard etc. calling themselves a medical school simply because they just excel in every faculty.

Squiff Thank you!

vixsatis if you son is "slow and useless" at IQ tests then I suspect you may have a bit of a problem as I believe Eton Win Coll and Harrow all undertake such a test as part of their interview process at yr 6/7. Have you got an ed. psych report? When DS was interviewed for Win Coll because the ed. psych report said he was dyslexic this was definitely taken onto consideration. You should also speak to the learning support dept. the one at Win Coll is excellent they would definitely be able to advise you. Win Coll has a reputation for positively welcoming the quirky intellectual he would not be alone but do not under estimate how academic this school is; the academic standards are unbelievably high I think it is the only school in the UK to only offer the much harder Pre U, the lessons are very fast moving, and the pressure is intense right from the moment a boy walk in the door so your DS would have to be able to keep up. You certainly don't have to be a "hearty" type but boys are expected to undertake regular sport particularly in the first two years. I understand that Eton is much more sporty (this is from the horses mouth; boys/parents currently there and parents with boys at both and its definitely taken more seriously) although I'm sure peteneras will disagree as she seems to believe Eton manages to embrace all again this is not what I hear. I'm not against it its an excellent school but I do not believe that any where can embrace all properly.

As far as music goes, Eton is the best non-specialist music school. The instrumental teachers are, more often than not, professors from the major conservatoires. Even if a child is at a junior department of a conservatoire they are not taught by the professors. Some of the teachers at Purcell also teach at Eton and I would put it top for music out of all the schools. Winchester is strong with music but it's location means it does not attract the best peripatetic staff. Harrow is a fantastic song school and also has some conservatoire teachers but not on the scale of Eton.

The two quirkiest children I've ever met and I mean quirky (this if from the mouth of a self confessed eccentric so general eccentricity is normal in my book) went to Bedales and Ampleforth both were incredibly bright and loved debating etc . I do agree StillSquiffy that the eccentric are or maybe were (new head so who knows) happy at Kings. No IQ test I believe just CE although again this may change.

Hi Wallow

In answer to your question about did I not consider Eton's size before applying, yes I did. However, I registered a long time ago and DS2 is only year 5 so won't do the test until year 6. He is registered for several schools, including the one where DS1 will go, and including some co-ed ones as we have a dd too. Eton def not right for ds1 but it might be for ds2 (as he is a v clever all rounder), hence the question. The size is all I am worried about with Eton - other than that I think it is a fantastic school and everyone I know with kids there has nothing but praise. Just looking for feedback really.

Grovel - thank you for your feedback. Very helpful.

milkshake, then hopefully DS2 House and Block will work well for him!

peteneras I can see why you think Eton is better than your Yamaha Music School.

Some MS prefer to do Purcell, Junior RCM and Westminster at the same time, partly to ensure maintain access to their professorial staff, but their parents would rather they did not seriously consider soloist careers, although Music at Oxford or Cambridge just about acceptable, ideally with a Choral Scholarship. Studying with a professor under a corporate contract is usually different from when s/he takes you on as a personal pupil, though it may suit both to transfer into a conservatoire arrangement because of the wrap-around. I'm afraid I don't know of aspiring soloists at the ?Yamaha Music School?, but peteneras will helpfully fill that part in.

OP perhaps you'll be happier with DS2 following DS1's footsteps. Does he prefer Eton or Purcell? The answer is a very strong message in itself. I hope he will have both options so he can decide freely.

He wants both at the moment but with all things, if he's happy at Purcell then I doubt he'd want to leave. If he settles then I would be wary about moving him.

Good luck in choice, vix. And if you want a recommendation for a house at King's (housemaster & family the most genuinely lovely people you could ever hope to meet) then PM me.

Milkshake, just to put a bit of flesh on my post above.

Each boy has a tutor (and is part of a tutor group of approx 10 boys from different Houses). They meet weekly. Any academic issues will handled in the first instance by the tutor. Not much room for slippage/being invisible. Termly reports come in the form of a letter from the tutor commenting on the subject reports and a letter from the housemaster covering the pastoral/extra-curricular etc.

As I said above the Houses are small. My DS was in a House which had its own dining room (as opposed to using the central refectory - Bekynton). By my estimate the Housemaster saw my DS at least 6 times a day (if not to talk to). At 3 mealtimes, at Chambers (mid-morning snack), at Prayers (not religious, a House get-together every evening) and on his evening rounds when he knocked on every boy's door and had a brief chat. I think that he and the Dame (around the House all day) had a pretty good feel for how a boy was feeling, whether he was busy enough etc. Difficult for boys in these circumstances to be lost/forgotten.

Hope this helps a bit. Reading it through it feels as if the boys are under constant surveillance. It's not like that at all. I'm really just trying to convey that Housemasters and Dames are around enough to spot potential problems. They get good at reading adolescent body language.

Grovel, thank you. That's very helpful. Let's see if he gets in given how competitive it is! Fingers crossed.

Milkshake, good luck. My only tip is that your DS should try to be an enthusiast in his interview. Eton are very aware that they are privileged to have fantastic facilities (sport, art, drama, music etc) and they want them used to the max by the boys. There was a time (across all such schools) when boys and girls were a bit "too cool for school" and preferred being rather cynical observers of extra-curricular life to being participants.

I can certainly fill you in wallowaway since you can?t see the basic difference between Yamaha Music School and the Eton Music Dept.

Any Tom, Dick and Harriet can set up a ?Music School? having just come into the world of music in the last 30 or so years versus the likes of people who had and still have, music in their core in appx. the last 600 years and have no need to tell the world they?re ?music specialists?.

As for aspiring soloists, I feel quite comfortable in saying not everybody wants to be a permanent ?performing monkey? (as Mozart?s father would say). There are far more important things to do in life than music as I?m sure the OP knows as she is desperately seeking a proper school for her undoubtedly very gifted musical DS who is already at a specialist music school.

And, putting two and two together now, I may even have actually seen and heard at first hand, OP?s son performing earlier this year and if I'm right that was actually OP's son, then believe me he is exceptionally good.

Wonder why his parents are now trying to pull him out of Purcell? Perhaps wallowaway can now fill us in?

Check your facts peteneras, and best not let your temper further reduce your ability to 'put two and two together'...

Clearly your musical judgement is superior to that of Purcell and similar schools, should they save their energies by contracting out their admissions function to you, peteneras?

Grovel, thank you again for the handy hint. Hopefully I'll be back for the inside track on housemasters next year!!

Calm down (as another OE at the Despatch Box would say) - this is only a discussion to try to help OP find the best school for her son, wallowaway. I don?t think that said OE at the Despatch Box would be too pleased either for you to rate his alma mater as a third tier music school.

Have a nice weekend!