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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Anyone want a secondary transfer support thread?

345 replies

HarrietJones · 13/06/2011 09:19

dd1 is going up in September, had an interview with her year tutor last week and induction days in a couple of weeks.
I've started looking at uniform & it's getting closer!

OP posts:
takeonboard · 12/09/2011 17:04

DS was very tired on Friday, but happy. Good day Saturday but not so good on Sunday when he realised he had lost half his stuff. He seems to be a bit all over the place and more dozy than usual, I think its having too much on his mind.
Got all his stuff back today and came home happy Grin

LIZS · 12/09/2011 18:46

ds was apprehensive this morning but then found out he does n't have to do rugby after all so very :) Seems to like the teachers and most lessons so far.

Bellavita · 12/09/2011 22:25

Ds2 seems happy enough - he has got himself a little friend.... A girl he spent Sat afternoon with her and has asked if she can come to tea next week.

He has been more tired than usual.

Takeon - phew what a relief for him getting his things back.

Hope there are no more recurrences Panda.

Kitten, how was DD today?

OhYouBadBadKitten · 13/09/2011 07:00

hi bellavita - very anxious :( esp at bed time.

Orchidlady · 13/09/2011 09:41

Can I join in? Thought DS was settling in well, only to be faced with floods of tears yesterday morning, after he had faked tummy bug, ( fell for lit like an idiot). Seems to be little better this morning but still appears very anxious. Any ideas on how I can help him cope. Also seems to obsessed that we will not pick him up @ the end of the day despite my reassurances.

swanriver · 13/09/2011 11:31

feeling quite anxious about everything to do with ss and protocols etc. Should I be talking to form tutor to say that ds's homework taking v long time? Or just let things settle for a while, comments come back....
We've been told to ring tutor if any queries, but no individual queries just a general feeling of there being TOO MUCH homework.
Don't want to be an interfering parent from start, not sure what is expected of me...Surely 2 hours every night on good day, is a bit over the top? That's not including the faffing around which adds another hour on.
State school, boys comp. Varied intake. Not generally thought to be pressurized. But high achieving at A level.

swanriver · 13/09/2011 11:33

Ds generally in v good spirits, but then breaks down in hysterics every now and then over specific tasks, which we sort out, but still...Hmm
Needs a lot of TLC.
Have neglected other children to deal with him.

CoffeeIsMyFriend · 13/09/2011 11:50

swan and orchid I would contact the form tutor. Most schools pastoral care in yr7 are very very good and they want the new children to settle in well.

Re homework, I would sit with your child, go over what they have to do, make sure they understand and let them make a start, leave them for 15 mins and then go back and make sure they are still working on the right thing.

If you think your child is struggling definitely contact head of year/form tutor.

The school in my experience really want to help.

Hope it settles down soon. poor kiddies.

Orchidlady · 13/09/2011 11:59

Thanks Coffe, actually started another thread this morning, now had a call from the head of year as was in floods of tears this morning, so hopefully they will be able to settle him a bit. Feel a bit useless at the mo.

takeonboard · 13/09/2011 12:15

orchid poor you and your DS. It looks like the matter has been taken out of your hands, the school will have seen this so many times and have the experience to deal with it. They will ensure he feels much more settled and happy by the end of this week and you should get immediate feedback if there are any further problems. I hope he is feeling better by the end of today.

swan my DS used to be like this, it took him a while to organise himself with regards to homework and until your DS knows what his teachers expect of him he will probably be trying too hard and working too slowly in an effort to achieve perfection. He will gradually get into the swing of it over this 1st term then before you know it he will be rushing through it too fast - which even more worrying!

Bellavita · 13/09/2011 18:16

Sorry your DS is not having a good time Orchid, the homework thing sounds like an awful lot of work.

Kitten, have you contacted the form tutor?

Your poor DS Swan.

I feel like my two are competing with each other at the moment. DS1 because he is now in Yr10 and doing new subjects and wants to talk to me about them and DS2 being in Yr7 and that being all new and wanting to tell me about it, my head is spinning.

DS2 broke down tonight... He didn't have his phone with him to txt me to ask if he could stay behind after school to audition for Guys and Dolls, so he has missed out. I have asked DS1 to meet him at break tomorrow and take him the Music Dept and help him ask if there are any parts left and if not, if they need help behind the scenes.

swanriver · 13/09/2011 18:27

Today has been better, very little homework, because we did so much the last few days we are actually ahead! Yay! I thought maybe he would get three pieces to hand in next day every night, but maybe Monday is bad...

Ds in good mood generally, and had time to go for a run. He says everyone in his class has been getting detentions for not handing stuff in Shock

Bella bet they haven't decided parts yet. We did Guys and Dolls at school, I remember absolutely loving it. I know every song off by heart.

orchid hope pastoral side kicks in

3monkeys · 14/09/2011 11:03

DS1 doing well so far. Was worried about rugby yesterday but was delighted he didn't get in the squad! Dinners a problem, he's eating some weird combinations! Mash and chipslast week,

He was planning to go to basketball at lunchtime today so hope he manages to do that. Very weary though, and not keen on homework. Am waiting for the day when it all gets too much

OhYouBadBadKitten · 14/09/2011 14:46

I havent contacted the form tutor yet Bellavita, she managed to work things out a bit more yesterday and gained some confidence from doing that, so she didnt cling to me at bedtime. I will do if i think I need to though. Lots of homework again last night :(

I spent much of the night fretting that we sent her to the wrong school (very academic and a bus journey away so she doesnt seem to be finding any free time in the week) She sees her old friends going off to the local school each day and they seem so happy and waving and still have bounce and dd seems so serious and sensible.

Bellavita · 14/09/2011 16:48

Kitten, am glad she seems more positive and you haven't sent her to the wrong school!

3monkeys, hope DS managed to do basketball. Wow, yes, a weird combo! Grin

Guess what.... Auditions are on again tonight for Guys and Dolls. DS2 had his phone with him today so rang me after school had finished to say he was going to stay. Worked out quite well really as he will walk down into the little town and meet me as he is being tutored tonight at 5.30.

Lonnie · 14/09/2011 23:20

dd2 is exhausted floods of tears today and not made better by my being massively stressed and wasnt too happy with her lackofthought to us needing the supermarket for her stuff (us having driven past it twice a few minutesearlier)

homeworkseems tobe complex for her though not seeingwhy this is harderthan primary stuff she didnt want to go swimming today as she was to tired

CoffeeIsMyFriend · 15/09/2011 08:05

DS told me he didnt feel well today - but I think it is tiredness! So I sent him up for a shower and lo and behold he is now dressed, ready for school and had breakfast!

dukat · 15/09/2011 15:18

Can anyone help with information on musical aptitude test for secondary school entry? Thanks.

OhYouBadBadKitten · 15/09/2011 18:50

How on earth are they going to make it all to half term?
dd is very tired - missing Guides tonight but she does seem happier today and only one lot of homewrok to do. :)

not heard of that dukat - sorry.

CeliaFate · 15/09/2011 18:56

Dd is much quieter, more thoughtful and amenable since starting secondary school. Not sure whether to be Sad Shock or Grin!

Bellavita · 15/09/2011 19:09

Dukat, sorry I haven't either.

Ds2 is also tired. He even said rather than going out to play last night he would watch a DVD instead. This is so no like him! He is out come wind, rain or shine usually.

Lonnie · 16/09/2011 07:41

we had tears for the first time this morning. Tears over her mobileschool a teacher had said they where not even allowed it intheir locker (she goes to school over 30 mins away and needs a mobile to contact us if she misses bus ) I was trying to explain she had to have misunderstood and that it was aswe originally was told she canthave it on her in school but switched off and in her locker is fine.

then on walking down to bus with dh she started crying and didnt want to go. He said on asking what would make it better she said "someone to talk to me" (she was only one from her school to go to this school)

ohh roll on halfterm and her settling down I do seem to remember dd1 being likethis too

whoknowswho · 16/09/2011 08:02

Oh Lonnie I really feel for you and your DD - at least it's friday. My DS was tearful a couple of days last week - when I asked what he did after eating lunch he said he just walked around playground on his own - he too was only one from his primary to go to this school. DH and I have tried to encouraged him to join some lunch clubs and he's met a couple of likeminded souls - no great friendships yet but I'm told by friends that by Christmas i'll wonder why I worried (but you do don't you!). DS school are having tests for the first two periods - I'm guessing they are CAT tests? He doesn't seem phased by that anyway!

CoffeeIsMyFriend · 16/09/2011 09:26

Lonnie - maybe contact form tutor and let them know of your DD situation. I hope she makes some new friends soon. poor thing.

My DD came to me this morning and asked if he could print some pictures from my laptop... err why? Homework! to be handed in today - he thought it was next Friday. So we did it together, but he got 'the look' and told not to ever do that again.

I can see the xbox and ipod being removed.

CeliaFate · 16/09/2011 09:39

Lonnie, I second contacting the form tutor or head of year. It just makes them aware and they could help to get dd more settled with a buddy system of older children.