Considering a Catholic School for a Non Catholic child...

[VerintheWhite]

We are considering sending our DD to a Catholic all girls school because it seems to be the best fit for her, however, we are not Catholic or even CofE. Has anyone had any experience of this situation? The school has mostly Catholic girls with a small minority of other religions.

Of course they want musicians. They need someone to play the organ while the priests whip the nuns to beat the suppressed sexuality out of them. I've met these Opus Dei types and, believe me, your daughter will end up on her knees praying for forgiveness.

Hope this helps.

To state the obvious, schools around the UK differ widely, and Catholic schools differ as much as any. We often see on Mumsnet that people tend to have quite extreme views about everything from the awfulness of all state schools, to the awfulness of all private schools, to the awfulness of all Catholic schools, to the awfulness of all Academies, etc. In some cases they're probably right, and in some cases they're probably wrong.

No-one can tell you about a specific school - it may be the way described on this thread, or it may not. Really, all you can do is to go in and check it out for yourself.

My previous job involved visiting a lot of schools across the country, talking informally to kids and teachers, and in the inner-city areas I visited a couple of Catholic schools who were achieving outstnading results with pupils who might have been unfairly written off at another school.

I remember sitting in on a chat that turned into a particularly lively debate about God with four teenage girls from one inner-city Catholic school - they certainly had no qualms in taking an independent, questioning attitude to religious faith, (Shall I say that's putting it mildly?) but they were more than happy to listen and debate with anyone who disagreed with them, on any topic from politics to science to religion.

I went to Catholic school and I am not a Catholic (was brought up C of E by my mum and my dad is a lapsed Catholic which is worse than being an atheist).

I can honestly say it impacted me in no way whatsoever so if you like the school, go for it.

My DD attends a catholic primary school and my son goes to a catholic grammar school, both schools are excellant and take at least 25% non catholics, religion is not rammed down their throats and they don't do prayers every day. I can't praise their schools enough.

Thank you all for all your input! Ty expecially those with experience, very helpful.

At the risk of getting flamed I will add my two penneth worth!

I attended a C of E primary school and both my children attend one, ok these days alot of the children are all different denominations least of all christian but at the end of the day is'nt it all about teaching our children to get on with each other and respect the religion and rights of everyone? In our experience its not thrust down your throat day in and day and the children do seem to have more respect for each other.

Some of the posters here have made religion and attending a faith school out to be akin to catching a nasty disease.

In this day and age when a good school seems hard to come by why discremenate on its faith?

I think people are scornful of faith schools because these schools discriminate.

Come up to Glasgow and see what faith schools do for the community. Children should not be segregated because of their parents' religion. It leads to suspicion and misunderstanding on both sides.

I guess it depends in what way you feel they are discrimating against pupils, every school has an admission criteria so why shouldnt one of those be on faith? Those who are regular worshippers will argue that they are discrimated against if they have to send their child to a non faith school and there are more of those in this country that faith ones!

Anyway this day and age faith schools have to take pupils of all faiths and religions often at their detriment.

My DTS's attend a Catholic Independent School despite the fact that they and myself are atheists and my DH is a Sikh! We sent them there because it is a good school and it seemed the best choice for them at the time. The school accepts kids from any religious denomination and a lot of the kids that go there are non-christian.
Catholicism is not rammed down their throats though most of their RS classes have concentrated on christianity and the only other religion they studied briefly was Islam.
The main drawback is that they have to take RS GCSE as an option which to my mind is a total waste of their time when they could be studying something more useful or which they enjoy more.
They also have to attend mass on Holy days but all this seems to have done is confirm their atheism I am glad to say!

Faith should not be a part of state education unless it is being studied as an academic subject.

Peteneras - assuming we're talking about the same school (and there is only one Catholic Grammar school in North London, afaik) where in the admissions criteria does it say you have to be baptised before the age of 2?

Lots of schools do have those kinds of criteria, agreed, but the grammar school doesn't.

Anyway this day and age faith schools have to take pupils of all faiths and religions

No they don't. We read the secondary schools admissions policies for our LEA last year (DD was in yr6) and thats simply not true here. Some would allow 'up to 15%' other faiths - no minimum, and absolutely no places for children of parents not belonging to a list of specified religions.

In this day and age when a good school seems hard to come by why discremenate on its faith?
To many of us the logic of that is totally inverted. Why discriminate against a pupil on its (or rather its parents) faith?

Grimma, faith schools do have to take pupils of other faiths if they have places available and can't fill them with applicants from the relevant faith group or groups. They can give priority to families of a particular faith, or varying priorities to people of different faiths, but they can't refuse entry to people of no faith if there are places available.

In practice it does amount to turning away applicants not from a particular faith, but that's only because many faith schools are oversubscribed with people who meet the religious criteria. Oversubscription criteria only apply if they have more applicants than places, so the (not insignificant) number of under-subscribed faith schools will tend to have higher numbers of people from different faiths or no faith.

Verinthewhite, are you sure it is the best fit for your DD? One of it's major defining features is 'Catholic' and she isn't Catholic. Even if every other feature is perfect, that's going to be a hard one to push aside.

What when she starts thinking same sex marriage etc is wrong? Will it still be perfect then?

Quite. In practice, faith schools don't have to take pupils of all faiths and religions.

Letting them in because its undersubscribed means either its probably not a very good school or that there are too many faith school places in proportion to the real number of adherents to that faith. Excuse me for not thanking them for that

I was sent to a Catholic high school by my parents (atheist and methodist) when I was 11. I loved it. I ended up studying A level theology there. But I'm not a believer in any of it myself.

The school accepted nonCatholics but it was also in the Times Good School Guide (or something like that) with v good results so I think it's possible for noncatholics to go to good catholic schools.

RC schools are different to CoE schools I think - Catholicism is everywhere - crucifixes in all classrooms, prayers I had never heard of before, confession assemblies, residentials to places run by priests, photos of the Pope on the walls, only a handful of sex ed lessons and they were in biology class. So yes. Some major faults! But it suited me OK.

I think it depends on your DD. Also mine was a mixed school - maybe a catholic girl school is a step too far!

are you sure it is the best fit for your DD? One of it's major defining features is 'Catholic' and she isn't Catholic. Even if every other feature is perfect, that's going to be a hard one to push aside. What when she starts thinking same sex marriage etc is wrong?

Yes, exactly, this is the way I am thinking and why I am looking into it carefully instead of picking a school based on its academic and musical reputation. I am going to have to examine the school carefully. It seems that some schools bring faith practices into the class room more than others.

However, we do not have very many options so we are going to look into it.

There are a lot of posts here by people who clearly have no experience of faith schools and/or have an axe to grind.

One of the things that amuses me is that so many posters seem to firmly believe that Catholic schools are highly successful in indoctrinating their pupils. They are not.

I went a girls' Catholic primary school from the age of four, and moved up to the attached secondary at age 12. My parents were both Catholics. By the age of 21 I had rejected the faith.

I sent both of my children to a very good local Catholic primary (yes, I know I'm a hypocrite, but please let's not have that argument just this minute) and my DD is now at a Catholic girls' school. Her situation is different from mine in that both her parents are confirmed atheists. She has already decided that she doesn't believe in God.

Nevertheless I don't regret at all sending her to that school. It has a good, caring ethos and she has grown up in a Catholic environment and understood that particular faith 'from the inside', as it were. She is a bright girl and can think critically about what she is being taught and expected to accept.

What's more, I hope that when she is an adult she will have a more sympathetic understanding of people of all faiths and some inkling as to what their faith means to them - that she will be a 'compassionate atheist', as it were. We could do with a lot more of that.

I agree with much of what has been said on this thread about religion, but I don't think it's helpful to the OP.

OP: Visit the school with your DD and talk to other parents. I'm guessing that if it selects on music above faith, then the Catholic ethos is probably not all that hardcore.

Visit the school with your DD and talk to other parents

Absolutely! Try to visit in a normal schoolday, not just open day. This applies to all schools, not just faith - stats and reports are just the starting point of working out if a school is right for your child.

What when she starts thinking same sex marriage etc is wrong

'When'? I managed to come out of 7 yrs at a Catholic school without having such bigoted views. It is possible, you know.

I don't see the point in sending your child when you know that it is a load of superstition and nonsense.

But if it's 'right' for yourchild then none of this matters apparently.

possible, yes. it's up to the op if she wants to take the risk though.

I don't see the point in sending your child when you know that it is a load of superstition and nonsense.

Well, it depends what your choices are. If it was up to me I'd secularize the lot of them, but back in the real world DDs classmates who lived out of catchment for the 'good' comp had the choices of move, pay, faith or dire 'sports college'. For those who couldn't take the first two options, maybe the faith school wasn't entirely right for their child but I can see that it might have been the least wrong.

Oh, that's really nice, thinking what some people really believe in is a load of superstition just so your kid doesn't haven't to associate with the hoi polloi.

Never mind that some people take their faith seriously, haaahaa, what a bunch of misguided idiots, because their kids are someone I'd rather have mine associate with, never mind I think they're all a bunch of morons.

Would you be saying the same thing if the school were say, Islamic, or is it only okay in the PC world to rip the piss out of Catholics?

I don't disagree for one minute that all faith schools should be private/fee-paying.

I'm not from here, where I'm from, you want a faith school, you either pay up or home school. I was shocked when I found out it was otherwise.

Best I could figure out, it was some throwback to the 1600s, the way the Prince of Wales can't marry a Catholic and still be king, though he can marry anything else.

But of out-dated codswallop.

Fair enough, that's how it is here.

What I object to is a system where people basically BS to get their kid into a certain school where the parents actively scorn the very beliefs under which that school exists because they think their kid is about the unwashed unmasses at where they're zoned to go, but it's all right to send them to a place where they approve of the populace, but rip the piss out fo their beliefs.

I don't think that's okay.

Ever.