Do you do everything? Ironing etc?

[Piscesmumma1978]

Do you iron your dhs clothes and do all the washing etc?

I'm starting to get sick of it now. If I work part time I'll still do it all but work as well.

Just wondered how everyone else manages things at home.

When I was a SAHM for years, I did all the housework...everything. I saw it as my job. He earned the money and I did everything else.

That's not to say that he didn't help out, but it was 99% me. He'd get involved with chores if I was knackered or asked him cos I couldn't be bothered or whatever, but these occasions were rare tbh.

But if its not working for you, ask him if he can take on a few of your most hated jobs and see what he says. Negotiate with him.

I'm a SAHM to two. One in Reception, one in nursery p/t.

I do everything. Although we do share bedtime duties.

I do all the washing, ironing, shopping, cooking, gardening, cleaning. All appointments to do with DC and anything they need.

Completely understand where you're coming from. It can be exhausting and monotonous.

I'm happy to do the stuff I've mentioned, but have let DH know I won't be doing it all, by myself, over the summer holidays. Half terms are one thing, a whole six weeks with no sign of him is something quite different!

When I was a SAHM I did all the cooking, washing up, laundry etc. (I iron as little as possible whether I'm a SAHM or not!)

My DH was working long hours at the time, and the key thing for me was that he shared the childcare when he was at home - I felt this was more important than him doing the cleaning. So he always did bathtime if he was home in time, took the DC swimming at the weekend etc.

Also he did all the garden jobs and DIY. Sorry, I know that's sexist, but I'm rubbish at that kind of thing!

To me, it's less about the division of jobs and more about the amount of free time you both get. Is that roughly evenly balanced?

In terms of how I manage it.

I do washing every day, and try to put away as much as possible at the time.

I tidy up after drop off and again when they've gone to bed.

I make all food from scratch and we all eat together every night.

And most importantly I make time for myself every day. Whether I go to the gym for an hour, or out for a walk or coffee. Otherwise I might lose the will!

When I was a SAHP I did everything up to a point but I didn’t iron my husbands clothes 😵‍💫 I’m not his mother and he’s not a small child

I iron as little as possible anyway, and I've never ironed anything of DH's after he once gave me a few pointers about how I could improve upon ironing his shirts. I was pregnant and working f/t at the time.

I do all the washing now.

Thanks everyone. I guess I'm really feeling like the employee at the moment. I've suggested he finds someone else to do his ironing!

I'm not a SAHM, but only work 2 nights a week. I do the majority of housework, cooking, etc, but DP will pick up the slack when I'm working, and on mornings we are both home, he will do the school run, then we'll do any chores that need doing together. For us the work is divided by how much free time we have, and as I have more, I do more. I don't resent this as DP works 2 jobs, and more than does his share of chores when he's home.

Wow, he's a brave man 🤣

I'll only iron a few T-shirts for DH if they're in with DCs. I don't do anything that requires a lot of effort, and he prefers his own technique to mine which suits me!

When I was a SAHM I did all of it apart from cutting the grass. Couldn't wait to go back to work. To be fair to DH, he is a teacher and does most of it during the holidays now I am back FT.

I do everything (housework/child related) when DH isn't here.

We split it when he is here. However he can be home as little as a few days a month (or away months at a time sometimes but not recently) ... or he could be WFH for a week or two!

He does the majority of his own washing simply to keep his "away" stuff separate. I'd iron the odd shirt/uniform if it needed doing urgently but apparently my creases aren't sharp enough! 😂

I'm a sahm and I do all the housework (iron as little as possible though, only what's needed. husband is in construction so no need to iron his work stuff)
But he does all the driving and we share the dog walking.
When I go back to work I expect him to pick up the housework 50/50.
The kids also chip in, that's how they earn their pocket money.

I was a sahm for a long time and tbh, it came down to what ages/needs the children had. So for example anytime I had a newborn/young child DH did a share of washing, cooking and all of his shirts. However as the kids got older and more independent, I did more. If anyone was sick or there were lots of things going on DH fended for himself.

By the time the youngest was in reception I did all the cooking, cleaning and ironing shirts, which I felt was fair as I still had a fair amount of free time and no work stress. I'm now back at work part time and I do pretty much all of the child related stuff, including the mental load of their diaries but I don't iron for DH and he picks up the slack at weekends.

Different things work for different families so if you're fed up you probably just need to talk it out with your partner.

Your not a SAHP you are working! I work part time and do not do everything. I certainly try and do what I can while I'm at home but no way would I do it all. Husband does the food shop and bathrooms without me having to think about it. Takes on other jobs when needed. For example he has cooked dinner every night this week& folded the washing last night. I didn't ask he just did it.

I don't iron anything. We are a non iron household 🤣 DP doesn't wear shirts for work, and I only buy clothes that don't need ironing because I just hate it and can't be bothered. Don't care if bed sheets are wrinkled. If clothes have a bit of a wrinkle I just hang them up and let it drop out.

My DP is quite good though. He will do loads of his own washing, and he does most of the cooking and is good about tidying up the kitchen. I do all the cleaning in the rest of the house, but we have a pretty good balance between us I think.

We don’t wash/iron separately, I couldn’t be bothered with that level of separation. I work part time and DH works very long hours so we’ve always had a very traditional set up, he does outside, lawn, gardening etc (which he loves and keeps beautiful so it’s not just throwing a mower round every week) and I do inside, cleaning etc. I cook as I’m home earlier. Since ds2 came along, even though we had a very large age gap between the children it was like he could see how my work had doubled. So he’ll put washing out/away, tidy, vacuum etc if he sees something that needs doing. I feel we have a very good balance.

I do most of the housework, cooking and childcare. I'm at home while he works full time so I wouldn't expect him to come home and start doing loads, but he does do things like any DIY that need doing and it's his job to put the bins out. If he's on a day off he will do his share. But thinking about it, I do the vast majority.

I’m a SAHM and I completely get where you’re coming from. I have a 9 month old and I go to play groups 3x a week and that’s the only way I haven’t lost the will to live. I do all the washing drying and putting away I do all the cooking and the dishes I do the food shop and put it away everything you could possibly do chore wise I do but my pet peeve is that my DH leaves clothes on the floor instead of putting it in the wash basket and it drives me up the wall. Some days I struggle with it all and some days I boss it. I have asked him for help with the chores but he told me “the house is your job not mine” so I just crack on and do it all

Fuck no. Being a SAHP doesn't mean I do everything - nor should it. I'm usually out of the house with the children 10am-4pm anyway so it doesn't leave a lot of time for doing everything

I'm a SAHM to a 3yo and 1yo (3yo in nursery 2 mornings term time only). I do everything to do with food; cooking, meal planning and food shopping (and breastfeeding the 1yo). I do all child-related admin tasks and most of the childcare (obv). I vacuum most days, DH will do it if he notices it needs doing. I do most of the laundry, most of the wiping down sides/tidying up and all of the deep cleaning. I manage our finances (budget, savings, investments) and social calendar.

DH is responsible for all washing up, everything to do with the recycling and bins, and renewing stuff like insurances. He also is an active parent in the evenings and at weekends. In theory gardening is also his task but we've let the garden go to shit this summer in four of doing up the inside of our house. He also is on childcare duty first thing in the morning/gives the children breakfast (although I meal plan and prep it).

Everything else we split. Evenings and weekends, we work together to get stuff done.

If both children were at school/nursery at least some of the time, I would be doing much more I imagine. But as it stands, I do what I can without stressing and it is enough.

I did everything whilst on maternity leave, and still do now I work 4 days a week. I am exhausted. I manage it by spending an hour in the morning before everyone else gets up and then an hour or 2 in the evening doing housework/laundry/meal prep etc.

I'm a single parent. Work full time, do cooking cleaning ironing etc for me and my 2 kids. I'd rather do it all than have a piss taker getting an easy ride off me.

Is there a dry cleaners he could bring his shirts and suits to?

I used to drop exH's shirts and suits to a dry cleaners. It was a pita to find parking and wrangle small children plus half a dozen shirts back into the car when I picked it all up, but better than doing the washing and ironing myself all the same.

How quickly they develop bad habits.