NC but long term poster. Don't want linked to my normally 'strong, independent woman' posts.

My DP is away is away on business. Happens about once a month, normally just a cheapish hotel near whatever city he's in. This twice annual 'business' trip is in a gorgeous stately home where they do 'team building', but really just an excuse to get drunk and play golf.

I don't know why but I'm really anxious about it. So many stories on here about people having work affairs. Think it's partly down to me feeling rubbish about how I look as I've put on weight and he looked amazing when he left.

I feel so insecure and have already asked him who will be there so I'm trying to stop myself acting even more psychotic. He's just had a promotion whereas whereas I'm bottom of the career ladder because I've been bringing up the children.

I know you can't stop someone cheating. Early in our relationship when we argued he messaged other women. We worked through that and I honestly have no reason to doubt him now, it's plain insecurity because I've not been looking after myself.

Please help me give my head a wobble.