Off on hoilday with the in laws in a week... could you do it?

[tightwad]

Could you? For 2 weeks?

I am single so have no pil's, I am going on hol with my SIL this year though. Week in disney with DD and DN. Am quite looking forward to it, we get on fine and I think we'll have a laugh

My SIL is my perfect holiday person-we want the same things.

We've been away with the ILs, for a few days (only) and def not our main holiday.

It is OK, as we're the only ones with DCs so I just do what I want to do, and make it clear anyone who wants to join us is more than welcome, but we will be going at, say, 9.30, and we won't be hanging around while everyone else has their leisurely breakfast. Equally, I don't begrudge them their lie-in or long brunch, so it has worked quite well so far.

Although I did have to fight the irritation when (childless, mid-30's) BIL and SIL started acting like 8 year olds on holiday with their parents - I think that family holidays can cause everyone to regress (under the guise of 'relaxing') to when they were children and mum & dad were in charge and did all the thinking for them!

I went with the In-laws, SIL & BIL, nephew and DP's aunt when I'd only been with DP for 4 months - nothing like a baptism of fire! Florida, 2 weeks, big old villa and we took for 3 days to Disney on our own (villa was in Tampa). Id do it again in a shot, though nephew is now 17 and we have 2 DC too.

We go away with ILs as they pay but there's no such thing as a free lunch - we have to "sing for our supper" if you like - egs

FIL wants DH to play tennis with him (even though DH doesn't play the rest of the year and FIL plays almost every day when weather is good enough so DH doesn't exactly ENJOY playing with his dad)

They are used to long leisurely lunches with starter, main, pudding and then maybe a nice espresso afterwards. Toddlers don't do long lunches IME so we're left trying to scarf our food and field DS

So it's not ideal but lovely to get away and we couldn't afford the hols they take us on.

That said was saying to a mate today, once you have kids, until they're much older, expecting to have a HOLIDAY can be troublesome as you have to do all the childcare jobs you do at home but with limited resources (even when you s/cater)

Have a nice time OP, eh?

Before DC's, I resisted going away with the ILs for similar reasons to champagnesupernova - DH's family do 'men's' activities (playing or watching sport and drinking) and 'women's' activities (childcare). And neither of us wanted to spend a holiday away from each other!

But with the DCs, it works better as it gives us all a combined interest, so the IL's tend to stick together more now, when we go with them.

Never! Did a weekend when DD1 was 2 and I was pregnant with DD2. It was awful! Mil is so domineering and even had a look at our room before we arrived to see if it was nicer than hers (in a hotel) and swapped rooms! Have never done it again even though she used to hint all the time. She gave up after 4 years of us making excuses!

I've got 5 weeks to finish getting my head around going to Lanzarote for two weeks where my pils, younger sil, older sil and older sil's 3 yo ds all live.

Each has their own difficulties, and some can be overcome. My mil, for e.g., is lovely but always tries to finish my sentences for me. I am 34 years old, educated to PostGrad level and am quite eloquent, thanks.

Pil is a pompous know it all PITA who can be a nightmare when he gets a bee in his bonnet. DH can be equally stubborn, so when they clash, it can be epic.

Older sil is a female version of her father, and now has her PFB. No dad around because sil oopsed him and then dumped him.

Younger sil is the one I have the biggest issue with. She's in her early 30's but more has the mentality of a 12yo. CANNOT be in a room with you without striking up a conversation - even if both people are reading their book. Who the hell wants a boring conversation about whether Eastenders was good the evening before when you've got your current, carefully chosen book in front of you instead?!?! And she's the "baby" of the family, even though both pils say that she was never treated any different to her siblings.

Anyhow, 5 weeks till we fly out there, and 7 weeks till we get back!!

My sis cracks me up. She goes on hols with her ex-MIL, (Divorced 11 years ago at age 29), she now has a new MIL whom she loathes, so her and current DP go on hols with ex-MIL, who is a hoot, and whom her current DP adores.

I'll be doing this in a couple of weeks! Going to the US for SIL's wedding. Then spending a week at the beach with my PIL. I'll be 6 months pregnant so am not planning on doing much except reading. I have made my DH promise that we will do stuff on our own and not spend every second with his parents. I love them very much but they get on my nerves after a while. My BIL is coming too and he is a good laugh so I think that this will be quite fun.

Although tbh, it's the wedding part that will be stressful - SIL is the bride from hell - everything is a massive stress, she's very grabby, materialistic and not really a very nice person to be around sometimes and her mum just runs around after her worrying herself silly. Once she's finally got married (after moaning for years about how she 'deserves' to be married and how it's not fair we got married before her even though she was single when we got engaged...) and been packed on on honeymoon I think it will get a whole lot better!

I haven't, and don't think I could. They're lovely but I would go insane with the "you're a bit quiet dear", "would you like the loo before we leave" etc etc etc. I can't bear to snap as it's like turning on a small kitten.

But DH and I went with my parents for a week last year - primarily because they asked, but also because they paid for us to stay at a super fancy hotel (shallow). Even then though, DH and I needed time to ourselves but they were good about this. My parents are lovely but get on my nerves unless it's in small doses. Unfortunately as we live in Oz, and they in the UK, our time together now tends to be big doses instead.

This year though we will have new DC to distract them with.

Funny thing is, I actually think they find me slightly irritating too as we are really not that similar.

My mind went to VERY strange places with "turning on a small kitten", there.

We visit my in-laws (800 kms away) once or twice a year, and always have to stay with them, which means their 19 year old sleeping on the sofa, poor thing - they won't hear of us staying in a hotel. And then we have to do Family Activities.

Going away would be hard. They're lovely, but they have grown children, their idea of a holiday centres around big long elaborate meals (fine, lovely, but we have a toddler who is pretty wellbehaved in that she'll sit still and eat nicely for at least 20 minutes) and drinking.

They also tend to forget or ignore safety stuff; when we visited them and our daughter was a year old, they went out and bought a car seat for her, and were all excited about it. They also bought a stroller for her younger cousin (6 months) as we were bringing ours.

Get there, find out that car seat has been bought from second hand shop for $10 and is a long way short of safety standards. Find this out at airport, in dark, with no alternative.

On second day, go out with cousin, take both strollers. Find out that "specially bought" stroller has no straps. Spend a long time trying to persuade me that I should swap strollers with them so the younger child can have the safe one. Er, no. Mine can stand up and wriggle out of a stroller, yours can't, plus, I paid extra baggage fare to lug mine over. SIL wasn't asking, by the way, this was entirely MIL.

I'm pretty laid back, but my desire to have a holiday which does not involve fatal risks to my toddler and centres around something more than just eating out a lot clashes with their desire to sit around, get drunk and shout about politics for the least cost possible.

Well, we're going away for a few days with my parents when they're here later in the year. Our new PFB will be 3 months old...

My mum's suggestion for dinner? To leave the baby in the room while we go downstairs, if he's asleep - or "You could bring him down in the pram if you really wanted to".

No, that's fine, I'll just leave my precious tiny baby alone in a hotel room while I gaily have dinner 7 floors away.

I know it's just a different generation. Apparently when I was 7 months old I was driven to the south of france just placed on the back seat in a carry cot.

They clearly think I am a paranoid loon though, whereas in general I think of myself as quite carefree.