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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Signs your long-term relationship is petering out

351 replies

Tesla · 01/06/2010 01:58

If your partner of 8 years lives many miles away and when he comes to visit stays a week or so, but ignores you most of the time, does not wish to go out anywhere with you and now claims he can't sleep in the same bed with you because he's become allergic to the perfume you're wearing -when you don't wear any - and also responds to the question, "Are we still a couple or not?" with either, "I refuse to answer that/ I don't want you to know", also does not phone you, takes days to respond to text messages and then only brief/succinct, emails only in response and then never,ever, ever signs off with any sentiments such as miss you, love you, etc. Never sends birthday, Valentine, Christmas cards or presents, claims to be too busy to stay at Christmas, and can't afford to drive down to see you because he's skint, or when he does visit, it might be very irregular such as for a week, then nothing for 6 months, then another few days, then nothing for a couple of months, and you never know when he'll next visit nor will he commit to any kind of regular visits,...

does it means he's just not that into you anymore, his love long since faded, and you're just hanging on out of stupidity? Should you just bear the heartbreak and dump him and find a new man who actually wants to be with you, love you and cherish you?
especially if there's young kdis involved?

I've tried every measure going to keep communication alive in this long-distance relationship and pine for him when he's not here but can hardly bear the anxiety anymore of never knowing when he'll next visit. I'm utterly in love and always have been, so how can I get him to communicate with me and reassure me he still loves and wants me, depite the distance.

I've asked for an occassional "Hang in there, I know you miss me, I'll see you soon" but he refuses to give me even that tiny morsel of reassurance

I'm slowly becoming heartbroken, I feel like the most important relationship in my life is slipping into history.

OP posts:
LadyintheRadiator · 01/06/2010 21:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EleanorHandbasket · 01/06/2010 21:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Fliight · 01/06/2010 21:51

I didn't realise you were pg, Lady! how lovely.

i have HEAPS of girl names for you...and a few frocks I ought to offload before I get carried away with someone unsuitable!

maduggar · 01/06/2010 21:51

I agree Eleanor she really needs help

PortiaNovmerriment · 01/06/2010 21:52

I think Tesla is claiming to be this journo.

Fliight · 01/06/2010 21:53

I am desperate for this thread to stay, now.

He or she can't hide their fuckwittery that easily. It gets to stick around and be admired for a loooong time.

I might print out the thread and use it to wipe my bottom with, actually. Many times.

maduggar · 01/06/2010 21:53

I seriously doubt thats who they are! Wishfull thinking maybe.

ClaireDeLoon · 01/06/2010 21:54

I think MNHQ should just change the thread title to 'signs you're a lame fucker who never gets laid'

EleanorHandbasket · 01/06/2010 21:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

SteveLada · 01/06/2010 21:54

I've made around £400 just sitting here girls!

Don't forget the troll policy. Never never never let anyone know you suspect. Better one person be helped than 1000 made to feel sick eh!

And best of all, you're keeping me & my sockies in Bailey's.

Cheers!

Undertone · 01/06/2010 21:55

It's like the online equivalent of a flasher.

Bit sick in the head. Delusions of importance. Makes women laugh contemptuously or feel queasy.

That's what you are: a sad, saggy-balled flasher, who giggles and gurns to himself in his filthy raincoat, getting overexcited at importuning other people.

I'd go on, but I realise this is why you do it - to get a reaction. how does it feel to only be able to stimulate a reaction of pity and contempt, loser that you are?

LadyintheRadiator · 01/06/2010 21:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wukter · 01/06/2010 21:57

I don't know many men who drink Baileys.

Just an observation.

ClaireDeLoon · 01/06/2010 21:58

Gone down in the world, from a tesla to a lada in a matter of minutes.

maduggar · 01/06/2010 21:58

lol @ this thread being worth £400

Fliight · 01/06/2010 21:58

Can we ignore these shitters and just talk about something else?

Fliight · 01/06/2010 21:59

Oh same fucking bloke, he's mixed up the letters, how clever.

winnybella · 01/06/2010 22:00

400 quid - yeah, right.

You're hilarious.

Conundrumish · 01/06/2010 22:01

If he is that guy on Facebook, you'd imagine he would have quite a lot of spare time in the evenings .

PortiaNovmerriment · 01/06/2010 22:02

That journo also refers to mumsnet on the subject of the John Lewis advert, and concludes "She's every man's fantasy. And sadly ? if the women who confessed to weeping over their TV sets at the sight of her don't get a grip of themselves ? it looks like she might well be the future."

They clearly spend a lot of time here and despise us.

winnybella · 01/06/2010 22:02
Grin
ShirleyKnot · 01/06/2010 22:05

uh

Fancy a fuck Dave?

PortiaNovmerriment · 01/06/2010 22:06

Here's another one

PortiaNovmerriment · 01/06/2010 22:08

And here

Iggisfulloftayto · 01/06/2010 22:08

Do you think this is what he dreamt of becoming when he sat wanking writing poetry in his bedroom at 17?