How do you know when you actually 'love' someone?

[overmydeadbody]

Especially in a new relationship, how do you know when you truly love someone and the relationship has progressed, and how do you differenciate this love from the feeling of being 'in love' which can happen even when you don't actually know the person

I know 'being in love' is't real love, and don't believe in love at first sight or any of that bollox, but what is real love and hoe do you know when you truly love someone?

What's the defining moment? Or is it a gradual thing? Is it enogugh just to think "I love him" and therefore accept that you do? Or is it more complex? Because sometimes we think we love someone but actually we don't don't wE?

I think to be honest we both knew we loved each other without having said it if you know what I mean. If he hadn't have done I am certain I would have done not long after, wuss or not!

We have to risk, we just have to. Nothing or nobody is ever going to be perfect. But if you can lose yourself in somebody for a few moments it's a good feeling and there's nothing wrong with it, it's okay.

Showing or wanting love isn't necessarily being vulnerable.

omdb the way I see it is what have you actually got to lose by telling him. If you love him anyway, and in the unlikely event he doesnt'love you, none of that will change by you telling him. You will feel hurt anyway. If you tell him in all likelihood he will respond and things will deepen.

thanks guys, really helpful advice actually. Baskingseals you are right, we have to risk, we just have to. You are right, it doesn't mean being vulnerable, not always.

Allegrayou are right too, I am nodding along to all your advice, putting it into practice might take me a while but I have nothing to loose.

This thred has really helped me get my head round this whole 'love' business. I have never had a relationahip as good as the one I am in now, and am just overthinking it all.

allow yourself to enjoy it, your confidence in your own feelings will reassure him.

It's all good. If you have accepted yourself I don't think you have too much to fear.

Smell those flowers!

I'm smelling them Basking!

Thank you, I'm off to bed now.

Thank you all for this wonderful thread!