Actually, I think it's just happened.
He phoned me, drunk, and I said that I was fed up. I said he'd let me down and now I had to let my grandad down because I now have to do the school runs. So he then got belligerent and started suggesting that we were going back to ten years ago - when I used to get screaming angry when he pulled an all-nighter, phone him and yell, leave messages (he'd turn his phone off). But the thing is, I stopped doing that because I stopped caring where he was or if he was shagging someone. I stopped caring.
I said we were going back to ten years ago, because look what he was doing.
So then he started all that crap about how it wasn't his intention to be out it's always not his intention - and therefore I suppose his logic is that it's not his fault.
So he was uming and ahing about whether he was going to stay out all night (sleep in the car. ) or whether he was going to come home. He said he'd keep his phone on - oh how good of him and phone me in an hour. I said no chance! By that time it will be 9pm, then by the time I've collected you and got back it will be 1030, I'm not having the kids in the back of the car that late!
Then he started his manipulative shit about how I'm at fault, oh here we go, oh this is what it is, oh I understand now...
So I said you know what, stay out. In fact, don't bother coming back at all.
And I put the phone down.
I think I'm done. I really do. I've had it.
I've been married to him for 12 years. He has always gone and done whatever he wants. He pulls all nighters, he drinks, he decides where the money goes. We've been married for 12 years - we haven't made love for the last 10! He doesn't want to. He can't relax. He has to have everything running smoothly in life before he can think about sex. There's always something not right, something that demands his mental attention. And does it matter that the last 10 years have left me feeling like a bug ugly heffer? My own husband doesn't want to make love to me and I'm supposed to accept that and now, after TEN years of enforced celibacy, if I say that this is not making me happy, he tells me to be patient - WHAT???? I think TEN YEARS is patient enough for anyone.
What man can't ever, under any circumstances, make love not even ONCE in a decade because his house isn't nice enough, or the bank balance isn't big enough or he hasn't met whatever criteria he's set himself. Oh and then there's his ace - he accuses me of being shallow and asks would I leave him if he was in an accident and unable to have sex ever again.
tbh, what would be the bloody difference?! But I'm shallow for wanting a marriage and I'm impatient for only waiting a mere decade.