I am a grown woman, yet I have a teenage crush on someone. Smack it out of me please.

[Operation]

I feel like a complete eejit, I am practically at the stage of writing K. I. S. S. I. N. G rhymes and doodling hearts all over my exercise book with our initials linked with a 4. (ok it's a little more x rated than that)

I am single, with children. He is someone who has done some work on my house. He is the first person I have felt an attraction to in years; I shut down that side of myself when with exh.

We always chat and banter when we see each other but I am almost certain there is nothing behind it from his POV; he is just a friendly person. I don't even know if he is single yet here I am mooning over him like a teenager.

I am also ovulating which is Not Helping. I just need to get a grip

I thought "teenage" when I first got involved with someone after ex and I split up. And thought I was being daft.
But it isn't teenage is it? It only feels that way because you probably haven't felt like that since you were a teen.
Enjoy it for what it is(n't).

so find out if he is single

nothing wrong with a crush

you can act on it if he is single

Oh dear I am with you

I have a stupid, obsessional crush on someone but i know he is married, sadly. So am trying to bash it out of myself, because it is COMPLETELY pointless!

Yours OTOH may not be. When are you seeing him next...can you engineer some more work that needs doing perhaps?

But if I do that AF then he will know I'm interested and if he isn't then I will feel like a twat next time I see him

aww, FA

sad that your crush is unavailable

if he isn't would you have to see him again?

anyway - you aren't a teenager, so you don't have to be embarrased etc about letting a bloke know you like him. If it isn't mutual then so be it.

It's my own silly fault AF I think I do it on purpose...tis far safer to fancy someone you know you'll never have to live with!

OP - I think there are ways to find out without looking like a twit. Not sure what they are, but still...do not give up

You don't have to actually ask him! There must be other ways of finding out. Google him/Facebook him. Do some light "stalking" on the internet. Does he have a limited company of his own? If so, you can easily check if the Company Secretary is his wife as is often the case!

Come on, woman - start a cover operation!

I meant "covert"

awww, FA

I wish on you a lovely available man

and you, belle

I would see him again, we bump into each other all the time.

Isn't googling him like stalking?!

And flight there I was thinking that I needed to know one way or t'other in order to get over it

AF you are great

OP I'm not sure if it helps...I think so, if you didn't know already. Depends how much you like him, and how happy he is in relationship iyswim...some men seem content and loyal and happy, some seem desperate to get out of the one they are in, which is confusing!

There are certain signals I think...

Hmm I see what you mean, must be hard knowing he is involved and still having a crush.

Now, about that googling...Can I really do that? Feels a bit 'wrong'

Of course Googling is like stalking..! It's "stalking lite". It depends if you have other ways of finding out if he's single. If you know someone who knows him, then it's easy. If not - well, you have to be more ingenious!

AF - thank you. I'd quite like one too!

Operation, no-one will know but you (and all of us). I'm a nightmare if I want to know something so I'm sorry if I'm leading you astray...

I should have been a detective. I'm bloody relentless!

< weaves magic >

There is NOTHING wrong with having a crush! How do you think us knackered old ladies get through our drab days???!

Tbh, Googling him is just part of having a crush Stalk away.

Another approach you could take is [deep breath, shoulders back] "Would you like to go out with me?" After which, if the answer is encouraging, you can ask him if he's single.

Ooh, I'm all excited for you! [cupid emoticon]

Ok I googled his name. Nothing. Well nothing that is him anyway. He has family in my street, I suppose I could befriend them

Yes, you could ask after him and his wife!

Lol, poor great aunt gladys would wonder wtf was going on

Am too scared to ask him directly, who wants to do it for me?

What, as in "Oi, my mate fancies you"?! Me, me, I'll do it!

I assume you have checked that the wedding ring finger is bare?

No ring (of course I checked that!)