Want to leave p - better now or later?

[christmasdilemma]

I want to tell p that I'm leaving him tonight. Would it be a really horrible thing to do before new year?

I've been struggling this from before xmas and had planned to wait until the new year. There'll always be something though to put it off - weddings, birthdays, committments. Before I know it'll be another year passed of living separate lives under one roof, sleeping in separate beds, no sex, no affection.

I've tried so hard to change things but he doesn't want it to be changed. I've talked until I'm blue in the face how I'm unhappy of how our relationship is heading. I've written letters and basically given him every opportunity to no avail.

Christmas has really taken the biscuit when he left me alone with ds to get pissed xmas eve and boxing day. He was too hungover to get up xmas day to open ds's presents and doesn't think it's a big deal as 'he's only 2 and won't remember'.

So tell me would it be horrible cos I'm just on the brink of packing my bag now??

There's never a good time. You can't worry about whether it's horrible or not. You know it's not horrible in the long run. At this stage, it's just survival and looking after yourself and your DS.

If he's just a bit of a selfish nob and not an abusive loon, presumably you'll still have access to paperwork and your stuff.

What the OP is trying to do is incredibly brave, and sometimes you have to seize the moment. It's too easy to lose your nerve. I left this time last year, after 2 years of trying to summon up the courage, and a couple of false starts.

Good luck hun, and let us know how you get on. You'll find a lot of brilliant support on here.