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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

has anyone got experience of being with/married to someone with a Type A personality?

52 replies

cruisemum1 · 26/10/2009 20:40

I think my dh fits this description. He has two jobs both of which demand a fair bit of his time but no more than many other Dad's I know. He gets completely and utterly stressed with minor irritations, which are part of family life, to the point of physically shaking and funing. He is not relaxing to be with. He drinks way too much way too often (2 bottles of wine per night)and then behaves like some crude little schoolboy making sexual comments and inuendos in fromt of our 11 yo dd . He can be morose, starts the day saying he wishes he was dead etc. I am afraid I have lost sympathy over teh years having witnessed some horrific displays of temper and depression. I cannot carry on like this but am too afraid to address the situatin because last time i did he trashed several of our kitchen jars/vases. He has been an absolute monster to live with over the years but I cannot put everything in the op. Can anyone offer anyhelp/support/ I am at the end of my tether and sadly sleep evades me when I need it most

OP posts:
NanaNina · 01/11/2009 18:15

Oh mathanxiety - what wise words and so succintly put.....you are so right. However unfortunately cruisemum is just not ready to take any action at this point in time, though maybe this will change over time. I think the problem is that for many women in this situation their self esteem is rock bottom and that works against taking the action they need to take - and somehow I think the abusing men more than half know this and it allows them to continue with their abusive behaviour.

mathanxiety · 01/11/2009 19:34

Amen, NanaNina, I think the abusers really do know this. But I think there's a little bit of your inner self left if you can post here and start putting it into words. I really hope Cruisemum can build on the start she has made here by just telling it like it is, and gather the strength and courage not just to live through each day (because her life now requires plenty of both, every day), but to begin to move forward and away from the cause of her unhappiness.

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