Do you phone DH at work when you are struggling?

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I will quite often phone my DH at work in tears because of some issue with the kids e.g. DS three playing up or DD 15 weeks not sleeping/crying

He is brilliant about it and I just feel I need someone to vent my frustrations at sometimes. I don't feel I am not coping over all but I do wonder if anyone else does this?

Only once. Both the dc were ill with non-stop wracking coughs and had been at it for days. They'd both had chicken pox one after the other. I think I'd been in the house looking after a sick child for something like 12 days in a row. I asked DH to try and come home early that day but he couldn't.

I posted on Mumsnet that I was on the verge of leaving them all and the lovely kind Mnet vipers held my paw and talked me through it.

Oh god yes, many times when DS was just weeks old... Had such bad PND that there were days I just couldn't face anything having got to 3pm and not even had breakfast or a shower yet.

Now I call him sometimes, sharing the pain always helps.

He's much rather know if I'm struggling anyway, rather than let him carry on at work without a clue, only to come home to frazzled me and overtired DS!

I havent for a while now but im sure the tearful phonecalls will start again soon once Ive had DC2.
We both know he cant do anything other than be understanding, give me a few words of encouragement and suggest things to do. It never bothered him and he certainly didnt/doesnt resent me doing it.
Likewise when he phones me if he is having a bad day.

Oh, I do remember another occasion when dd brought back a full bottle of milk, she was drenched, I was drenched, the sofa was drenched. I phoned him up, convinced she had something terribly wrong with her and told him HE MUST COME HOME AND TAKE US TO THE HOSPITAL STRAIGHT AWAY. Thankfully he managed to calm me down.

no
that is what my mum is for

Like Orm my DH was often up a ladder and/or using power tools. We did exchange texts and he would ring if he thougth it warranted it

I am back ft now and tbh would be livid if DH was at home with dcs and rang me to complain about it.

texting is another matter

I only would if totally desperate as his workplace is not great for him to take personal calls. But I do email him (tho usually not mid-crisis but a bit later of course, it's too hard to email when DS is playing up!) and then he can reply when he gets a chance.

No, I never do. We have 3dc (7,4,17 months) and im pregnant (28 weeks).

He has his job, i have mine.

Actually, I rang him once, last week. My ds1 is ASD and i literally couldn't stop him hurting himself/the other dc, due to my bump size and i wondered if he was nearly home.

in tears, no but I did phone him at work to have a rant (not blame him) when the kids were being a nightmare.

Thank god for f/t school and working 33hrs pw! I no longer experience the horror

Yes, I did when the children were small, both angry and in tears. It was really just to vent, and it did help.

I think it also helped the children to realise we were working together.

Don't feel guilty, they are his DC too - just because he's not there

Sometimes, but then I phone him to say hi briefly anyway - he's an academic and in an office on his own reading a lot of the time, so I think he enjoys the distraction!

I have done, in the past when the dc were very little.

Like quite a few other dh, his work can involve being up a ladder, with power tool etc. So he would ring me straight back, when it was safe.

Just him listening on the other end of th phone was enough. And tbh, dh has since admitted he sometimes thought mat leave was a bit cushy But those phone calls were a reality check. And most def shared the burden.

I would've sent texts instead, but dh never reads them.

Well, we both work now. But when I was on maternity leave? No, never. I just wouldn't.

god i remember having a huge row with dh on the phone - he was working security and between him sleeping and working there was little help if any

we had an almighty row after he phoned me

so i got the kids in the car drove to his work ( he worked alone) and threw the phone at him with the words

"you can't fucking phone me now can you"

and off i drove home

Yes I have done

With the specific instruction to bring alcohol home with him

I did today poor dh.

I have never rang him at work, but to be fair, he wasn't around when they were little (not their dad)

He has also spent the last 2+ years working abroad and it wouldn't have helped much

Moan at him when he gets home lots though!!!

I do if I am struggling physcially, oftne he will try and get home early o he can do dinner or walk the dog or bascially just let me go and ahve a lie down.

I did it a few times when mine were little and i was feeling at the end of my tether. I didn't make a habit of it and I don't think he ever resented it. Him listening to me for a minute or two made me feel less overwhelmed - they are his children too ....

I asked him to come home early once or twice

i have called him... once when i'd been literally on my own with DS 6m at time, everyday for 2 months, not been out for up to 10 week stretch, (his country) i defrosted frigging GOAT, and not whatever it was I was hoping it to be.

I'd never cooked goat in my life, was seriously miserable anyway and I rang him.. in absolute bits!

God bless him he talked me through the whole prep and then said stick it into the oven at xpm, and I'll be making tracks about an hour later... so will help get it onto the plates.

Give your DH an extra special cuddle for being there for you, he's a good man there!

`Dh calls me at work when domestic stuff gets too much.
I suck it up but HATE IT.
He has no concept of how demanding my job is

Yes, I made a fair few tearful phone calls when I had ds nearly 3 years ago. And despite all his abusive behaviour (we have since split up) XP actually came home early on a couple of occassions to help me and he took ds out so I could have some peace and a shower.