Is this it then - bored and slightly sad until I die?

[retiredlady]

We have lived in Northamptonshire for nearly 20 years now and my husband took early retirement 4 years ago.

Our two daughters have left the family home to follow their careers and we just seem to sit here ticking off the days and weeks waiting to die. We both do voluntry sector work but are very much aware that the moment we stop doing this type of work the organisations involved will simply forget all about us.

We wondered if moving closer to my two sisters might be the answer in terms of seeing people that are actually interested in us?

I am close to tears as I write this and I hardly ever cry. Can somebody please suggest a possible escape route?

Not sure what your interests are but my 64 year old aunt has learnt how to 'pot' and has had made a fabulous dinner service for every member of the family and made chess sets out of resin and wood. She rocks.

It was me that made that comment! I am very proud, thanks RetiredLady!

Please come back sooner, a few months is too long.

And hang out on some other threads as well, not just this one.

you sound as if you are stuck in a relationship that has gone well off the boil. Comfortable when you had your girls around you as they were your world. But now they have fled the nest,the relationship you had with DH when you were younger has turned slightly dull and sounds as though it has gone stale and a bit boring...you are my age ... there is so much to do out there hobby wise..are you sporty?

You need to change your mindset. And I'd start by changing your posting name.

It sounds like you're just sitting there, empty and lonely, waiting to die ...

Of course there's more to your life! Stop behaving like you're in your 70s and behave like you're in your 50s instead.

There are lots of here who are older parents (I have just turned 50) so you won't be alone!

You need to start to have fun. Start behaving badly. Break out of the prison you seem to have placed yourself in. You are free of the restraints that young children impose upon you. Enjoy your liberation!

Absolutely- agree with the preivous post.

If voluntary work is not rewarding, do something that is! You sound as if you expect the world to fall at your feet- both the groups you help out with and your relatives. If you do voluntary work, the reward should come from the recipients and your own self of achievement- not just the organisers.

Now that the general pension age is rising ot 67-ish, you could have a decade and more of working life left in you- you are in your 50s, not your 70s or 80s!

I know friends who have gone back to uni at 50, others have gone into teacher training, others have left their DHs and gone round the world.

You sound old- you need to change your mental attitude and take life by the scruff of the neck.

What exactly do you want out of it? Just do it!

I really don't understand how anyone can be bored and sad when there is a huge world to explore.
God how I wish my hubby could retire in 10 years time ( in his mid fifties), we've lived and travelled all over the world when he was in the Airforce and we have replaced that constant upheaval with stability but with lots of holidays to compensate.
In the past 2 years we've been to Mexico, Egypt, America, we've just returned from a week in Disneyworld, just the 2 of us - you would be surprised at the amount of older couples there "sans kids".
Join or volunteer with the National trust?
We joined this year and have made great use of our membership.

We've got to wait until he's 60 to get his airforce pension then we'll be off in a motorhome around Australia, assuming good health of course.

You only have one life - make the most of it!