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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Vasectomies....

45 replies

nikki1978 · 18/05/2009 21:16

My DH is having this done on Wednesday afternoon. The nurse told him that between the operation and the first sample he needs to give in 3 months he needs to empty what sperm he has left and that it is about 150 ejaculates! Is this right? If it is I am going to be sore

P.S I was in the room when she said this so he is not pushing his luck

OP posts:
Mutt · 18/05/2009 21:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BCNS · 18/05/2009 21:19

buy him a pressy and wrap it up in a bow for him on wednesday afternoon .. when he gets home...

KY and a box of tissues .. oh you could get a clicker counter too

Original poster
nikki1978 · 18/05/2009 21:25

Yeah I know he just says why have the burger when you have steak at home. I think he has wanked about 10 times in the 9 years we have been together - honestly! We do have sex a lot though but 2 times a day most days for the next 3 months might be too much for me and my lady garden. He says he feels sad doing it by himself. I'm sure he will get over himself though

Either way my question was more is this true about vasectomies?

OP posts:
Mutt · 18/05/2009 21:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeinzSight · 18/05/2009 21:30

150 times!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is there any info on the net?

psychomum5 · 18/05/2009 21:34

my DH has had a vasectomy and he was not told this.

he was told that it would take about 6mths for his body to be free of all sperm, but it is to do with 'shelf-life' and make-ability, not use-it-up-ability (hoping you understand what I mean).

ie, he does not need to use it up having sex as it will die off anyway in that time, and then he can do a sample to ensure it has died off.

having said that, it did take DH a year to have a clear sample, so maybe the nurse is right, and you DO need to have sex that often to use it up......

norksinmywaistband · 18/05/2009 21:35

I think this amount seems more realistic

norksinmywaistband · 18/05/2009 21:37

When DH had his he was told about 40 times in 3 months, much more realistic imo.
150 - I would tell him to get used to burger( horrid phrase BTW)

Original poster
nikki1978 · 18/05/2009 21:41

He IS gorgeous actually :p

40 does sound more realistic

OP posts:
Original poster
nikki1978 · 18/05/2009 21:44

norksinmywaistband did your DH get the all clear straight away BTW? Just want to be sure the 40 times theory is right!

OP posts:
wiggletastic · 18/05/2009 21:45

My DH had his vasectomy on Friday and was told to ejaculate about twice a week to 'clear the sperm from the tubes'. He is currently walking like John Wayne and moaning every time he moves so I think it will be a while before there is any ejaculating by any means.

norksinmywaistband · 18/05/2009 21:46

Yep all clear first time, but had the second sample a week later to check.

And believe me even achieving 40 was a problem as he had some complications post surgery - make sure your DH rests for a while post surgery

Original poster
nikki1978 · 18/05/2009 21:46

BTW the burger, steak words were not his exact words Can't remember what he said but in the end he means he would rather shag me than wank which is sweet in a weird way . I don't think he would really put me through that sort of abuse lol.

OP posts:
psychomum5 · 18/05/2009 21:47

please don;t tell me it is 40 after all.........DH would then have been right in his complaint about not enough sex

FigmentOfYourImagination · 18/05/2009 21:49

DH and I are seriously thinking about a vasectomy.

FigmentOfYourImagination · 18/05/2009 21:49

How did you come to the decision ?

norksinmywaistband · 18/05/2009 22:02

I was very poorly after the birth of my 2 DC, in surgery post section with DS, the consultant said please do not do this again.
Dh booked himself in a week later

Original poster
nikki1978 · 18/05/2009 22:10

We are very happy with our two and have decided our family is complete. We had a near miss a couple of months ago and I decided we had better go for it. I don't use the pill or anything that puts hormones into my system as it makes me nervous and DH hates condoms then one broke and we realised we were running out of options.

We had the counselling session today and she talked about one of the children dying or me dying but we agreed that we didn't want to 'replace' anyone and DH says he would not want to have kids with anyone else.

Yes it is very final (particularly with the NHS op he is having where they don't just snip and seal the tubes they actually remove part of it) but we feel it is a risk worth taking.

OP posts:
psychomum5 · 18/05/2009 22:13

for us it was the simple logostics of five, plus the fact that I actually almost died after DS2 (retained plactenta that they missed, then during the ERPC I suffered an allergic reaction to the drugs and they needed to rescuss me on the table), terrified DH so much he booked in and had it done when DS2 was 7wks

FigmentOfYourImagination · 18/05/2009 22:23

Thanks girls

I can't use hormonal contraception either (for health reasons) and we have 3 children between us already (2 from his first marriage, 1 from ours). I am 97% sure that we're done having kids.

He is ambivalent about having anymore but would have another if it was what I really wanted. The fact is that I don't think I do want anymore. I was young (20) when I had DD (very much planned and adored) and originally we'd planned to have 2 but we never got around to it. The further away I get from the nappies stage (DD is almost 7) the less inclined I am to go back. That is something I don't envisage changing. Our other 2 kids are 17 next week and 15.5 so they are almost men now.

FigmentOfYourImagination · 18/05/2009 22:25

sorry for slight hijack, nikki

Original poster
nikki1978 · 19/05/2009 07:23

Hmmm I think you need to be a bit more sure than you are before you go ahead. After all you did plan for two and you are still young.

OP posts:
FabulousBakerGirl · 19/05/2009 07:25

That sounds bollocks to me.

My DH got the all clear after 3 months and I am not even sure we had got to double figures never mind triple.

97% sure?? I wouldn't do it.

tegan · 19/05/2009 07:39

dh had his done 5 weeks ago and he wasn't told any of this, just to use contraception until we have the all clear

jellybeans · 19/05/2009 07:48

I am pretty much 100% sure but it still seems a hard decision. I have 5 DC now and lost 2 DDs after 20 weeks and 2 early m/c so pregnancy is always very hard/high risk with injections cervical stitches etc. I also almost bled to death after my 2nd c section, and I have had another section since...3 is enough really as I have alot of scar tissue. I also know that you can never replace a child..ever..but after loosing DDs, I was desperate to be pregnant again and having another DC really really helped but I guess it's different if it's an already born child? I think what I worry about is that you never really know how you are going to feel in hypothetical situations unless you are really there.