Ok, will try and keep it short, my husband left 3 months ago, things not good between us, both unhappy (although he now denies this), I couldnt carry on as we were, he moved out to his parents. We have two DC who live in the FMH with me (under the age of 5). I have continued to look after DC, pay mortgage, bills, etc and run house and work. We arranged that he would collect children from childcare on the days I work (2 days) and I would collect DC from him on my way home from work. He also wanted them one night overnight at weekend which we agreed.
Money has been an issue, he has paid me £400 since he left (equates to £36 per week!). I have also had to ASK for this and he has not been happily willing to give this. No financial help towards childcare costs, mortgage, etc, but thats fine, I can manage and have done (which I think pees him off).
In last few weeks my FIL has been ill and died due to illness, all very sudden and devastating for all concerned. As ex is living at parents he was involved round the clock and all previous childcare arrangements were put to one side - which I understood (although two young children dont understand I kept things ticking for them).
For about 4-5 weeks now he has had children as and when, 2 hours here, 4 hours there, not overnight for 4 weeks, tells me he will bring back at a certain time and either bring them back 2 hours before or 2 hours later (no phone call or text to let me know).
A situation arose whereby my DD couldnt be in school and he looked after her, taking her back to FMH - he still has keys, still lets himself in as and when he pleases, etc (p*sses me off but he is legally entitled I know this). So he took DD back to FMH, I rang to check she was ok, conversation turned to him saying I was ill, he has "decided" I am bi polar, told me he is taking things from the house and then he will burn it down, im in work at the time, he is at MY house with DD, I put phone down so conversation couldnt get worse.
He rang me back 5 minutes later asking what was wrong with me?!?!?! I told him not to speak in front of DD and I put phone down again. On returning home he was there with DC, then left 5 minutes after I arrived saying we needed to talk, I arrranged to meet with him one day to talk about things - after he had left I realised he had taken things from the house, electrical items mainly - he hadnt told me or asked, when I rang him he simply said very smugly "they are mine" - which is actually not 100% true, they were purchased on credit cards in my name or with Paypal in my name on my credit card. I asked what the children were supposed to watch now and he said "put a dvd on in their bedroom" - how nice.
Question is, I know he is "legally" allowed to have a key and access to house, but is he allowed to remove things from the house? I have asked him to be reasonable about coming to the house, ie by arrangement, etc, I have to put the latch on when im home alone "just in case" he turns up, I could be in bath or dressing, etc. Its all very unsettling, unerving and im not comfortable or happy with it and the more I ask him to be reasonable the more he knows its p*sses me off so he is unreasonable.
I dont know where to start or what to do, we are waiting for mediation but they have just offered an appointment in 3 weeks, and thats just the first joint meeting - I cant wait that long!!!!
HELP