What if anything should I do?

[insertwittynicknameHERE]

I have a friend, she is also a neighbor. Ours is a relatively new friendship. But I do feel like we have a very close friendship already.

She has confided in me some things about her life, which by all means hasn't been an easy one. I like to think that she can talk to me about anything and for me to listen.

Lately I have noticed that she is drinking a huge amount, not just in the evenings but all day.

She has a DD under the age of 1yo (I don't want to put specifics just in case she is a Mner, although I don't think she is)

Her DH is obviously worried about her drinking (as am I) as he has just popped here to see if there is anything I can do and to get some advice from me.

He has come home from work today (I only walked in the house about 45 minutes ago myself) and she is almost passed out on the sofa. She has had 3 bottles of wine since I saw her this morning and then gone out to get another once her DH had come home.

She has told me before that she will drink every day/night, but that she is not worried about it. She just doesn't like the fact that her DH doesn't like her drinking.

I don't know what, if anything, I should/could do.

I am worried for her and worried for her DD when she is alone in the day.

Any advice would be welcome please.

If she has PND ss will still help. As has been mentioned, they don't just sweep in and take the child. They will investigate the situation and try to help.

You have done the right thing and you should feel proud that you have helped the child get what is best for them... A safe, nurturing environment is that child's right. The mother needs help and you have started the first steps in her getting it.

Well done.
x

Let's get a bit of perspective here. Social Services aren't sitting there, waiting for the slightest excuse to go in and stomp all over everything and everyone. They'll work with the Health Visitor and/or GP so if it is PND, it'll be recognised and addressed.

Nevertheless, the priority here has got to be the safety and well-being of the child. A possible diagnosis of PND doesn't mean that this woman's drinking habits and volatility suddenly becomes acceptable or any less of a problem or risk.

PND, or past abuse, or other mental health issues may be underlying and contributory causes for her drinking but the reasons for what she's doing are, frankly, her business. The effects of that drinking on her child are the chief concern here, surely. Moreover, those kinds of contributory causes are impossible to address if she's spending most of her time drunk.

You still did the right thing.

Well, I suppose calling SS is still a good idea even if PND is the issue. You may want to tailor your interactions with her a bit differently than if she were simply an alcoholic though.

Well done insertwitty. Of course it feels shitty, and you can expect your friend to possibly be devastated in the short term, but you have done the right thing for the child

Snorbs another great post