Ok so I posted ages ago that my dh had an affair while I was pg with dc3. I found out over the xmas/new year period and kicked him out. He then swore he had finished with her. Things have been very amicable recently and he has had no limits on contact with the dc even coming round for dinner several times a week and has spent a lot of time talking to me.
I saw a solicitor and said I wanted to start divorce proceedings. He told me it was all going too quick and that he wanted to try again.
The dc and I went away on hol on our own and he stayed at our house to get some bits done for my return. He text me telling me he loved me and told me on the phone that he was missing me etc.
I came back and everything was fine between us and we was going to go away the weekend as a family.
Sat morning while he was still in bed I heard a text come through...it wasnt my phone it wasnt his phone...put my hand in his pocket and there it was. A secret mobile phone. Full of texts from feb to the friday night and the one she had sent him that morning.
They range from porn star like stuff to how much he loves her and is only coming back for the kids and how we(me and him) will never work while he feels like he does about her. I instantly rang the ow who told me that they didnt stop seeing each other in jan like he swore he did. He didnt get rid of the other phone like he swore he did. She told me that they had still been sleeping together. She also said he wanted to meet her the day our dc3 was born but she said no(apparently she told him it was wrong and he should be with me) She said that on an occaision when we went out(1st night out together after dc3 birth) and she was there he was kissing and cuddling her in another room of the place we was out in front of a dad from our eldests school! They was even outside kissing while I was outside having a cigerette!!
I left the house as soon as I found the phone with the kids and left him in bed. He found out I had the phone and didnt ring me till last night. I cant speak to him I just cant. I cant believe he has continued with all this while lying to me. I have spoken to the ow at length and told her she is welcome to him il even sent him on to her gift wrapped if she wants! We talked about certain dates that he wasnt with me or wasnt with her and he has been lying to both of us.
The day I left after finding the phone he went straight to see her and told her I was lying and she wasnt to talk to me anymore. He has told her so much crap about me. He rang me once yest but has spent the day bonbarding her with texts saying how much he loves her and apparently when she said to him the kids are most important he told her 'no YOU are the most important person in all this'
Not really after advice I guess as im ringing my solicitor to tell her the update 1st thing tommorow. I was told their relationship starting in october turns out was august!
How can I go about arranging contact with the kids though? I seriously cant speak to him on the phone or il end up loosing it with him and dont want to do that as I havent so far in all this. He even had the cheek to call me 'darling' on the phone! I said to him il arrange all contact from now on through his mum and he is to get her to ring me..can I do this?