DH driving terrifies me

[backseatdriver]

It seems every time I got out in DH car, his driving is too fast, too close, road rage, boy race, my stomach ties in knots ans I am scared. So many times I have asked him to 'please slow down' and he won't. He hust says things like, 'whos driving, me or you' or for 'for gods sake, no-one esle is bothered by my driving'. Oh and there is ALWAYS one serious braking episode (because he is too close, too fast). Last time we aregued about this he said 'don't come in my car then.' I know that would solve everything but my vision is not that great to drive at night, plus we always have the DC with us and still he carries on like this. I think he is just a selfish pig because I would always moderate my driving if someone was afraid. For the record, I am a very confident and fast driver too the difference being I do not take chances and I am tolerant and considerate of other drivers. Advice??

I do drive sometimes but like I said, I hate driving in the dark. He swears and bad mouths everyone virtually throughout the journey, I find it so depressing, although he doesn't do the swearing bit in front of DC, I guess thats something to be grateful for.

I have many years of driving in the dark and yes I CAN do it of course I can, but I would prefer not to, also if I don't drive I can have a couple of drinks and I do mean only a couple. Am I being selfish? Maybe I should just do the driving. It does make me sad though that DH won't moderate his driving when he knows it scares me.

You sound like a pair of twits.

You both drive fast? with children in a car?

Driving fast does not make you a good driver imo-prehaps you should think about a advanced driving course to access your 'confident and fast' driving skills.

I am not a twit poshwellies, and it is disrespectful of you to suggest it. I do drive within the speed limits.

being a confident and fast driver does not mean you are safe.

i do not exceed the speed limit, especially when i have my children in the car.

would glasses help you drive at night?

you can;t be fast and within the speed limits

Well,I'm sorry-but you know your partner drives too fast,too close and has road rage and like to boy race but you allow yourself and your child to get in the car?

Why are thinking I drive TOO fast??? I did say I drive within the speed limits. I just don't LIKE night driving down the dark country lanes that we are surrounded by. Just because I am a confident driver doesn't mean I am too fast and reckless.

This sounds exactly like my DH. So no advice, but you have my sympathy!

We can't go any distance without having an argument about it. He believes that he is a "good driver" and I am being silly. I fully admit that with dd in the car I am over cautious, but I don't see why he can't stick to the speed limit just to keep me happy.

Classic theme:

Me - you're too close to that car in front. Please slow down a bit.
Him - You always drive closer to cars when you're driving.

He just doesn't get the concept of "stopping distance" ie the faster you are driving the bigger the gap needs to be. Hence I drive much more slowly so can be closer but still safe.

Argument ensues.

I too am interested in advice on this, as nothing I say seems to make a difference. Even "Yes, I know I'm neurotic about it, just humour me for God's sake!"

He's normally lovely and quite rational and it pisses me off no end that once behind the wheel he is actually HAPPY for me to be frightened rather than consider his driving is less than perfect.

you say , 'For the record, I am a very confident and fast driver too '

hence i presume you are driving over the limit, as 30 mph is not fast

I think she just meant that she's not an over-cautious Sunday driver.

I'd just drive instead of your dh, and if this isn't the only area of your relationship where he ignores and belittles you then consider relationship counselling.

my my marlasinger, your a pleasant 'lady' aren't you. Driving at 70 on the motorway is fast, but not so fast that you are breaking the law. I am NOT faster than ANY SPEED LIMIT for your information, I am just not a 'sunday driver'. I only came on here for a bit of advice really, and so far there have more than a few rude remarks. Well goodafternoon to you too LADIES!

describing yourself as a fast driver and then taking umbrage when people presume that means you drive fast is a bit

We go out most wkends with the DC and with your lavatorial like vocabulary MarlaSinger, I'm not suprised your social life is INFERIOR>

Blimey, I was going to post something sensible but am reluctant to offer any support to the OP now.

Doubt very much that someone with such a nasty temper is a safe driver.

Edam, I do not have a nasty temper at all but I do find it shocking to get 'some negative' remarks made when all I was doing was asking for some advice.

MarlaSinger, yes I am very funny. You would love me in RL.