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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

So, when it gets to the end how do you finnish it when you have no guts and just wanna cry ???

63 replies

nutcracker · 09/04/2005 22:33

If i say 'i don't love you, i want us to split', he won't believe me.

It will turn into a row and i don't want a row, haven't the energy, thinking about it is hard enough.

OP posts:
Loobie · 14/04/2005 15:52

hows things today nutty,hope all is quite.
XX

ponygirl · 18/04/2005 16:33

Hi Nutcracker, how are you? Any progress?

nutcracker · 19/04/2005 11:38

Right, have been putting off posting here cos i thought i might get shouted at but here goes.

He hasn't gone and i haven't made him. After alot of talking he decided to go and see his doctor. Last year he was perscribed ad's (much needed imo) and he wouldn't take them. I knew he was depressed and so did he but wouldn't do anything about it.
Anyway the doc told him off for not taking them and gave him some more and he is takiung them.

I have told him that this no way means we are staying together but I do want to see if this will change things. One of the major probs was that he was always in a mood and peed off about something, and the smallest things could drag him down, in turn dragging me down too.

I have told him that the relationship at the mo is on a monthly review for at least the next 6mths. If at any time during that 6 mths I decided it is over, then he will move out and go and stay with his brother.

He has agreed and so far is trying hard to make things work. I am also trying to, not spending as much time on here in the evenings and basically we are just talking alot more.

I know alot of you will think i'm mad for letting him stay and Yes i might be BUT I have to see if this will make any difference before i give up.
I know i've said i don't love him but the fact is I once risked losing my entire family for this man so obviously once i did love him, alot of things have changed since then and mostly for the worse. The fact is that since we got together other factors in our realtionship have pulled us further and further apart.
I have to be sure in my heart and my mind that us splitting up is the right thing to do, and at the mo I couldn't say i am sure.

I will apologise for what some may see as me wasting your time. I do appreciate every single bit of advice i've been given and am grateful that people cared enough to help.

Nutty xxxxxxxxx

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 19/04/2005 12:11

That sounds really good, Nutty.

SoupDragon · 19/04/2005 12:13

I don't think you've wasted anyone's time. You've discussed stuff with him that you maybe wouldn't have managed before and he's accepted that he needs to change in order to try and salvage the relationship. All positive stuff IMO.

Potty1 · 19/04/2005 12:15

Nutty - you have to be sure that you've done all you can to save your relationship especially when there are children involved. You sound like you are doing just that. Hope it works out for you.

How's dd BTW?

vict17 · 19/04/2005 12:34

well done nutty Perhaps this will lead to you falling in love with him all over again. Hope so.

snafu · 19/04/2005 12:36

Really positive, nutty. Loads and loads of luck.

nutcracker · 19/04/2005 12:43

Ahhhh thanks you lot . Was so worried everyone would be mad at me

Potty - Dd is a bit better thanks. All her blood results were clear so now i just have to wait until her next hospital appointment which is the end of may (unless g.p gets it moved forward).
She is still going slightly blue and freezing cold but the blueness isn't as bad now.
Thanks for asking.

OP posts:
wild · 19/04/2005 12:51

good luck

ponygirl · 19/04/2005 13:45

I agree, I think it's positive steps, and certainly agree that you have to try everything and be absolutely sure before you take an irrevocable step. Whatever happens, though, please keep us posted, 'cos I'm sure we'd all like to help if we can. Shout at you?? How could we!

Socci · 24/04/2005 17:22

Message withdrawn

charliecat · 24/04/2005 17:49

Sounds good Nutty...hope it works out for you all xx

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