Why do YOU drink??

[Toothache]

I've put this in the relationship section as I think it's really about the relationship I have with alcohol.

I drink for a couple of reasons:

For fun when I'm socialising
For relaxation sitting watching TV with DH...

These reasons are fine to me, but my third reason is what worries me.

I drink to forget. Nothing specific as such, just sometimes I drink when I've had arguments with DH or my Mother (more and more these days). I don't get slaughtered, but I drink just enough to make me either forget about my troubles or gloss over them!
I don't drink every night, but throughout my life I have used alcohol as a numbing agent.... hiding from things. When I was a 17 year old I was hiding from a broken heart. As a student I was hiding from the reality of my debt.... and now??? The reality of an unhappy marriage. We are working at it and want to make it work, but as we wait for marriage counselling to get back to us with regular appointments I find myself sitting at this PC more and more evenings with a bottle of wine.

I'm not an alcoholic.... and this thread isn't really about that. I just wondered how many people out there could admit that sometimes they drink to forget... for a while. Am I in the minority? Do most people just drink a few glasses of wine to unwind or just to socialise with friends?

Or is drinking to unwind just another way of using alcohol to forget about the stresses in life??

Just thinking. Feel free to ignore... I'm a bit tipsy!

I know - single malt please !!!!

Toothache -- believe me, I never stop after one glass unless I'm driving. But the first glass is the best, just like I remember the first cigarette being.

No I don't mix champagne and whiskey

lavenderrr - I now I can live without it when I'm pregnant. 1st pregnancy I drank a couple of glasses of red wine a week. 2nd pregnancy NOWT! Gave me heartburn so just avoided it. Now dd is 7 mths old I'm back to drinking 2/3 nights a week!

Oh God, that bloody Wig&Robe person was always going on about her penchant for Scotch!

I missed all that W&R thing at the time...
I went to Scotland and visited many distilleries and now have a collection of single malts.... now off to bed !

What was the story there? I remember wig&robe as being like the MN god or something.

Velcrbott - lol!

Sansouci - tell me about it! I haven'y smoked since Jan 04, but I STILL miss it and could start again at the drop of a hat. Like I said before ....I have no willpoweR!!

Me neither & the same goes for the chocolate Easter egg wrappers shoved down to the bottom of the bin!

Velcrobott - ever want to order any from Scotland... then let me know. I could probably get you a good deal.

Wig&robe????

Gotta go. If I stay on past 11, that's me done for and have a big drive tomorrow.

All flippancies aside, it does sound to me as if you are beginning to question the role alcohol plays in your life,toothache.
I think that is a good thing, probably something that everyone who drinks needs to think about periodically.

Good night!! XXX

Bonne route, Moondog!

Thanks Moondog..safe journey!

I'm on holiday from now til next Thursday and I've just realised the wine I'm drinkign is 13.5%!!! No wonder I feel pi$$Ed.

Now I'm pi$$ed... I'm logging off to go talk to DH... much easier this way!

Toothache,

I would ask you the following:-

What's the longest you've ever gone without an alcoholic drink?
Do you need to drink everyday or have alcohol in the house?
Do you cover up the amount you're drinking?
Do you honestly feel your primary relationship in life is with drink?

Have you considered seeking professional help for your drinking (AA or al-anon for instance?), you are certainly drinking to forget your problems and are therefore using drink as an emotional crutch. I cannot say if you're an alcoholic or not but you certainly are going down a slippery slope here and its a long standing problem.

How would you feel if you were told you could never drink alcohol again?. Upset, angry, scared?.

You cannot keep running away from your problems, you will have to face them head on.

I drink when I'm out socialising but, even then not always. I do like a good piss up, though.
I occasionally have a beer with my dinner at home or a whisky in the evening.

When I'm feeling down I always seem to look at the bottle of whisky and then put the kettle on instead. My dad was an alcoholic and, though I'm too young to remember, I always promised myself that I'd never be like that. Easy to say, I suppose.

Toothache,
your relationship with alcohol sounds quite a lot like mine; it's the only drug I think I really could misuse in a big way, and I've certainly gone through phases of boozing far too much. These days I don't, I think - it helps that my current partner, unlike two in my past, is not a low-level alcoholic!

I agree that 'drinking to unwind' is a euphemism for 'using alcohol'. It's a difficult drug to get right, I think, because it's so socially acceptable and so pleasant to do in small amounts.

I think you probably are drinking too much - I bet if you monitor it, you'll be well over the recommended levels. For me, as for quite a few other MNers, a set period off the booze - days when you don't, or a week off or a month off (I'm going to stick with no booze in Jan, I think) is a Very Good Thing. Because quite apart from the hangovers, alcohol is also a depressant. ANd it sounds as if you've got quite a lot going on as it is.

HTH?

I have had to really examine my relationship with alcohol. I think what moondog says makes a lot of sense. I've always loved a drink and used to feel it was a big party, the more the merrier. I kept trying to do this as I got older and had ds but somehow it went a bit bad on me. In fact what I should have done is thought time to grow up but I blamed everything around me instead. My relationship with dp was at rock bottom I couldn't see why or what was going wrong. we nearly split up. Then he told me he hated my drinking, most of the time it was OK sociable type stuff but about every 6 months there would be a real over the top affair completely dreadful and he never knew when the next one was coming. Now in the past I had a dh with a drink problem and I know just how horrid it can be to live with, one of the worst parts being the wondering 'is it tonight' .. So although I don't consider myself in all honesty an alcoholic I had a good think about my relationship with drink. Yes, I 'need' to unwind. Yes I will get to a party and look for the booze. Yes I have used it to bury problems in the past and to be honest it has caused problems too. I decided to do without it for the time being and I can't say I miss it. In fact it's a relief to get rid of it! you don't sound as extreme as me tbh but I would thoroughly recommend a breather from it, if it's getting to be a habit. The higher your level of habitual drinking becomes, the higher you need to go with your binges, too, iyswim.

I drink because I like to, sometimes I can drink 2 bottles a night and then sometimes I have one can of lager and at the minute I have gone about 3 week without drinking at home, going to have a glass or two tonight though.

I now drink b/c I enjoy the taste. Usually have a piss up every couple of months or so, but don't drink daily or even weekly.

Drank very heavily the year my previous marriage broke up and did it ever get me into trouble! With men, that is . . .

Having a toddler about and a hangover is just too bad a mix for me to get carried away.

Could take it or leave it now but tend to have more in summer as I enjoy chilled white wine, beer and champers.

Sobernow,
I completely agree. I have several friends, including both those exes, who completely deny that their drinking might be out of hand, and that worries me.

I do drink on my own, but not in vast quantities - I'm talking a glass or two. And I do try, very hard, not to get drunk any more.

I used to drink pretty much every day and get pissed a lot.
Now I drink maybe two or three times a week, with mates or sometimes with dinner with dh. I never drink on my own. Usually half a bottle of wine or one glass more than that. I do like the taste of wine though, or a nice cold lager in summer (or pimms, or champagne or...........).
I do still sometimes get pissed but like many others I can't do the hangover with kids thing and I don't sleep well if I've had too much. Also I get that stange guilty feeling that getting pissed gives you, even when you've done nothing wrong.
I virtually never drink spirits. A G&T perhaps once a year.

i drink on my own, but i live on my own!(well apart from ds)

i agree with wild, i think drinking can easily turn into a habit which can be difficult to stop.

i only drink at weekends or if out for a nice lunch etc. and i don't really get drunk, tipsey maybe when on a night out, but thats all.

one day everyother weekend - sometimes i get arseholed sometimes i dont at least once a month i go to the pub - then i do try to get at least a little arseholed or i consider it a complete waste of money!! plus i play pool loaaaads better when pissed. so i drink for my own entertainment purposes.

the internet is somuch more fun when your a little pissed there are a quite a few people out there who believe i am an aircraft pilot - i dont know why i picked this pseudonym but it floats my boat, tickles my fancy simply becuase these unknown people i talk to i absolutley know are googling the aircraft type and complany name i give them - i did get caught out once - that too was great. so yes, as i was saying for my own entertainment purposes if it entertains other people along the way - fab. although at mumsnet meetups i get the feeling that i do knock over too many glasses of wine whilst trying to manouver the table to the toilet!