How to deal with being the least liked in the family?

[Naive]

I have siblings and although my parents say they love us all the same, they treat me different to the others. For example, if there's a dispute, it's automatically my fault.

DP has noticed this a lot so it's not me over reacting.

At the moment I'm a little upset as DS was in hospital as a newborn as he was very poorly and I stayed in the hospital with him. It was awful in there, kids screaming and crying and I was a terrified new mum who didn't have a clue how to look after a baby. My family visited briefly and that was it.

My lovely sister's DD was in hospital recently and the family were all at the hospital literally all day long and sometimes staying over to give my sister a break. I would have loved this treatment.

Now don't get me wrong, I love my sister and her DD to bits. But I just wonder why I'm not treated like that.

This is obviously one tiny example in a huge list of things. But it's really upset me.

I think I need to put my relationships with my family into perspective for my own sanity. Please can you all help me do this?

not sure if it's ok to revive a thread this old but I have just come across it and wanted to post, because the "why" question is interesting.
a few years ago at xmas when i had had a few i asked my dad why he / they didn't like me when I was little. I think we had just been looking at old photos and i didn't look like the hideous monster i remembered being. i thought i was quite cute looking and it didn't seem so obvious any more why i was so difficult, problematic, etc. my dad was so confused he asked me to repeat the question and looked really shocked. he said, "but we didn't not like you. why did you think that?" i couldn't answer because i thought it was just obvious. anyway i am still confused about why i thought this and they thought that etc etc. i don't think in my case - as it may be for many others who have far worse to deal with - it is simply that they are toxic and nasty and i can ignore what they think and say. i am interested in what they think and say because i think we all got things wrong and i am as likely to have got lots of stuff wrong as they have. but i don't know how to talk about it or fix it, i really need to talk to someone this morning i am dreading xmas and feeling so overwhelmed and tearful.
btw the thing about the finals and the champagne is one of the saddest things i have ever heard.

my mum is like your mum too,she will only do stuff for us 4 girls if she really has to,like shes being forced.she is like it with all of us not in that respect she isnt favouring one over the other. shes not interested in mine or my sisters kids its very upsetting but it cant be forced the bond is either there or it isnt.
im mostly upset and angry at the total lack of love and support through my hardest time when i had severe pdn.
i told her after 5 yrs why i was always off with her and she was shocked she really didnt realise how ill i had been. i dont beleive this as my dh would call for her help and none came.
ive came to realise that she cannot and never will be a support figure for me and so have decided to go it alone and to never ask for her help.

ssanta - do you think she might have suffered pnd herself but never admitted it?

oh yes she did say that she probably did have it after my youngest sister was born she did the basic's for her but didnt love her at all until she was about nine months old .she really wanted a boy but we were all girls that might have had something to do with it.
her mum my nan is evil she hated my mum from when she was small and treated her badly compared to her 3 brothers she was intensely jealous of my mums relationship with my grandad. its no wonder she is the way she is !!

Well yes and absolutely nothing you or your siblings could have done to change this. Ditto for the OP.