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[whethergirl]

I'm in a bit of a pickle. Will try to describe without too much detail...
I've been a single mum for 4 years. Recently, for the first time in years, I've fallen for a guy who I'm in regular contact with. When he realised this was the case, he made clear his situation, which is, he is heartbroken and still pining after another. I was gutted. However, he did say that he could offer nothing more than something very casual (a fling basically!). Really don't know if I want to go for this option or not. I could really do with the physical intimacy. I've had a week of this situation unfolding, I've been like a love sick teenager and to make matters worse, I've had terrible insomnia and feeling completely over excited, which I'm now realising is probably the herbal slimming pills I'm taking. My heads a mess. Anyone want to shoot me?

this guy, who is in showbiz and you emailed to say you like his work...

Is it Russell Brand?

No Loves, not quite!!! Although Russell Brand has offered to fix my toilet flush on several occassions and I have had to decline, for the main reason that if he was to examine my toilet parts nothing would work the same again!

You probably won't have heard of him although he is due to present a channel four documentary quite soon! I'm not saying any more!!!

Thanks Broken, that's a really good thing to remember - "A good friendship is a good start and a better than a casual relationship." We had a lovely time today actually while he fixed my broken tap AND my toilet flush. Not as much serious flirting as last time, although lots of jokey innuendo's (you'd be surprised how many come up during a discussion about toilet cisterns). He opened up to me about his past relationship and how he wants to move on but is finding it really difficult and painful. It was nice because he's starting to trust me. Our friendship did really seem to blossom and that did seem more important. He met my son for the first time too. It was all really good and I feel much better for it.

Hmmm lol 'for the main reason that if he was to examine my toilet parts nothing would work the same again!'

Is this code for lady parts as I imagine any lady parts closely examined and fixed by Brand would never be the same again

I would deffo keep it just friends with this man. He may, in time fall for you. He will probably NOT however fall for you if you casually sleep with him.

HMMM whats this documentary, is he totally fit?

I am going to be the lone voice of dissention here. If you can convince yourself to not expect a relationship, I think a few dates, some fun, some sex will do wonders for your self-esteem and eventually the ability to meet someone who does want a commitment. I am in a sexless marriage and currently seeing someone that I know just for sex. We both know it will never lead anywhere but it's fun and makes me feel amazing. After being rejected for years it's just what I need. I think sometimes the sensible option is not necessarily the right one.

Yes Loves, I did mean lady parts! Sorry, innuendo's are as normal as breathing for me. My whole life is a carry on film. And stop digging!!! I couldn't possibly say who he is. My big mouth lands me enough trouble and feel I've already given away enough details! Yes, he is fit...for someone his age anyway! My cousin met him and text me (while he was still there!) "Cor, he's like a fit dad, woof woof!"
My friends are telling me the same thing, that in time he may fall for me but obviously I'm not going to rely on that. Better to stay friends for a long time than to fuck it up by sleeping with him and getting all emotional.

Fizzfiend....you're the other little voice in my head! Stop confusing me! Well, if he does make advances and I can't resist then your theory will at least serve as a back up.

Hi was wondering how you got on, really well by the sound of it, well done you and fingers crossed for the future.I hope everything works out as you hope, you deserve some happiness.
Take care of yourself and your son.

So do you Brokenheart, thanks for checking. Your advice really helped. It's difficult, but we are stronger than we think.
I really hope things work out well for you too, you never know what's round the corner and you too deserve happiness xx

I agree with fizzfiend in that WHILE its happening, you would feel grat, texting,fun, excitement etc.

However, AFTER its happened, and he has moved on, you will feel like crap. And chances are you wont have him as even a friend by that stage.

You're right Loves, it would be difficult to stay friends with someone who has broken your heart and I do really want to stay friends with him.