Quick question - if you found these texts, what would you think?

[SorryNeedANameChange]

I was playing on DP's mobile phone game and it suddenly went off when I pressed a wrong button. I had to fiddle with it to find the game again and came across his texts. Curiosity got the better of me and I looked through a few of them (thats genuinly how it happened) and here is what I found.

"Sorry, had to go, he was waking up. spk to u soon xxx"

"I just needed someone to talk to x"

"Its a shame you're at work, we could have met up for a drink x"

"are you back yet babe? xx"

All from the same number. No name attached to it.

So what would you think? please be honest.

muckypups-dont you be sorry!how awful for you to be in situation

sorryneedanamechange how you doing?Feeling?
flightaatendtent made a good point about sounding like someone relying on him emotionally. This is how people get close, if your Dh is anything like mine they are generally nice guys and willing to help people. This sometimes gets miscontrude as something more though from the other person.

My dh's ow was having emotional troubles and started confiding in my dh, he did the same to her as un be known to me he wasnt happy at home. They had an emotional affair for a good 6 months and if i hadnt have found out it would have been sexual too. They had the 'what if' conversation and even though i know he has minimum contact with her now it still hurts so much when i think of them together(thats prob why im always on the relationship threads as im finding it hard to get over).

Anyway what im trying to say is that you can nip this in the bud too, if there is any thing to nip. Which i truley hope there isnt.

Flamesparrow, you got an e mail, how funny, sorry but it is

If you are married I would forward them to yourself so you have a copy as evidence of infidelity.

But Kat has a good point - it may be an innocent mistake. Double check before you confront him and choose your moment wisely.

Just ask him...Id be worried tho

It sounds suspicious to me

If it were me I wouldn't think twice about questioning him about the texts. I know some people might see reading texts as an invasion of privacy but I think what the texts might imply far outweighs the right for him to be annyoed about you reading them in the first place. I have always been very open about my phone, emails etc as has DP and I know everyone is different but if they are innocent I imagine his main concern will be to reassure you.

Hope it turns out to be nothing. Platonic friendships between friends can often seem more cosy than they are but your peace of mind is the priority here. xx

I found messages on my husband's phone just like this in December. He was v loving and reassuring over Christmas, said all stopped and was some girl at the gym who came on to him, nothing happened, just texts. We had loads of sex, which kept up for months. He starting acting a bit distant in January, slightly different, I couldn't really explain how. Was v defensive about his mobile. Over next few months still the same, something wrong but he told me I was mad and needed help to control my irrational paranoia. I started to feel he was right, and as tho I ought to get a grip on myself. He is really stressed at work and we are in debt for God's sake, leave the guy alone.

Guess what - found out in May that they were having a full-blown affair (she is married too) from Christmas through to when I found out. Seems as tho my life has fallen apart. Now he says he loves me but isn't in love with me, thinks it's all over. A complete bolt from the blue. I've been analysing our relationship and come to the conclusion that in the past there has been no communication, which very slowly broke down the close bond we had for years. I left him to it, he left me to it, in order to keep things ticking along rather than rock the boat. If we could have spoken last year and sorted out the little problems that were there (like there are in ALL relationships) we could have prevented this. He needed some freedom from our problems, but didn't think for a sec that I did too, and we could have escaped together. We are trying, wish us luck!

Advice - do not make him feel angry or pressurised. Be completely calm, prepare for the worst and confront him with what you've found. Don't break down or be needy, that'll drive him away. Be strong. Keep us posted, we are here for you!!!

Spell check ditto your story. My Dh said he loved me but not in love with me and had an emotional affair. We too are working through it and after 8 weeks he declared his love for me again. I completley had to re look at how i was with him though and i have to take some of the blame. I still get really paranoid about the ow as he works with her and i have lost some of the respect for my dh, hes not the perfect man i thought he was. I question each day wether i want to put myself through this, and i feel the need to talk about it all the time rather than bottle it up, its been soul destroying but also a big wake up call for us both, but we love each other and we have great kids and a great life so worth the effort.

i really feel for this poster, its an awfull position to be in. I do hope she posts again soon with good news.

Good Luck. I hope it works out well for you too. If you need to talk you can e mail me. I know what your going through xx

Thanks Muckypups, just trying to find a way through this so we can both be happy. I'd like to renegotiate our relationship and see if it comes back but we will see! I'll keep you up to date.