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Original poster

friend still seething over photo album her difficult inl's compiled for her

65 replies

bigboydiditandranaway · 31/07/2008 12:19

My friend received a photo album last year as a birthday gift from her inl's. It was made at asda i think, the thing is, it has loads of photos of friends inl's even ones that are A4 size, really OTT, with them holding her dd.

My friend finds her inls overbearing, controlling and very difficult, her dh also agrees with this.

Now she has wanted to throw the album in the bin for some time now but hasn't, but she recently had a look for it and found it hidden away in her dh's wardrobe and has asked me what i think she should do, what do you think.

OP posts:
theexmrsfederer · 31/07/2008 17:41

what a storm in a teacup

pathetic really, when you think of some of the really horrible things happening all around us

she should get a grip

QuintessentialShadows · 31/07/2008 17:44

She should leave the album intact.

Is it getting to her that she herself never took so many pictures and made an album?

She should not touch the album her inlaws made, but make her own album.

TheProvincialLady · 31/07/2008 17:45

I agree that she is a bit daft to get so worked up about something that has been in the back of her wardrobe for ages and largely forgotten, but it was a present to HER not her daughter and if she doesn't want to keep it she should throw it away/burn it/dance on it and say evil chants. Her choice. I probably wouldn't keep it TBH but then I am fairly ruthless about not keeping things I don't like. What is the point of cluttering up the house with them?

Blandmum · 31/07/2008 17:45

Jeez, life is too bloody short to waste emotional energy over daft things like this!

Sounds like these people all have too much time on their hands.

But the book in the back of the wardrobe and get on with life.

If this is all they have to worry about they should count their blessings

MadamePlatypus · 31/07/2008 17:47

Wouldn't there be loads of photos of the inl's because those would have been photos that they would have taken and had access to? Maybe they just wanted to add to her collection of photos of her child. If she doesn't like it she should leave it at the bottom of the wardrobe.

QuintessentialShadows · 31/07/2008 17:49

MB, arent you scientifically trained?

There is a thread about an 18month old who may have swallowed floor cleaner. I gave some advice based on my limited knowledge of ph, but think somebody like you could possibly go refute me if I was wrong??

reethi96 · 31/07/2008 17:51

Does she really need advice on this? Can't she just stick it on the shelf and forget about it?

QuintessentialShadows · 31/07/2008 17:51

if you were to have a moment MB here

Blandmum · 31/07/2008 17:52

Not an expert so I'd take the wee lad to A and E

TakeMeHome · 31/07/2008 17:56

{{{{hmm - quite fancy some coasters in orange gingham actually}}}}}

2rebecca · 31/07/2008 18:14

What a petty thing to seeth over. OK it wasn't a very thoughtful present but if that's the worse present she's ever received she's doing OK. I think throwing away pictures of your daughter is very churlish, especially if she values her relationship with her husband. How would she feel if her husband chucked out photos of her mum and the sprog?
If this photo album causes her this much grief I wonder if the MIL is the only overbearing controlling one. Tell her to chill out a bit.
When her MIL is dead her daughter may value photos of her and granny.

wheresthehamster · 31/07/2008 18:24

Having just spent a few weeks putting together a photobook it's hard work!

They must have thought it would make a nice present, perhaps some shots they didn't have themselves. The thing about the A4 shots - I had a couple of pages left to fill in my own book and enlarged a couple at random.

Anyway - a miniscule thing to even be thinking about months later.

TwoBigNorks · 31/07/2008 20:18

My MIL gave me anti ageing cream, I'm only 35 (I hope her eyesight is bad and its not me)! I would much rather have had a photo book even if I and DH were not in it.

TheFallenMadonna · 31/07/2008 20:21

My MIL gave me a microwave omelette maker - I'd have rather had the anti-aging cream...

wheresthehamster · 31/07/2008 20:23

Dp's dad gave me a man's wash bag because 'you work in a man's job'
I was a computer programmer

Would have preferred the omelette maker...

TheFallenMadonna · 31/07/2008 20:24
Grin
GooseyLoosey · 31/07/2008 20:28

Bear this. My step-granny gave me a 6 month out of date plastic box of chessey nibbles from Woolies that had a price tag on and had been marked down to 20p (clearly because they were reaching their sell by date).

TwoBigNorks · 31/07/2008 20:29

ewwwwwwww

Blandmum · 31/07/2008 20:30

My aunty Jean gave me a toy telephone, when I was 10. A fisher price one

Blandmum · 31/07/2008 20:31

My aunty Jean gave me a toy telephone, when I was 10. A fisher price one

thisisyesterday · 31/07/2008 20:31

If I made an album of my children it would probably have a lot of pictures of myself and dp with them.
because that's the kind of pictures I have on my camera. on accouint of, its MY camera

see what I am saying?
the IL's made this present, of pictuers of her daughter for her.
yes, they happen to have them in it. because they're THEIR pictures, of course they will feature in them.

I think it's a thoughtful present

Original poster
bigboydiditandranaway · 01/08/2008 10:39

As a few of you have said, it was a dig. My friends inl's are renowned for being difficult and pushy and always make vile comments to her and because of this my friend keeps her distance from them, to be fair so does her dh.

So many of you have said just forget about it and leave it where it is. I think she would do this for her dh, but because the gift was given as a dig on her birthday and she feels bitter about it(apparantly her mum wasn't too impressed with it either)

I think she has felt a bit on edge as she has just had her birthday and was dreading their present. (this time the presents were normal!)Her mil has said she will buy her a top after she has had her baby, don't know why she couldn't just giver her the money in the card and leave it at that, but still i suppose she means well or is it another ploy at a dig that she won't go shopping with her?

OP posts:
2rebecca · 01/08/2008 11:56

Have never gone shopping with my mil, didn't go with my own mother once I passed 18.
Some people don't like giving money as a present.
Being thick skinned and ignoring the nonsense sounds best here, and giving mil a wide bearth which she's doing.

MadamePlatypus · 02/08/2008 07:11

"I think she has felt a bit on edge as she has just had her birthday and was dreading their present"

At least your friend is pregnant - she is allowed to be irrational and emotional. If she weren't pregnant, I would really advise her to get out more/read a newspaper.

Paddlechick666 · 02/08/2008 09:28

my MIL gave me a lavender bag for Xmas

anyways, firstly I would keep the album and give it to dd when she's older.

secondly, i can see it's a crap present and might have been done purely to wind up the OP but life is really too short to get upset about it.

obviously there's other issues with these ILs being overbearing etc and this might be the catalyst but, if you'll excuse the pun, the bigger picture should be addressed. Not the destruction of something that the op's dd might love when she is older.

i am a cheapskate and regularly compile these things as Xmas gifts for family but I tend to keep the content to pics of dd!

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