online dating - is this normal??

[susia]

I have been chatting to a man on a dating website and spoke on the phone on Monday. He said he'd call next week to arrange a date.

Anyway, this evening I got a text saying something like ...'this is my email address...see you tomorrow', I texted back saying 'I don't think this was meant for me?' expecting him to pretend it was even if it wasn't or something similar but he texted back 'no sorry that wasn't meant for you, I'll call you next week!'

I feel a bit put out or am I being oversensitive?

dating sites can attract a lot of attention, if he is fit that is, so it's highly likely he has more than you 'on the go', however, once you have met, and you spark he'll probably cut his ties with the other ladies.

Give him a chance, if he turns out to be an online cheater - swear off men as they are all cocks and become a lesbian.

"Plate-spinning" - that is EXACTLY what he is doing, excellent phrase. I know this is very common on dating sites but to me it seems shallow and soulless - which is why I'm not a big fan of internet dating. OP, maybe the medium just isn't the right way for you to meet a guy?
The 'mass mailing' approach never really endeared people to me, to be honest. I got so I was able to pick out the kind of chap we are discussing here, who probably sends the same friendly email to 50 women to see if they get any responses. They may well meet someone they like, but it's all in the attitude. I just find that attitude a bit... too modern for my liking. Guess I'm too traditional ;)

My dating site philosophy would be, take the time to get to know someone properly and really connect with them as a person, then once there is an established mutual like, meet asap. If there's no resulting spark, you can put it down to experience, and you may well have made a new platonic friend at the very least. People who use the scatter gun approach to relationships seem to end up alone, in my experience. Because they reek of this desperate, 'must get a date lined up' mentality that is sooooo off-putting.

Just my opinion though, I know there will be others who do not agree

Don't leave it long before you meet up, the longer you talk online, the more you're going to fall for an online persona and not actually him, it's easy to say all the right things to you when he insn't sat across from you. I say meet up soon as and take it slowly, as a normal date would progress

the internet dating site is just the means to make contacts

and you get a bit more info about peoples interests than if you just fancy someone in a bar

you can exchange emails and get an idea what they are like but meeting is the key i think

or even in my experience the point when you start to try and arrange a meeting

i had several guys who did want to meet but the whole way it went when we started the actual arrange a date bit showed some of them up

i shall internet date again because i know now that it is a good way to meet people but im also doing stuff in rl like holidays and sports and stuff to meet people normally too ready for when i may be available again

if you are an intersting person who does lots of stuff then it makes you a better potential date than someone who is just interested in dating iyswim

my new p was frompof, i messaged him and we were intially just friends, but it grew from there

am tapping this out from his pc while he is snoozing

Just spotted this thread.

I met a very nice man on POF, we are still seeing each other nearly 6 months on and things are going well.

However, I had to wade through a lot of frogs before I met him.

In answer to OP, this sort of stuff is fairly normal in the online dating community. I think you do need to have a fairly thick skin!

It can be fun, but if you are feeling very sensitive or vulnerable then it's best to leave it for a bit.

Infact, Zippi talks a lot of sense.

i met my bf on pof too and we have been seeing each other for aboiut 7 months or so actually or so from when we first met in october but we started pretty slowly before we turned into something more

What's POF?

plenty of fish

PentyofFish.com

It's free...and I think it's a good site but then I'm probably biased. There are a lot of sites around so plenty of choice