you don't automatically haveto go to a shelter - the wise thng to do would be to go to th council and find out what yor options are - they arent't going to tell any one - and you can alays decline and go back home.
they may offer you a B&B. and then you are straiht to the top of the list for housing.
meanwhile you should call the police.
he can say whatever he wants - men can be very manipulaing - especially when you love them.
even if you don't prosecute - they wil have it on record.
you re in the best position you could be - believe it or not - you can get out quick. you do not have o say -te only person keeping ou ther is you,
you might thin your daughter doesn't know whatsgoing on - but she knows enough to tell thekarate instructor doesn't she
what are you teaching her?
think about that if you won't thin about your own safety, think aboutyor daughter having o list to that
think about your daughter being asked to lie - FOR YOU
two people at the karate place are already concerned and i doubt that they are the only ones. supposing ne of them gets so concerned thy phone social services?
eh?
ou have to put your emotional self in a box and push it to one side for one hour.
in that hour youhave t phone
shelter ere
they have a legal team that can give you real advice on our housing situation
what i know is this
if you are the tenant - you can have him removed anyway
if you are joint tenants or he is the tenant you should seek advice - but i know with council property that they can evict him for breach of his tenancy and re-house you back inyour home.
shelter deal with issues regrding private landlord too.
what you need to do is admit this to agencies that can help you, they are not gong to believe this man, they are not stupid. the can tell a liar. its not like they won't have come across this story many times before unfortunatly.
you need to think straight. practically. report it now. stay where you are. when it happend again the i a record.
report it now - you get back together in 6 months - he does i gain - you have it on file.
get your documents together passports, birth cetificates, bank statements and bills in your name such as loans etc. then if you decide one day that enough is enough, you have the account numbers to sort things out with thehlp of the CAB.
leaving things is only making it worse.
your bruises will fade - he will be sorry. and you will be scared. on eggshelss - and one day you will find yoursef devoid of a support system - he will have taken it all - you will find yourself relying on him, no karate, no friends etc. thats what they do.
if you leave. what will happen
your home situatin may be in a state of flux for the short term.
you will get advice from agencies such as the housing, thecab and other support agencies.
good friends and relatives will gather round you and be your suppot system
you will have self respect and pride in yourself for having achieved something thatmoney cannotbuy
DIGNITY.
you will teach yourdaughter that it doesn't matter who it is - they can't do things like that - even daddy isn't allowed to she will learn that you area srong woman with dgnity and respect and she will love you for that.
she wont have to listen to rows and pretend sehasn't
she won't be frightened in case mummygets hut again.
she won't have to hate you for putting up with it an making her go through it.
You wil go back to katate. they wil be pleased to see you. they will have the utmost respect fr you and what you have achieved.
so if you do this now - you will have a home sometime soon. friends, family, karate resect dignity
if you stay you have?...
well not a lot really.
listen, i work in housing although iam not a housing officer i kinda have a bit more jist of the processes - so if you want any help give me a mail on
creamy custardo at hotmail dot com