Would you accept this money?

[money26]

I live alone and am sort of seeing a guy (it’s complicated) for a while, we’ve known each other a long time
he earns more than me and is living with his parent while he saves to buy a house (I already own)
his parent won’t allow visitors so he always comes to mine on average twice a week. He’s said as I cook, he uses my hot water for showers, drinks out the fridge, snacks, food etc he feels like he should pay something towards things and has offered £100pm

I cook usually as I enjoy it but if we get a takeaway he pays and will bring sweets/chocolate for me

I feel £100pm is too much, he says he doesn’t want to be a drain on me

He wouldn’t even dare try. I’m fiercely independent and have always said nobody will ever have a share in the place I live. I don’t tolerate much at all
My dad once walked off when I was being shouted at by an aggressive man over parking as “you were dealing with it fine and I wasn’t getting arrested with you”

He actually prefers the cheaper stuff
it’s decent meals but I’m used to budget shopping. I’ll make bread, cakes, pasta, pastry etc from scratch
lasagne with fresh pasta is probably as fancy as I go

😁 That sounds very cool x

I’d take it, put it into a separate account and maybe treat you both to a weekend away.

I meant the OP not your lasagne, no offence x

I think it's great. £100pm shows that's he appreciates there is an additional cost with him being there but it's isn't over the top either.

He could be a keeper.
😋

What a good guy! So many just take the absolute mick!

He sounds thoughtful and a keeper. Allow him to contribute if he wants to.

He’s not perfect but neither am I. This was when I had to take time off for an operation and was panicking

I probably wouldn't accept the money, but I think it's a lovely gesture for him to offer.

You are forgetting, OP, that he is living in a situation where he can't host you for his benefit. It's a sensible thing to be doing, saving money for his own place, but it means you are providing what he can't because he's "cheap skating" on his own living situation. Giving you a bit of cash, even if it's a little more than the amount you are out of pocket (which it may not be, really) is just a little appreciation for all the effort and money you've put into a place that he gets to enjoy.

I think TwitchyNibbles has the right idea. Accept the offer with grace and spend any extra on making the meals you share even nicer with a bottle of wine or something.