Men please... are there men out there who don't follow endless women on social media?

[AcrosstheBorder]

Just that really......

Any out there in today's crazy world that respect the woman they are with and want to please her and have real intimacy rather than the endless, mindless addition of one woman after another for masturbation?

Starting to think I will remain single. So many women seem to just accept this... accept no sex.. accept no true intimacy.

The only time I have caught my DP looking lasciviously at his phone I asked him what he was watching. It was a reel about cheese.

with respect, this sounds a little self-pitying?

of course there are men that are not like this.

a large proportion of men too i'd guess (if not the majority).

there are a large amount of men who are really only interested in their own self-gratification. on occasion they might relax this position a little in terms of being open to a relationship, but this preference is likely to remain to an extent.

if you're with someone like this, i think you should just cut your losses.

if they don't care enough to curb these preferences while in a relationship, they're probably not good relationship material for a whole host of other reasons.

My DH doesn’t. He hasn’t got any SM accounts and neither do I. We both used to but even in its heyday but neither of us used it to follow people aside form actual family and friends IRL and I saw his profile all the time. Never had an inkling he was doing anything wrong and me neither. I can see why it is appealing to find a partner who is not following women and I hope you can find someone who has some similar outlook to yourself, OP. They are out there.

Edited for typos

My late husband was the same, he had a burner phone but he wasn't a drug dealer or terrorist 😁

My DH is to be found staring at DIY and car repair clips of which he loves both.

You can have more than one Insta profile. So, although a bloke might in public be following tractors or fly fishing he could be slavering over young girls on his other profile you don’t know about and which he doesn’t allow followers. Only know this because it was mentioned on Amandaland (teenager had two accounts, mum was only privy to one.)

Car videos, politics and retirement planning here. 🤣

My DH doesn’t have any SM he loves abit of Reddit and YouTube but he couldn’t care less about social media crap thank goodness.

I don’t know any men in my circle who follow random women on social media. Weird

Love when the not my Nigel’s come out!

Op there is no need to follow anyone there is enough content in every place to see whatever you want.

I would think not being in a relationship with someone who does is more about them being fuck stupid than it is about them goggling the women that they follow.

True, he pretty much has almost zero emotional intelligence. And is sort of stupid about techy stuff, although still manages to find all these women, sometimes from other sites, and googles or links in to their own pages.

It's at a fairly obsessive level, and as per my other post, no sex. He has sex with the internet and his hand and won't change so I've ended it. I understand masturbation, no issue with that, not really much of an issue with occasional porn use. The issue is when the online content completely takes over and death grip sets in. He prefers wanking, I would like a passionate relationship and would prefer a man who prefers real life and a woman with a high sex drive!

beyond family/friends and local community groups, it's just cars and bikes!

@AcrosstheBorder

What you have written is desperately sad and a terrible reflection of some Men out there. There is a chance I am a bit older, I have two boys and I am trying to educate them to not end up like this although thats not easy, but they are preteen and I have started now.

It is no suprise you have ended it, his use of technology is kin to the Nigel that can keep his eyes offf the young women sunbathing next to his wife. I do not profess to be a saint either, of course I notice and atractive women (younger and older) when I see one but beeing blatant is just imature and basically rude. (I would also expect my DW too also notice hot men keeps us all on our toes)

Following random influencers who’s contect is specifically for the male gaze is ok when you're single but in a relationship is is unnesseary and preferring wanking to a real woman is mind blowing but I am fully aware that this is the case.

Men need something that isn’t the Manosphere I have been panned on MN before for suggesting that the FHM of old needs to come back. In the days I read it there was no nipples and there was a lot of good advice about fashion, music health and dare I say women and sex. I bought my first sex toy to use with a new partner at 19 from reading about it in FHM. I am sure there are married women on this thread whose husbands have never brought one into the bedroom, yet it was advocating it all those years ago to close the orgasm gap.

There were issues with some of the later content and other mags but I fear what has replaced it is more toxic and is creating chaps like the one you have encountered.x

Thank you for your response.

He has actually been married twice before as well. Now I understand why such a "seemingly" nice man was single!

Honestly my brother and father do not have any SM account
None of the guys I know follow anyone - most use it for quick messages to mates or family and that's it

None of my adult sons follow women on SM. 2 of 3 of them don’t even use SM.

I only have a Insta account and dont accept these requests or follow random women. Whats the point, pretty dull and habe better things to do. 😊

What do you define as "random women"?

I'm on Mumsnet (6 years)
YouTube for Northern soul records (45 year obsession)
BBC hys.
That's it.

Man here. Don't ' follow women ' on social media '. Have a few FB friends who are women..... because they're my friends. Do people really follow strangers ?

Sorry I’m not a man - but My partner has insta and facebook and doesn’t do this. He rarely looks at them/ uses them though. I’m not saying he never looks at women on the internet, I’m sure he does sometimes - but not on fb and insta !

It is a terribly unattractive trait op, I agree. My husband doesn’t, as many others on here, if that helps ‘prove’ they dont all do it. It’s just endless tractors, fields, cows and rugby!

It does seem that many men do act this way though, following endless women purely for perving purposes, and it’s disheartening. That being said, and this is something I know I’ve talked to friends etc about before, why are they so stupid as to actually follow all these women and to actually press ‘like’ or whatever on their photos, can’t they be a bit more discreet?! I don’t think anyone expects men (or women!) to just never notice attractive people again but being ao blatant about it is icky.

OP look at it from another angle - if you start seeing someone and look at their socials you can immediately dump those who need the IG models to follow them. It is a red flag but a very obvious one to help you rule out the idiots.

Yes, sadly a lot of men have half naked women in bikinis in their "friends" list with names like AnastaziaXXX or whatever; soft porn IG models, probably all AI. It really does show a deep lack of critical thinking and what they think women should be like. As I say though, easy to weed out without dedicating years of your life to.

Interesting thread. I too find it very icky. I'd like to ask all those that have commented, if your other half doesn't do this, what would you think if he'd done this type of thing before you?