Marriage in middle age - why?

[Thatsnotallgood]

If you remarried in your 50s and 60s can I ask why?

inspired by may recent threads talking about marriages that happen at a life stage when there is no likelihood of children together. In particular questions around inheritance etc.

I ask because I’ve been with my DP for 12 years and we still live apart and keep our finances completely separate. When we first met I assumed that I might want us to marry at some point but the more time goes on, the less inclined I feel.

i could imagine living together with all the legalities nailed down. Am I missing something about the reason for marrying in middle age?

I’m a little thrown by this thread - though I suppose this is the kind of reaction I was expecting from some of my friends when dp and I got engaged at ages 59 and 56. In fact, at least to our faces, there was universal pleasure that we’ve both met someone we love so much and want to throw a party to celebrate it. We’re even aiming to marry in our parish church. The finances are all dealt with (yes you can write wills that protect your respective children’s interests) and it’s just joy after that. Really looking forward to it.

Or perhaps I’m just a needy old slag.

I married at the age of 25, with no children likely.

By your logic, OP, I shouldn’t have bothered getting married.

(20 years later and we’re still very happy we did!).

Not at all, my marriage took place when I was in my mid 20s and there’s never a guarantee of children.

It’s very different getting married relatively young when you are both starting out, to getting married in your 50s when your situations may differ in terms of children, pensions, assets etc.

Family asked Why when my uncle decided to marry his partner in his 60s.

Two year later, he got cancer. The following 18 months were made a lot easier for his lively wife by the fact she was legally family rather than "just a girlfriend"... with doctors, time of work, just society really. She will forever be family, still comes to famiky events, buys Christmas presents for the various gamily children etc.
Hopefully this would have been the case without the legal side... but she says it felt less complicated.
Its sad they barely got three years of marriage.

Thank you so much! 🤗

I got married three years ago in my 50s to the love of my life. We'd been together 12 years at that point. Second marriage for him but not me. We got married for love and we wanted to celebrate with everyone we knew. It was absolutely magical.

Three other couples, in their 50s, also got married that same year within our circle. Less than half of those individuals have been married before. One couple in an intimate civil service with elderly parents, another in the Australian bush and another couple with their adult son in Sri Lanka. Not everybody who gets married later in life is on a second marriage or doing it just to ease life admin.

More cynical in middle age. Can’t imagine marrying again. I’m relatively financially secure so would want to protect that for me and my children

Actually, I don’t even want to live with a man! But perhaps I haven’t found the right one

DH and I married in our 40s, second time for both. He’s the love of my life and I wanted to make that public commitment to him, and luckily he felt the same! No practicalities mattered to us whatsoever. It was all just about love. We’ve been completed by it and I’m still head over heels. Best thing I’ve ever done 🥰