Can men and women love eachother unconditionally? Honest opinion

[HoneyB2025]

I know you can care for someone genuinely and be there for them, support them, but when something bad happens or if they disappoint you it is possible for your feelings to change, hence why relationships break.

But I feel loving your child is unconditional because you brought them into this world, they are apart of you, no matter what they do you will always love them regardless, without expecting anything in return.

No, not in this state of time. later on, perhaps.

Nope. There’s always a line. At least for most well adjusted, mentally and emotionally healthy adults.

Yes, to an extent. I would say the only real unconditional love is for a child (you would leave a partner, friend or sibling if they continually abused you, no?).
Yet most of us would never abandon our child, no matter what they did. Some people say if they did something awful, they would, but most parents wouldn't.

No I think there are conditions on romantic love and should be.

I've certainly never felt unconditional love for anyone except my children.

No

Of course it is conditional - I wouldn't stay with my DH if he was unfaithful, or violent, or a drug user, or any number of other things which would be unacceptable to me. We have been together for over 30 years and I plan to spend the rest of my life with him, but my love for him will always be conditional in a way that my love for our dc isn't.

Im a rarity in that I would still look after my ex husband if he was end of life. Im not sure that's unconditional. I still like him and our daughter still thinks he's her favourite parent. I would do it for her.

Unconditional love is for children and, arguably, pets. They are not fully responsible for their actions. They need their adults to love them and forgive them.

Unconditional love for a fellow adult is dysfunctional.

No. Self-love is also important.

At a certain point, if your partner hurts you or lets you down, it chips away at the love you have for them or breaks it.

And that's actually healthy. We aren't dogs to endlessly fawn over the boot that kicks us.

Sometimes a person doesn't deserve your love.

Love in a romantic sense should never be unconditional. Life isn’t a romance novel and what actually happens is one parter (usually the woman) totally centres her life around a male parter who gives absolutely nothing back.

I have no idea whether men and women 'can' or 'can't' love each other unconditionally, but I am here to say no-one should be loving anyone unconditionally. That would make monsters of us all. It's the fear of being judged or rejected by the people we love that keeps us all decent.

The possible exception where unconditional love is acceptable (and indeed encouraged) is loving your own young child who hasn't yet learnt how to be a fully rounded, kind, civilised, non-narcissistic human being. Hopefully they will get there in time, but if, at some point, you reluctantly reach the conclusion that in spite of all your efforts not to, you've bred an absolute horror of a human, then it's perfectly okay to attach conditions to loving them as well. We should all have our limits of just what level of awfulness or abuse or depravity we will tolerate from others, surely? Even when it's our own grown up children.

Come on. Think about it. The whole concept of unconditional love is for fools. And Instagram wankers.

Only a sap with low self-esteem would love someone who wasn’t their child “unconditionally”.

I don’t think anyone thinks that romantic partners love each other unconditionally. Even when people say “I’ll always love him/her” they mean within the realms of reasonably predictable behaviour, maybe they mean they’d love them even if they cheated, but they don’t mean if they turned out to be a serial child killer.

There should be and obviously are conditions on romantic love. The only love that should be unconditional is a parents for their child but that’s certainly not universal. I’d throw myself under a bus for my kids but if one of them murdered the other I can’t say I’d still love the murdering one.

I don’t believe romantic love is unconditional. There is always a line. I will, however, always love my children, no matter what.

I still love and care about my ex husband but it’s not unconditional. There are things he could do that would end that.

Summed up my view.

I think you can love the person you see them as/you think they are unconditionally, but if they show you that they aren’t actually that person then the live doesn’t transfer to their true self.

There is a difference between loving someone unconditionally and staying in their lives.

I find that my love seems to be unconditional and I still love a lot of people who I don’t see anymore . Even an abusive ex - I left and would never have him in my life ever again but when I think of him I feel love for him. My brain just intervenes and says no way he’s dangerous stay away. So I do. My heart is a totally different beast.

i am amazed and jealous of people who’s heads and hearts align and they stop loving people who treat them badly. But also think some people stop loving to easily , for minor slights/ hurts etc

I am here to say no-one should be loving anyoneunconditionally. That would make monsters of us all. It's the fear of being judged or rejected by the people we love that keeps us all decent.
really? You’re only a good person so other people don’t judge you?

As in romantic love, no. There'll always be something that'll be the last straw.

I think the sociocultural myths about romance, true love, and happy ever after serve a purpose, but in reality romantic love doesn’t hold a candle to the mother-child bond.

I was absolutely floored by the depth of connection with my dc. I love dh deeply, and dearly, but not unconditionally.

Tbf we wouldn’t have needed the legal, moral, social and religious weight of marriage constraints and taboos if love between men and women was as strong as it’s supposed to be.

I think only children and pets get loved unconditionally, everyone else has to earn it.

No, just the love for your own child is unconditional in my opinion .

Of course not - it’s always subject to behaviour. Children you love unconditionally.