Orgasms - anyone ever faked one?

[lovenotwar149]

This has probably been asked before. I'm very curious to know, if people are willing to share this info that is.

Realistically, you wouldn't though would you. If he said that to you, you would take the hump and never go down on him again.

I agree. I find the whole concept of faking in order to "get it over with" even stranger than doing it for the guy's ego. If you don't like something, it's OK to withdraw consent.
I mean, sure, this wasn't really a thing when I first started having sex and there was pretty much still a myth that you should never stop once started as the guy wouldn't be able to "cope" with it. Which is utter bollocks, of course, but that's what made me a lot less vocal in my twenties.
But nowadays, there is literally no excuse. Unless you think you are in an unsafe situation where vocalising that you want to stop will put you at a greater risk than carrying on. Which, sadly, still does happen I imagine.

Thats an interesting answer indeed! Well I would want a conversation about it for sure , and I am sure I would feel hurt. Yeah ,I might very well go down on him again , esp if I was invested in the relationship. I'd be looking to 'understand' where he was cuming (lool) from!!

I have been going down on a man before and he has told me to change my tactic before , I was pleased he said that

I took it on the chin ,was a little embarrassed , but got over that quickly. No as quickly as he came tho....looool

But people are not sex robots. Again... think about consent. Consent can be withdrawn any time for any reason and if I am the person who gets in a hump over it, then I would need to take a long hard look at myself.

While I never had a partner say to me "hurry up, will you"? I've certainly had a partner...erm.. remove me from the area and pull me in for a kiss instead. And I take it as withdrawal of consent. Nothing more. Maybe he lost him mojo, maybe he got tired, maybe at that particular moment he did not feel up for it. Maybe he remembered that he hasn't had a shower that morning... Whatever. I don't overthink it.

My first girlfriend used to fake them when we first started having sex. Was quite annoyed with her when I figured it out, how was I supposed to figure out what worked when she was giving me the wrong signals. Was like playing Battleships and the other player telling you you'd got a hit when you hadn't.

Had the opposite problem with DP. She couldn't orgasm for the first 18 years of our relationship (Not a skill issue on my part honest, she can't give herself one either). As a result there's not a natural stopping point for her, so it took a while to work out which of her "I can't take any more!"'s actually meant stop and which ones would result in a "What are you stopping for!"

Happily, peri-menopause seems to have sorted out whatever was blocking her from getting there, so the last year has been a lot of fun!

Yes. I’ve only ever been with DH but when we first started having sex I didn’t really know what felt good etc so I would fake it, then once we had been together longer we figured it out together. Have faked it a couple of times in the last few years just when I knew it wasn’t going to
happen and I didn’t want him to feel bad

You sounded VERY grounded

Good to here from a MALE , thx.
That would be my guess , that a man WOULDN'T like the woman to fake it.

And glad you are having fun now!! Good for you! ;)

Yes i faked it a lot while I was married to my ex because he was a narcissist and would get very angry with me if I didn't come.

Maybe you werent very good at it, rather than it being something to do with him as you say.

And if he verbalised that, how would you take it?

Maybe, although the fact that he does it some times and no the others might suggest otherwise. We are very open about our likes and dislikes and generally talk freely about what we want the other partner to do.

If it was a ONS, then I would worry even less. Maybe I am not very good for that particular person. That's OK. We are not meant to fit well with every single person we have sex with. If someone I have sex with isn't able to express themselves clearly about how they like things... it's not really my business to get upset about it or take it personally.

Either way if someone withdraws consent, it's not my place to question it or act vindictively by vouching to never give them oral sex again. That's incredibly creepy and, dare I say, coercive.

Nope. Never had to and still don’t. 👍

Not since I was 17. I'd always prefer someone to tell if I'm not doing it how they like it.

No, never ever have. I don't see the point. Although having said that, I've never needed to. I've only had one sexual partner (same for him) and we've never had trouble in that department.

But sometimes its not through bad sex, the sex can be great but i dont orgasm every single time, especially if I have had a drink, my body just doesnt get there. And there are men who can't/won't finish until the lady has. Sometimes a white lie to protect a good lovers feelings is fine.

This is how we end up with so many men out in the wild who make women feel bad by saying, “Well, every woman I had sex with before had an orgasm before, so there must be something wrong with you.” Or, “I’ve never encountered a woman who can’t orgasm from penetration alone, so there must be something wrong with you.”

Really? Where can I find such a man??? Loool!!!

This is usually the only way orgasm through PIV too. It’s the pubic bone rubbing against the clitorous that does it for me.

No I haven’t to be honest. What would be the point in that? They will never learn if they think they are hitting the spot but they aren’t 🤣

So so true! Nicely put ,I agree!

Spot on. Excuse the pun!

Would a man ever fake one? I think we all know the answer to that. No woman should either. And yes, the majority of men find it easier/quicker than some women, but I don't think the few that struggle could care less what we were feeling! I am lucky in that I've never not been able to get there with my husband, but I wouldn't fake even if I couldn't.

Re "hitting the spot" , I am now wondering how many women are brave enough to say ....down a bit/L a bit/R a bit etc when that SPOT isn't quite being hit!!!
And is that in fact brave , or just something that needs to be said.....