Husband called the police on me. Does this effect on my DBS?

[Atifa]

My husband and I had argument and he asked me to leave the house. So I decided to take my two years old with me and go to my mother in law house. But my husband said if we leave the house he is going to call the police and he called the police. Last night police came and asked us a few questions and check the baby.
And honestly I don't know why my husband called the police, he does stupid thing when he is angry and I tried to be safe and take my son out of the house. And also I think my husband wants to make my DBS unclean as I am doing a teacher training course and I have been offered a good job opportunity. But I need to be sure my DBS is clean. And I think my husband wants to make this impossible for me.

Can I ask if anyone been in the same situation? Does this effect on my DBS? How can I check this? Should I called the police and ask? Should I ask my Health visitor ?

Thank you

As I say you've no reason to be concerned. You need to have been convicted in a court of law. Husband maliciously calling cops on you for no reason is nothing to do with it whatsoever.

Surely you can see that being treated like this isn't acceptable? You should speak to Women's aid.

The percentage of interview information on enhanced DBS is so tiny - less than 1% and definitely won’t apply to @Atifa so please don’t worry. My concern is that this abusive man will keep holding the threat of police involvement over his wife. @Atifa if he starts again, you call 999 and have him worry about his job. You have to make sure he doesn’t portray you as a bad mother. There are people who can help. I was in your situation once, a long time ago with a young baby. Please take action and get everything recorded.

A man who is saying he has nothing to lose is not a safe person to be around.

I would strongly suggest you do not return to living with him.

And definitely contact Women’s Aid.

You are worrying about the wrong thing. Your partner is out of order and this could escalate.

Could you leave and go stay with his mum more long term until you find your feet? Would that be an option? I wouldn't pay attention to him not being happy with it. What exactly did he call the police for? Most police will see through bad intentions, just explain to them what he is doing if it happens again.

I believe he was trying to show me as a bad mother, however this is kind of impossible. As I am continuously engaged with portage, baby groups, health visitor teams. And they know me as a mom who do everything for her son.

Good, don’t let him isolate you. It is worrying that he said he has nothing to lose. You need to report that to your GP and health visitor.

Please seek help. He worries me.

Please speak to Women's aid

He also said he has nothing to lose anymore which makes me worry

This is a very, very worrying statement.

OP it’s a massive drip feed to say he has MH problems.

So he likely felt a real threat, even if you feel you weren’t being aggressive - can you see how dangerous that is?

What did the police say?
Did they not advise one of you to leave?

Your DBS will be fine but social services will now be involved.

Either you did something more than what you’re saying on here or he is delusional due to his MH - either way you have to get out asap.

What did your DH tell the police and what did the police tell you and him? And what MH issues does he have and what medication does he take? Does the police know that he is mentally ill? I don't think we know anything tbh...

If you have No Recourse To Public Funds, Southall Black Sisters may be able to help.

My husband has mental health issues, I was very poorly on that day. And from what I remember I was lying on the bed when he came to the room and asked me to leave after we had very short argument about tissues. We had an argument, it was a complete verbal argument. We both said things, and I was on my period and ill. I wanted to go to my mother in law and he said he said he is going to ring the police. I hesitate, because I knew he wants to show me as a bad mom or ruin my DBS. Anyway I went to his mom's house. I don't mind social service to be engaged because I know I need them in some point but just wanted to be sure doesn't effect on my DBS, because I need a job.

This is not true. An advanced dbs check can include ‘any other information’ from local police forces. So if there is a pattern of arrests, for example.
Something like this would not be considered I think.

There are plenty of jobs that don’t require a DBS so don’t stress about that.

Focus on living separately from your DH.

Why have you gone to your MILs and not him when it’s his mum?
Can he not live there for a while?

Where is your mum?

What job did you do before getting pregnant?

It won’t. My abusive ex-husband was arrested many times and now works for the probation service!

He can’t ask you to leave the marital home. You should plan to, though. Do you know what medication he is on?

It’s up to the police what info they flag. That’s astonishing lack of judgement I would say.

Each Police Force maintains a local record of information, which can be used to disclose information referred to on a disclosure in the ‘other relevant information’ section on an enhanced check. This is formally known as ‘approved information’. It is often more commonly referred to as ‘non-conviction information’ or ‘police intelligence’.
That’s the info.
You wonder what they do decide to flag.

OP, I have such compassion for you here. You're saying you can't ltb. The problem is, he is very dangerous to you, emotionally at least.

This behaviour is so horrendous and it sounds like you are minimizing it. This is exactly what I have done my entire life within a highly dysfunctional emotionally abusive family. I have examples in my life of phone calls made to others when I was at my absolute weakest with illness and therefore emotionally destroyed.

Your husband is someone who has capacity to be incredibly abusive. This one act alone tells me this. It is absolutely appalling behaviour OP.

You can't leave right now so finding a way to be alongside this and staying safe is important for you. Getting what you need for this job is important as it is the road to financial independence. Telling a third party is like back up against further threats and accusations. Others will hopefully advise because you don't want to risk this getting back to him.

I'd use an anonymous search engine on your phone. It doesn't track what you've accessed. Duckduckgo is a good one.

I saw your post re SServices. Maybe it is not a bad idea to think how you are thinking. They aren't going to rip your children away and it looks like the DBS will be ok.

But - if he feels pissed off enough, he will escalate what he does. He could up it so much it becomes a living nightmare to manage it.

A third party needs to be aware somehow what's going on here as preparation for escalation. I'm not sure which place is a safe place to start exploring this and getting it logged.

I don't think you can trust his mum. Mum's can often protect their 6ft grown up abusive cherubs no matter what they do.

It’s something like 0.6% or 0.06% according to NACRO.

Yes - and OP you can delete your search history by going to apps - Safari - delete browsing history - close tabs. Otherwise the Mumsnet page will show every time you open your phone. If he knows your password, change it now.

It was before coercive control legislation and he was careful not to leave marks - hair pulling, spitting, name calling, sleep deprivation. 20 years ago there needed to be bruises or cuts, sorry to say.

Southall Black Sisters might be able to help you with visa issues