What do you do when your DH is verifiably wrong, tell him or let it go?

[Noshadelamp]

My DH thinks he's right and I'm wrong about a lot of little every day things. I can literally google it but he gets so annoyed when I tell him.

I'm just so fed up of him telling me I'm wrong when I'm not. Sometimes I am but not always.

Would you let it go or would you tell him, even if he's going to be annoyed?

An example that prompted this post: there's a road near us that has very tight bends and there was another accident today.
I said it needs those convex mirrors you sometimes see on tight bends, but he's said they are only for concealed driveways, never for tight bends.
He used to be a driver for his job and drives more than me, and said there's norhing in the highway code about the use of these mirrors for bends.
This part is actually true, but i know I've seen them, and Google says they can be placed by councils for tight bends.

See it's a silly every day thing but they build up and it's his attitude that he thinks I'm stupid and knows nothing that annoys me.

Ah bless I gave up years ago. Just be confident in the knowledge that you're not wrong

Occasionally I say really I was told.,.... He then googles and shuts up.

Given that he tells you you’re wrong - yes I would correct him, with evidence. Every single time.

He only gets annoyed that I google stuff because “don’t you trust me?”. Considering he’s also the type of idiot who will lick and electric fly swatter though… can he really blame me?

Yes. Every single time. I used tgo let things go, but then realised he actually thought he was smarter or knew more than me. He doesn't think this anymore.

Get him to prove he is right to you Make him do the work or you just won’t believe him.

He acts like it's a huge betrayal that I looked something up for myself.instead of taking his word for it.
Given how many times he's wrong, only a man has the entitled confidence to expect blind faith like that!

I used to have a partner like this.

I would tell him that there are some people in the world who can drink energy drinks and feel tired afterwards, rather than energetic (I am one of them) and I even showed him evidence (anecdotal evidence from other people and also some scientific research) and he called me a bitch. In a completely dead-pan serious tone.

Literally any time I tried to show him he was wrong about something, he'd just jump on the defensive and shut down and oftentimes would literally leave the house because I "made him angry". I don't think I was being rude with what I was doing - I was just trying to stop him from believing something harmful, for example.

It did my head in so I binned him off. Can't be arsed with people like him

He sounds like a dick head

OMG what a way to find out we are with the same man!

He wouldn’t read it
or if he did he’d find obscure listings which support his view

presumably you have been about to verifiably prove him wrong loads and loads of times in the past? How has that gone down?

I say “oh really? I thought it was…” and he says “oh ok maybe you’re right”. And if we can really be bothered we check online and see who’s right.

sounds like you also HAVE to be right. Sounds emotionally exhausting for both of you!

I used to have this
I hate someone telling me I’m wrong about something that I’m 100% correct about. It’s gaslighting

It better be the same one , because the idea of two of them existing?

I would struggle with this. Not because it’s terrible to be mistaken but im a genuinely curious person and i would find it deeply incompatible to be with someone who wanted to be ‘right’ more than they wanted to know the right answer.

Why do you both feel the need to be right? Sounds very unromantic

Pick your battles based on the fact does it matter in the big scheme of things? I just ignore much of it because I know I’m right when I’m right. For example, if I say oh I’m going to get some cuz to fix the abc…and he says oh that’s not right because blah blah blah…I just say mmmm ok…Google it to double check I’m right..and then get it anyway and sort the problem, no discussion needed! 😆

This
I like to learn and know what is correct ✅

My OH is like this sometimes. If it’s something I know I am 100% right on (there can’t be any doubt or he will be a complete nightmare on discovering he’s right!), I say a very sarcastic but breezy ‘ok, if you say so’. Passive aggressive I know, but most of the time he will correctly interpret my tone as disbelieving and look it up himself. So much more satisfying for him to find out himself that he is wrong than for me to have to look it up and point it out……😊

Oh god it’s like my partner. He swears blind that the plural or deer is deers and that Brussels sprouts should have an X in the bottom not the stork end. Google proved him wrong on both those occasions and it’s him who makes me out to be thick.
Love him dearly and wouldn’t have him any other way and I try to keep my gob shut nowadays 😀

Tell him. Luckily he knows I am nearly always right and when I'm not I own it, so it's all good.

Saying that, he sometimes does carry on with some things he knows are wrong (the correct use of less and fewer being a good example) because he knows it winds me up. Which it does every time. It's just how we roll.

You could ‘yes dear, of course dear’ it. Or take a ‘that’s interesting, I wonder what the Highway Code’ says etc. approach.

What he’s doing is a very recognisable male-type behaviour. Assuming that what they know is all there is to know on a subject. Being genuinely astounded and incredulous when it turns out there is more to know - or that others know more.

Thing is, I find it irritating when I state a fact and someone responds as if it’s an opinion, or looks it up. But that’s because I know the difference between fact, speculation and what is unknown to me and am happy to say which is what. I’m not in the habit of treating my limited knowledge as all there is to know, or my assumptions as facts. I find a lot of people cannot seem to maintain space for ‘I don’t know’ and genuinely seem to believe their own assumptions.

I turn it into a bit of a game and we google it and then the loser has to admit they are wrong. It's about 50/50 I reckon. We should really add more jeopardy and a winners dance.

Btw I think this is to do with male-type emphasis on status and tendency to embrace hierarchy. They take ‘facts’ as read from people and sources they view as ‘high status’ but see themselves as higher status than their female associates, conflating this with being more knowledgeable and ‘right’.

You being more knowledgeable or challenging them on facts is not understood as being about the facts - but as a challenge to their status.

I would tell him. Every time.